Page 121 of Everything After

Alfie spun me around to face him, placed his fingertips over my lips, his broody eyes clearly annoyed by my question. “There are no buts, Lily. You’ll always be beautiful to me. The connection we have isn’t only based on how you look… maybe in the beginning before you touched me it was, but never since then. You could blindfold me, place me in a room with a hundred girls and I’d know it was you the second you touched me. There has never been another woman who’s had such an electrifying effect on my body, like you’ve got.”

“Thanks, but I think you know what I’m talking about. Image can be everything at the wrong time. The media pick on women artist, they love to post pictures when we’re not at our best. They don’t usually do that to men, and I’m not as adept at shaking off criticism as you are.”

“Aren’t we all that matters?”

“I wish. But I’m sure the media will have plenty to say, once they know that I’m pregnant.”

“Then they’ll have to deal with me,” he snapped. His protective tone jolted me out of my mood.

“Hell, maybe I’m just finding that I have some time on my hands and nothing else to grumble about,” I said, waving off my concerns.

“Don’t diminish your feelings like that. I’m not dismissing anything you’ve said about the press but aren’t I what matters? Up until now, we’ve lived our lives in the limelight?—”

“Oh, I hate these fucking hormones. They make me feel irrational all the time,” I blurted when I realized I’d taken our normal conversation and turned it into my likely persecution by the press.

“Aw, baby. Let’s get back to Florida and take a lazy day in the sun.”

Alfie’s thoughts on a relaxing day were cut short when I had a call from Lennie before we’d even reached Dallas airport.

“Have you left for the airport yet?” he queried in an urgent tone.

“We’re just leaving the hotel now,” I advised as we stepped out onto the sidewalk. Oscar walked ahead of us, opened the limousine door, then Alfie and I climbed in.

“I’ve had a call to say there’s a spot on the Jimmy Fallon show tomorrow night. There was a South African band scheduled to perform. Problem is they were flying in from Australia until some bush fires grounded their flight. They were cutting it fine to begin with what with the time changes, so the production team decided to pull them, and needs a music segment stand-in.”

“Aren’t we back in the studio on Monday?”

“I figured it’s only a hop to New York then down to Miami afterward, since you’ll be on a plane anyway.”

“I don’t think it’s quite that simple,” I argued, annoyed that he hadn’t taken into consideration that all the traveling felt more exhausting for me right now.

“Well, anyway, I’ve said yes,” Lennie muttered with a note of resignation in his tone that insinuated I shouldn’t complain.

“I’ll speak to Alfie and see you there, I guess.” I hung up before he could say anything else.

Alfie gestured with an upturned hand, then said, “Well? What was that?”

“We need a diversion. Lennie’s agreed to XrAid performing on the Jimmy Fallon show tomorrow.”

“Without asking you first?” he spat, angrier than I’d sounded when I’d told him.

“It doesn’t matter… can you just arrange the flight, please?”

“I’m fucking sick of this,” he ground out. “What the hell’s gotten into him? Wait until I see him,” he threatened.

“Alfie, please don’t interfere. And I think this has more to do with what’s gotten into me,” I mumbled as I rubbed my swollen belly. A heavy feeling settled inside my chest, lowering my mood. I felt depressed by how cross Lennie appeared to be about my pregnancy. It felt as if the man I’d put my faith in had suddenly turned into someone I didn’t know.

“C’mere,” Alfie mumbled, pulling me flush with his body and wrapping his arms around me. “It’s like I said, baby. Your band have been used to you showing up, being thankful for them choosing you, and you being happy to go with the flow for too long. But times change, and this is the time they need to show you what you mean to them.”

“I know…”

“Let’s arrange that flight to New York, get that show out of the way, then you can tell the guys you’re not flying anymore until after you have the baby.”

“Good plan,” I agreed. Lennie’s behavior was tiring, and Alfie had a point—why should I need to be the one to compromise all the time?

“Are you on your way back to Miami already?” Jack asked as we boarded Alfie’s plane, once the new flight path had been scheduled, and accepted in New York.

“XrAid has a gig on the Jimmy Fallon show tomorrow,” I explained.