Page 68 of Confessions

She’d seen Hayden each night and looked forward to greeting him at the front door. Sometimes he smelled of sawdust and oil, and she’d known he’d been at one of the mills. Other times he carried the scent of leather or soap with him, as if he’d just come from the shower.

He’d brought wine for her, soda for the boys and had taken it upon himself to fix the chain on Bobby’s bicycle, getting himself greasy in the process and delighting her youngest son. Hayden Monroe certainly knew how to carve his way into her heart.

She couldn’t be falling in love with him, she told herself, and wouldn’t let it happen. Her runaway emotions were on the loose and it was time to rein them in.

“What a mess,” she told herself, and clicked on the radio. She hadn’t wanted an affair with any man and certainly not Hayden, yet she was involved with him up to her neck. She thought about him constantly and, as she had throughout her trip from Coleville, she tried to concentrate on her work.

Elizabeth Wheeler, the owner of Beth’s Boutique, had been encouraging. She’d ordered three more jackets and two dozen pairs of earrings.

“They’re going like hotcakes. Kids as well as adults,” Beth had confided in Nadine two hours earlier. “If you can’t get them here by Christmas, I’ll want them for spring!”

Nadine smiled to herself. It seemed as if her life was turning around, despite everyone’s dour predictions about Hayden Monroe and his grim effect upon the town. Even Nadine’s father seemed a little happier, and though he wouldn’t confide the reason for the spring in his step when they’d gone to lunch this afternoon, Nadine suspected that he was interested in another woman for the first time in years. He’d hardly dated since her mother had walked out on him, but there was definitely something different about him in the past couple of days and she didn’t believe his change in mood was just because the spirit of Christmas was in the air or because Ben was on his way home. No, the twinkle in her father’s eyes could only be attributed to the attentions of a woman. But whose attentions?

Time would tell, she decided, turning into the drive and spying Hayden’s Jeep.

He was waiting for her, legs outstretched, ankles crossed, hips resting on the fender. Her heart skipped a beat and she wondered fleetingly if there was a chance for them. In a millisecond she pictured herself as Hayden’s wife, living in the manor across the lake, spending hours with Hayden, making love with him, having more children.... Reality broke the spell. Hayden wasn’t going to stay in Gold Creek. He would probably sell his string of sawmills, perhaps even close some of them, and he didn’t want a wife and especially not any children; she’d learned that much. Being the product of an unhappy marriage, with unrealistic goals placed upon his young shoulders, Hayden had decided from an early age to depend upon no one but himself. He didn’t want a wife and kids.

As her silly bubble of happiness burst, she parked near the garage. With Hayden, she had to live for the moment and forget about a future.

Forcing a smile, she slid out of the car and was rewarded with a crushing embrace and a kiss that sucked the breath from her lungs and made her bones as weak as jelly.

His body fit intimately against hers, and the realization that she loved him hit her like the proverbial ton of bricks. For weeks she’d been denying it, burying her feelings, telling herself her emotions were on the rampage because she’d been without a man for so long. But now, with his arms around her, his lips devouring hers, his hands possessive, she knew she’d lost her heart to him and she doubted she’d ever retrieve it.

He lifted his head to stare into her eyes. “God, I missed you,” he said hoarsely as he captured a handful of her hair and twined his fingers through the thick, red curls. Her heart seemed to crack.

“I saw you this morning,” she pointed out, thinking of their goodbye kiss on the front porch at one-thirty.

“That was a long time ago.”

“Mmm. Too long,” she admitted. “I missed you, too,” she admitted.

“I could tell.” He slapped her on the rump playfully, but let his hand settle over the curve of her hip.

“Could you?” She wound her arms around his neck and licked her lips provocatively. “How?”

He groaned. “You’re wicked, woman.”

“And you love it.”

He laughed and kissed her again. “I have half a mind to carry you into the house, throw you on the bed and ravage you until you beg for mercy.”

“The half a mind part, I believe.”

His eyes flashed. “Well, I guess I’ll just have to prove it to you.” Quickly he scooped her up and threw her over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry.

“Hayden, no!” she cried, laughing as the blood rushed to her head and her hair nearly swept the ground. Hershel yipped and bounded in excitement, trying to lick Nadine’s face. “Please, put me down!”

“You asked for it.”

“No, I— Hayden, oh, come on—”

He started packing her up the back steps to the door. “How much time do we have before the boys get home?”

“They’ll be here any minute.”

“Liar.”

“It’s...it’s the truth!”