Page 40 of Falling for a Grumpy Hero

LILA

S omething had happened at the block party. I didn’t know what it was, but it’d sent Ford to that dark place in his mind and he obviously didn’t want to talk to me about it.

I’d seen it when he’d been standing at the grill and it seemed to have been ebbing and flowing ever since. As we moved through the dimly lit hallway that led to his bedroom, his gaze was locked on mine, all fire and intensity burning his eyes.

I allowed him to walk me back, my arms around his neck and my gaze unwavering on his. The man knew his own house and I trusted that he wasn’t about to crash into anything, so I kept my focus where it was needed most: on the Ford Callahan who was fighting against the monsters right now.

Which version of him that was, I didn’t know, but it seemed to be the guy who liked me.

Something might be up with him, but I didn’t need him to spill his guts every time he felt off-kilter.

He seemed to be reaching for me instead of pushing me away, and for as long as that was the case, I could be there.

I could give him what he needed in the moment and for now that was enough.

Without letting go of me, he kicked a foot out to swing his bedroom door open and pushed me inside, not bothering to shut it behind us. My heart skipped and jumped when he swept his tongue across his lips, his hard, big body molding against my own when he tightened his grip on me.

I dipped my head back a fraction of an inch and a grin ghosted across his mouth before he crushed it to mine. The kiss was as fiery and intense as that look in his eyes had promised and I leaned into it with everything I had.

Sliding my fingers into his short hair, I held him to me and parted my lips, moaning as his tongue dove into my mouth like a heat-seeking missile. With sure, long strokes of it against my own, he kissed the breath from my lungs and the thoughts from my mind.

He stepped into me, pressing his body as close to mine as he could get, until I felt every strong ridge and contour of him against me. Ford’s upper body moved with a rhythm that was almost primal, his breaths short and harsh while his hands roamed along my sides with desperate urgency.

His fingers flexed and gripped as he touched me, squeezing my ribs, my hips, and finally falling to cup my ass.

I arched into him, responding to his fierce intensity with a sense of urgency all my own.

I had never felt like my skin had been electrified all over until I’d started feeling it with him, but I suddenly felt like an exposed wire, every point of contact between us sending sparks through me.

Running his palms up the length of my bare arms, he curled his fingers under the off-the-shoulder sleeves of my top, grabbing my bra straps with them. He roughly shoved it all down to my waist, leaving my torso bare and my nipples pebbling into hard peaks that he immediately brought his fingers to.

Another moan slid out of me as the rough pads of his thumbs scraped across the tips of my nipples and he groaned, finally walking me back a little further until the backs of my knees touched his mattress. He broke our kiss and looked at me then, his pupils dilated and his chest heaving.

No lights were on in his bedroom and the sounds of the block party continued to filter in through his open windows, but the curtains were drawn, not allowing any ambient light inside either. Music and laughter drifted in the air, partially drowning out the sound of our heavy breathing.

As far as I was concerned though, it felt like those sounds were coming from miles away. In the near dark of his bedroom, Ford’s eyes seemed silver again, intently staring into mine as he lowered himself slowly to his knees.

My breathing hitched as I watched him, his dark hair sticking up in all directions and his demeanor strong and sure, but also suddenly almost apologetic. I would have given a lot to be able to see into his head right now, but on the other hand, I supposed it was better that I couldn’t.

In this bubble of ours, there was no pain, or trauma, or ghosts to haunt him. Ford was entirely focused on me and when he reached for my foot, I lifted it, completely happy to give myself over to whatever he had planned right now.

His fingers were quick and deft as he undid the straps of my sandal, then he tossed it away and got started on the next one. I remained completely silent, my breaths still coming out in pants, but I didn’t want to break this spell by speaking.

I’d found that often, with him, immersing myself in the magic of our connection seemed right. Easy. As natural as breathing.

With other people, silences often felt awkward to me, or like they needed to be filled in order to stop them becoming awkward, but not with Ford. He released the strap of my other sandal and got rid of that as well, staying on his knees as he brought his hands to the fly of my denim shorts.

His gaze was steady on mine, his fingers confident as he flipped open my button and tugged down on the zipper, but those eyes were filled with so many things that were being left unsaid. It was almost like in the silence, I could hear what he was feeling without him saying anything at all.

A strange mixture of relief, gratitude, sorrow, and longing stared back at me from those eyes.

