Page 34 of Falling for a Grumpy Hero

LILA

I could see it in his eyes. Ford Callahan wanted to let me in, but he didn’t know how.

Lucky for him, I wasn’t the quitting type. If I was, I would have been dead right now, but I also knew the value of every single second of life.

No one knew better than I did how fast everything could change. That was why, years ago, I’d made the decision to live every day to the fullest. Not in the slogan sense of the phrase, but in the very real sense.

I woke up every morning and recommitted myself to not wasting or taking for granted a minute of the joy the day could bring. That wasn’t something I was willing to compromise on.

While I really did like Ford—and really could see myself falling for him and giving it everything I had—I wouldn’t wait any longer for him to decide to try. As I looked into his eyes, it was like I could see the war within, turbulent, and violent, and undeniably dark.

All he had to do right now was take one step forward, toward the light, toward me, and I would know he was willing to act instead of carrying on letting life pass him by. He looked right back at me, but he didn’t move a muscle.

I sighed, my chin lowering in a curt nod. “It’s okay. I understand.”

“No, you really don’t.” He just about croaked the words, but as he did, he also took a big step forward.

Catching my face in his warm palms, he crashed into me, his mouth descending onto mine like he was underwater, starving for oxygen and I was an air tank. Intense relief spiraled through me as I wrapped my arms around his neck and held him closer, my lips parting to deepen our kiss.

Yes! It worked . He’s willing to fight and he’s going to let me do it with him.

I’d never felt this way before, but as his tongue tangled with mine and I felt him opening himself up to the possibility of us, I stopped fighting the unfamiliar intensity of those feelings. Ford and I could figure this out—as long as he was willing to do it—and it sure seemed like he was.

His tongue stroked mine with long, sure lashes, his arms banding around me like coils. A quiet groan escaped him and my heart went wild in response, even more so when he started walking us in the direction of his bedroom.

Or the guest room. I suppose it depends on how invested he is.

For a moment, I wondered if I should break the kiss, open my eyes, and make sure we both got wherever we were going okay. If he hurt that leg again, I wasn’t sure what the repercussions would be, but I trusted him and it turned out I’d been right to do so.

Before I even knew it, he stopped walking, but he didn’t let me go. We were still pressed together, only our mouths parting as our eyes opened. I blinked a few times in the darkness before I realized we were in his bedroom—and he’d brought me to his bed, but hadn’t laid me down on it.

I brushed my fingers through his hair and stared up at him. “Are you sure about this?”

“No,” he replied hoarsely, but he still didn’t let me go. In fact, his grip only tightened as he lowered his forehead to mine. “I would’ve preferred to do most of the work, but I can’t wait that long.”

I grinned. “Neither can I, and in case you haven’t noticed, I’m okay with working hard.”

“Really? When did you start being okay with that?”

Quiet laughter burst out of me and I gave his shoulder a playful smack. “Was that an actual joke, Ford Callahan? I didn’t think you knew how to make those.”

“I used to know.” He shrugged, his eyes crinkled at the corners but the expression in them still oddly solemn. “Every now and then, I remember.”

“I like it.” I pushed up on my tiptoes and pressed my palms to either side of his neck. “I like every version of you. Just as long as you don’t push me away when it gets hard.”

“ When it gets hard, not if?” he murmured, inhaling a deep breath that made his chest rise against mine. “I guess that’s probably accurate.”

“I already knew that.” I smiled and gave him a peck on either side of his mouth, but in response, he sealed his lips over mine and gave me a gentle shove.

It wasn’t hard enough to make me tumble onto the bed, but I sat down and dropped my hands to the hem of my shirt, crossing them over my hips before I lifted it off.

My skin bore marks that told a story of my very own, and while my scars weren’t as gruesome or as obvious as his, he would eventually see them. I just hoped it wasn’t tonight.

All I wanted tonight was him. All of him. No more talking of sadness or long-time pain. No more waiting or wondering if trauma had stolen everything that we could’ve had.

In the ambient light of the sparsely furnished bedroom, I saw his nostrils flare as he took me in, his gaze raking all over my chest and stomach. I wasn’t used to putting myself on display like this, but he’d put himself on display for me.

Maybe not by getting naked. Yet. But in all the other ways. Ways that had bared his soul and deepest hurts. That had taken way more courage than just shucking off clothes.

I reached behind my back next, my pulse hammering under my jaw, and I unhooked my bra.

Ford hadn’t said a word, but he was riveted by my every move and it was unexpectedly empowering.

Bold might not have been my middle name, but I slid the bra off and I pulled my arms free of the straps, then lifted the garment and dropped it to the floor.

My nipples pebbled under the cool air combined with his heated gaze, but I didn’t try to hide them. I wasn’t about to hide anything from him. Not even the scars. If he saw them and he asked, then we were both about to get buckets of ice dumped over us, but for now, I was just going to keep going.

We were back in our own little world, completely caught up in the heat of the moment and finally getting to stop dancing around each other. His breath caught as his gaze raked over me and I grinned, cocking an eyebrow as I inclined my chin.

“Your turn,” I muttered, not intending on letting him think too much right now.

I already knew what the scars on his leg looked like.

I’d seen the faint scars on his hands and forearms, and I didn’t want this to end just because he didn’t want me seeing any others he probably had.

“Dealer’s choice between shirt and pants. ”

Ford brought his gaze to mine, a cocky smirk appearing on his lips as his hands moved to his belt. He undid it slowly, flicking open the button of his slacks and watching me watch him.

Although I was pretty sure he didn’t mean for it to be, every move he made was erotic, like a muted strip tease. The night was quiet, the hum of the city outside barely reaching the room. I was too scared I’d break the spell we were both under if I spoke again, so I kept my lips zipped.

