Page 185 of Discordant Cultivation

“It f-felt bad,” Kieran said slowly, searching for words through the fog. “Like a remnant of my old life. I was d-disgusted by it, so I broke it. I didn’t want to think about it anymore.”

“Exactly.” Vale’s voice was soft, loving, the tone he used when Kieran had given the perfect answer. “Sometimes we have to destroy things that remind us of who we used to be.”

Destroy things. Yes. That makes sense.

“Kiss me,” Vale whispered.

Eyes still closed, Kieran turned his head blindly toward Vale’s voice, their lips meeting with desperate familiarity. The kiss made his headache recede, made Alex’s screaming fade to background noise, made everything else disappear except the warmth of Vale’s mouth against his.

This is nice. This is safe. Vale’s kissing me and everything is—

Vale pushed their joined hands downward.

The resistance was brief—fabric, then something softer that gave way with a wet sound. Alex’s shouting cut off with horrifying abruptness, replaced by a gurgling that made Kieran’s blood run cold even through the haze of the kiss.

“I love you,” Vale whispered against Kieran’s lips.

Kieran opened his eyes and the world tilted sideways.

Their hands—both sets of fingers wrapped around a black handle that disappeared into Alex’s throat. Blood was already seeping around the blade, dark and thick, staining the hood where it pressed against his neck.

“No.” The word came out as barely a whisper. Kieran’s hands started shaking, the knife trembling in the wound. “No, no, no—”

Panic exploded through his nervous system like electricity. He yanked the blade free without thinking, and blood erupted fromAlex’s throat in rhythmic pulses that sprayed up onto Kieran’s face and chest. Hot copper flooded his mouth where the arterial spray hit his lips.

Kieran stumbled around to Alex’s front, his legs giving out as he fell to his knees. His hands pressed against the wound, but there was so much blood—it pulsed between his fingers with each weakening heartbeat, slick and warm and impossible to stop.

“I can f-fix this,” Kieran gasped, his voice high and desperate. Alex’s body was going slack, slumping in the chair. “I can—Alex, stay with me. Just keep p-pressure on it—”

Apply pressure. That’s what you do. You apply pressure and you call for help and—

But there was no one to call. Just Vale watching. Just the soundproofed walls as witnesses.

Alex wasn’t responding. His chest was still moving, rapid and shallow, but the gurgling sounds were getting weaker. Kieran could feel his pulse fluttering against his palms, growing fainter with each passing second.

The metallic scent of blood mixed with the familiar basement smell, creating something nauseating that made Kieran’s empty stomach heave. His hands were completely red now, Alex’s life literally flowing through his fingers despite everything he was trying to do to stop it.

“P-Please,” Kieran sobbed, pressing harder against the wound even as more blood welled up around his palms. “Please don’t d-die. I didn’t mean—I didn’t know—”

I was just holding it. I was just kissing him. I didn’t know what we were doing. I didn’t—

Vale’s hands closed around his wrists, pulling him away from Alex’s body with gentle but inexorable force. Kieran fought against the grip, desperate to keep pressure on the wound, but Vale was stronger.

“Wh-Why?” Kieran’s voice cracked as Vale’s bloodied hands cupped his face, wiping away tears that only smeared more blood across his cheeks. “Why did you make me—why did we—”

He tried to look back at Alex, but the guitar had slipped from the dead man’s hands and hit the concrete with a discordant crash that seemed to echo forever.

The guitar. Someone should tune that guitar. The fall probably knocked it out of—

The thought was so absurd, so wrong, that it broke something in Kieran’s mind. A sob tore from his throat.

“Stop looking there,” Vale said, his grip tightening on Kieran’s face until it was almost painful. “There’s nothing there for you to worry about. It’s just us. Just our love. Nothing else matters.”

Just us. Just love. Nothing else.

Kieran’s breath hitched as Vale continued, his voice dropping into that hypnotic register that always made everything else fade away. “We’re safe together forever. No one can hurt us. No one can take you away from me.”

Vale’s lips pressed against his, and Kieran’s mind fractured again, split between horror and the familiar comfort of Vale’s touch.