Page 20 of Confessions

“You’re still mad at me,” Sam said, touching her arm.

“I’m not mad.”

“Just because I tied one on. It was a stupid thing to do and I’m sorry. It won’t happen again. Come on, Nadine, don’t hold a couple of drinks against me.”

“It was more than a couple.”

“I got a little out of hand—”

“You threw up all over the back porch, Sam,” she said, irritated. Even her parents had been angry.

“I’m sorry. Forgive me?” he asked.

“Nothing to forgive.” She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around her knees. Sam had added liquor to his soda last night, and it was the first time Nadine had ever seen him drunk.

Leaning back on his elbows, Sam adjusted his sunglasses to protect his eyes. He had sobered up since the night before and was suffering with a hangover. His skin was paler than usual and two aspirin hadn’t seemed to help to ease the pain of what he called a thundering headache. “Don’t tell me. I know,” he said, wincing as a ten-year-old boy set off a string of firecrackers against all park and company regulations. The kid was promptly scolded by his mother. “I deserve this.” Sam reached for her hand and held it between two of his. “I probably wouldn’t have gotten so drunk if you wouldn’t have been in such a rotten mood.”

“So now it’s my fault?” she asked, removing her hand and feeling uneasy.

“What’s going on, Nadine? Something’s not right—and don’t bother trying to deny it.”

She couldn’t. It was time to be honest with Sam. She owed him that much. “I...I just think we shouldn’t see so much of each other,” she said in a quick rush of breath.

Sam didn’t move a muscle, just continued staring across the lake. “So much of each other?”

“Yes...”

“You want to date other guys?”

“I—”

“Who?” he demanded, suddenly facing her. His face suffused with color while his lips turned white.

“Who what?”

“Who is he?” he asked, his voice low. “There’s someone else, isn’t there?”

“No one special,” she lied.

“Like hell! Dammit, Nadine, where’d you meet him?” he demanded, suddenly furious.

“I just think it’s time we saw other people. That’s all.”

“Why now?” He glanced around, as if he expected one of the boys at the picnic to come up to Nadine and claim her as his own. “It’s not like we’re going steady or anything.”

Nadine tucked a strand of hair around her ear and hoped their conversation didn’t carry to other knots of people crowded around the stretch of beach. “In this town, two dates with one person is the same thing as going steady. You and I both know it. People couple up.”

“And you don’t want to be part of a couple.”

She steeled herself. She didn’t want to hurt him, but she couldn’t live a lie. “Not right now, Sam.”

His shoulders slumped as if with an invisible weight, and she felt instantly sorry for him. She liked Sam, she did. But he wanted their relationship to deepen, and he wasn’t the boy for her. The sooner he knew it, the better for him, she reasoned, but couldn’t help feeling like a heel.

And just who is the boy for you? Hayden Garreth Monroe IV? She frowned and picked up a small stone, skipping it along the surface of the lake and watching the rings of water ripple in perfect circles.

“I guess this is it, then,” Sam finally said, his jaw set in stony determination.

“We—”