I’d been dying to see what he was packing, and who was I to stop him if he wanted to show me that first? His strong fingers reached for his zipper. The sound of him lowering it was loud in the silence that was only punctuated by our ragged breathing.

Or maybe it was just mine that was ragged. My chest was rising and falling fast. I hadn’t even caught my breath since that kiss and I didn’t want to. Who needs air anyway?

Ford’s eyes seemed silver-gray in this light when I glanced back up at him, noticing that he hadn’t looked away. He seemed completely confident and unconcerned about scars or showing his body at all.

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

That smirk was still on his lips when he lifted his pants over his erection, pausing to kick off his shoes. They landed with soft thuds, but I didn’t bother to check how far he’d kicked them. Because it turned out that he hadn’t just been lifting his pants. He’d also been lifting his underwear.

He dropped it all in one go, stepping out of the pool of fabric without hesitating once.

On the other hand, he’d had no reason to hesitate.

In my periphery, I could make out networks of faint lines where his skin was shinier than in other places.

Those were the scars, but who would be studying them when they could be looking at his dick instead?

Not me, that’s for sure.

I stared openly, my mouth drying up as I drank in his long, solid shaft standing proudly erect, only the tiniest bit of a curve to the very end. The tip was bare and shimmery in the dark, a bead of wetness gathered there.

I couldn’t help sucking in a sharp breath when I noticed it. My body had been raring to go before, but seeing the evidence of how much he wanted me with my own two eyes made my blood sing in my veins.

“See?” he muttered. “I told you that you had no idea.”

Accepting the challenge, I lay back on his bed and quickly undid my jeans, rolling them off to my ankles before I remembered that I was wearing shoes. I refused to be embarrassed about it though, toeing off the sandals and hearing them land with quiet slaps on the floor.

When I sat up again, I looked him right in the eyes and stood up on my knees. God, I must look like such a hussy right now.

Ford’s quiet but audible intake of breath made it worth it, though. Besides, he’d been so confident and self-assured, and I wanted to try it on for size. It really worked for me in so many ways I hadn’t known it would.

When our gazes met, it was like the final bit of restraint snapped. He surged forward and wrapped those strong, warm arms around me again. Rolling onto his back, he brought me with him, his lips finding mine and devouring me like he’d been starved for millennia.

His hands were all over me, his rough palms sliding across every inch of my skin that was within his reach. My nerve endings were suddenly supercharged, every brush of his fingers against any part of me making me want him more.

When they dipped between my legs, I lifted one to drape it over his thighs, breathing through the intense urge to start moving.

He didn’t immediately dive in though, choosing instead of drive me completely wild by dragging his fingertips over me, sliding them through my folds like he was committing that most intimate part of me to memory.

Moans spilled from my mouth into his and I suddenly remembered that two could play this game. I reached for him then, starting slowly by running my fingers across his pelvic bone, down to his hips, and through his neatly trimmed pubic hair.

Every so often, one of us gasped or moaned, the sounds of our exploration of one another eventually filling the silence without a single word. As I wrapped my fingers around the velvety length of him, however, he’d finally had enough.

“Get on top of me,” he murmured, his tone low and commanding. “Now, Lila.”

“We need a condom,” I whispered, but even as I did, I obeyed. I always seemed to without even thinking about it.

Ford smiled up at me, but it wasn’t cocky now. It was sweet. Caring even. “In the nightstand. You should be able to reach it.”

As I straddled him, I glanced to the side and saw the promised land—a drawer that was, happily, well within my reach. I leaned over and slid it open, finding what I’d been looking for just as he sucked one of my nipples into his mouth.

“Oh!” I arched into him, moaning as I fumbled for the foil packet that had just been underneath my fingers. I found it but didn’t sit up immediately, letting my eyes slide shut as he laved at my chest, eliciting sensations I’d never felt before.

But I was also aching for him in all the other places, so I finally handed over the condom and watched as he tore it open. Eyes on mine, he dropped the wrapper and moved his hands to his cock to roll it on.

I wanted to watch him do it, but I couldn’t stop looking at his face. The way his hair was sticking up from having had my hands in it and how his full lips were slightly parted. The furrow of his brow and the soft vulnerability that mingled with the heat in his eyes.

He’d never admit it, but this meant more to him than just a one-time surrender to mutual attraction. I knew it beyond a doubt. It was the same for me.

Once the condom was on, he took my hands and brought them to the headboard behind them. Then he moved his palms to my hips. I lifted up and positioned myself right above him, sinking down slowly and feeding him deep into me one inch at a time.

Ford groaned, jerking once when he was fully seated like he just couldn’t help but move, but then he gave me a moment to adjust. I needed it, too. I felt him everywhere, in places I hadn’t even known I had places, but it was so good that I also couldn’t keep still.

Using the headboard for balance and leverage, I started moving up and down and Ford moaned, realizing that I was ready. He took control even though I was on top, quickly finding a pace that I couldn’t resist. I rocked with him, losing myself to the pure bliss spiraling through me.

My tongue swiped across my lips when he moved a hand to my clit, watching me and obviously not missing a single reaction to anything he did. Because when he found things I liked, he kept doing them over and over again.

My head dropped back, our combined rhythm increasing until it was so perfect that I couldn’t take it anymore. I surrendered to the pleasure that had been knocking since he’d first touched me, coming so hard that I forgot everything except his name.

Somewhere in the midst of it all, I felt him swell deep inside me and it was almost as if I could feel the intense relief pouring off him as he let go. Deep, throaty sounds rumbled in his chest, the sexiest noises I’d ever heard in my life.

When I was finally spent, I lay down on top of him and he held me tight, bringing his lips to my ear. “I hope you’re not too tired yet. I’m very far from being done with you for tonight.”