Page 95 of Degradation

“You could have let me die.” She says. “I was so close. So close. How could you take that from me? How could you be that cruel?”

I wince, hearing the bitterness in her voice, the sadness too.

It’s never bothered me before. Her tears, her pain, none of it has. It was nothing to me. She was nothing to me.

And yet, that’s not true, is it.

“I couldn’t do it.” I snap back. “Just like I couldn’t bear to watch all those men touching you when you belong to me.”

Her face reacts. She trembles more. “No.” She says with as much strength as she can muster. “No.”

“You know it’s true.”

Her head turns towards the door, to where we both know two people waiting, are listening.

“You can’t say that.” She whispers.

I hear what she’s not saying. That she knows my words are true, that somewhere, she admits it. She is mine, just as I stated.

I get to my feet, clicking my neck.

“I’ll deal with it.” I murmur low enough for her to hear.

It’s not like they were going to live anyway. It’s their bad luck they were working tonight, their bad luck they were here. I won’t let them speak of this, won’t let them divulge what Paitlyn tried to do, what happened here.

I’ll have to burn the sheets, burn the rags too. But all of it can be managed. All of it can be sorted. One thing at a time.

I twist the silencer onto my pistol. No need to create more drama.

And quietly, I creep up behind the two unsuspecting medics.

Devin

Ishouldn’t be in here, watching her, and yet I can’t help it.

It’s been days since she tried to kill herself, days since she dared to try to leave me. She’s still fast asleep, curled up, completely exhausted, and yet, I still feel like there’s some battle raging inside her.

A little voice in my head tells me that I can do it, that I can steal her away, that it’d be easy right now. No one is around. There’s a skeleton crew on watch. I could scoop her up, drug her just to make sure she’s compliant and disappear into the night.

I shut my eyes, imagining how it would feel, imagining every step. The crunch of the dirt outside the Palace, the sneakingpast all those cameras, ducking from the brightness of the floodlights.

I could leave all this behind. Could leave everything.

My body reacts to that thought, to that dream that’s been in my mind since as long as I could remember. Since I was a child, hiding in Oblivion, hiding from my brothers.

Of course, then I used to imagine running away with my old friend. With Jefferson. I used to beg him to do it, beg him to follow me out. But the thing people don’t realise about the darkness is that if you exist in it for too long, then soon enough it starts to alter you, change you, carve you into something new. It strips away the weak parts, it tears off the bits that dares to dream. And all you have left is the fear and the anger.

That’s how it went with Jefferson. He made peace with his fate. He accepted what he was, where he was.

I’m not sure I’m ready to do that yet.

I look back at the sleeping beauty and take a step towards her. It wouldn’t be hard to steal her. It really wouldn’t be…

“Devin.”

Cooper’s voice carries from the doorway. Makes me freeze.

For a second I contemplate continuing, contemplate seeing this out to its logical conclusion. But to do that, I’d have to kill him. Not that I’m concerned about the morality of it, but Cooper is a decent enough guy.