Somehow, I knew he was happy the block party was over and that he was grateful I was still here.

I also knew that he was sad—probably because of some memories that had come back to him today—but that he still wanted me with him tonight.

I smiled and ran my fingers through his hair, and he leaned into my touch even as his hands dipped into my waistband and started tugging on my shorts and panties.

Despite the tenderness of the moment, neither the intensity nor the urgency he’d been feeling seemed to have abated, and as soon as my lower half was naked, he wrapped his fingers around the inside of my thighs.

Knowing what he was about to do, I lowered myself onto the mattress just as he roughly pushed my knees apart and groaned. The neediness in the sound made another flood of heat gush out of me, but I fought against the instinct to close my legs to hide it from him.

My inhibitions always seemed to flee when we were together and I was okay with it, surrendering fully when he brought his mouth to my clit and swirled his tongue around it.

I let out a low whimper and dug my fingers into his sheets, letting each scrape of his teeth and tongue coax me closer and closer to that blissful edge.

I felt his fingers sliding through my folds and trembled, arching my hips ever so slightly in a silent plea for him to enter me. Fingertips spread me apart and gently glided across every soaked bit of me, but he didn’t take it any further than that.

His tongue wreaked havoc on me, working with his hands to turn me into a mewling, quivering mess. Eventually when I couldn’t take it anymore, my eyes flew open and I propped myself up on my elbows to look at him.

“Ford,” I murmured between harsh breaths. “Please, I…”

His gaze came up to mine, his eyes slightly wild and unfocused as he jerked his chin in a nod. Pushing to his feet, he shed his clothes at the speed of light and grabbed a condom from his nightstand, rolling it on and positioning himself above me.

“Sorry,” he whispered as he slid his hands into mine and stretched them high above my head. “I lost myself for a bit back there.”

I tilted my head and pressed my lips to his, arching my back and bearing down when I felt the tip of him at my entrance. “Make it up to me.”

“Gladly.” He grinned against my mouth and thrust into me, his hands still in mine as he kissed me again.

Almost instantly, I started unraveling, moving with him at a furious pace that made me see stars and feel like I could touch the moon.

Ford found a rhythm and stuck to it, his pelvis brushing against my clit on every thrust. He moaned into our kisses, the throaty sounds only sending me higher and higher.

When I felt his thighs quiver and his stomach dip against mine, I knew he was close too and I let go, screaming his name as I clamped down on him.

The orgasm that barreled into me made the wait worthwhile, starting deep inside and working its way out to my extremities.

I swore I even felt it in my gums, my fingernails digging into his back as he thrust deep inside me before he swelled, his hips finally staggering as he found his release.

As he collapsed on top of me, both of us sweaty and panting, I folded my arms around his neck and toyed with the ends of his hair. My bones felt like jello, my insides still quaking and my very world feeling like it’d been tipped on its head after that.

Somehow, it’d been so incredibly tender and intimate, but also desperate and hungry, hard and fast. My eyelids fluttered closed as I wondered where this man had been all my life and why everything was so much better with him.

“I love you,” I breathed against his hair without even thinking about it. My brain was complete mush and all I knew right now was that I wanted to spend every day and every night with him for the rest of my life. “I do, Ford Callahan. I love you.”

He tensed above me, and in that moment, I suddenly realized what I’d just said—and that it’d been a complete slip. I hadn’t meant to tell him that yet. I knew it was too soon and I’d been trying to let him set the pace, but it was too late.

The next thing I knew, he was in a complete tailspin, rolling off me and swinging his legs off the mattress. In the dark, I could see the silhouette of his broad shoulders and they were completely tense as he stood up, mumbling something I couldn’t make out under his breath.

My heart started slamming against my ribs. “Ford, I?—”

“Yep,” he ground out as he retreated into the bathroom, walking so fast that he quickly melted into the shadows.

I groaned and flopped my arm over my eyes, embarrassment bleeding into every corner of my being. I felt awful and I hadn’t even really caught my breath yet, but I doubted that would make any difference to him.

“Shit,” I mumbled quietly. “Shit. Shit. Shit.”

I’d pushed too hard, too fast, and now, he’d literally run away from me without even taking the damn condom off. My mind spun out as humiliation settled into my bones. Whatever he’d muttered before he’d walked away, it hadn’t been that he loved me too—and that?

That was really the only thing I needed to know right now.