Page 58 of Choosing Hope

“I think you know the answer to that,” he eventually replies, dismissing my question. “I’ve ordered food, and your beer.”

His mentioning of the beer triggers my thoughts, and I push away thoughts of Sophie. If I let them consume me, the whole evening will spiral.

“How long are you staying?”

“I’ve got a flight back to Rome on Sunday night.” He reaches for some sweatpants, narrowing his eyes at me as if still trying to interpret my question.

“Can we go down to Justin’s club on Sunday afternoon?” I ask. Eager to get back into the ring with him.

“To fight?” The incredulity in his tone tells me he thinks the idea is ridiculous.

“Yeah.” I stand my ground, unwilling to allow him to discourage me.

He scoffs. “In that state, I’ll fucking annihilate you.”

“We’ll see,” I force myself to reply cockily but I’m fairly sure he’s right.

Though with all the pent-up anger I have, losing a fight to Carlo might be just what I need to kick me into action. Literally.

Chapter Thirteen

Sophie

After days without sleeping, last night, having received Carlo’s late voice message, I finally relaxed enough to get a few hours of rest. This morning, I’m feeling better, if not a little anxious.

Carlo promised yesterday he’d try to get Spencer to come home with him, but he gave him a get-out clause by saying he wasn’t aware of my husband’s schedule.

Now that I have access to the network and his diary, I can see Spencer has a meeting at the office with someone called Branston at eleven o’clock, I’m also pleased to see he has a note of Lily’s birthday party. Hopebubbles in my gut.

If Spencer doesn’t make it, Lily will be so upset, but I’ve made no promises that he will, explaining how busy her Daddy is.

I haven’t even told her that Uncle Carlo is coming today, for fear of his plans changing.

I chose my outfit carefully this morning, hoping to choose something to make me irresistible to Spencer—if he arrives—without looking too tarty to the other mothers. I ended up with a pale blue fitted Ralph Lauren linen dress that I hadn’t worn for years. It’s casual and classic but fits really well and shows my curves to perfection.

This morning’s search through my wardrobe made me realize how many of the clothes I use most regularly are Mumsie and frumpy. Perhaps it’s time for an upgrade.

Once I’m in the right underwear, my girls are boosted just the right amount, providing onlookers with an eyeful without being too slutty.

Because I’ve lost my appetite over the last few weeks, my weight has dropped like a stone. My arms look a little scrawny but aside from that, my dress helps to conceal my new skinny form well. A navy cardi will help to conceal my ugly arms.

After greeting the delivery men with Lily’s bouncy castle, I left them to set up and went inside to prepare the party food.

An overly excited Lily stands at the patio doors, watching the men setting up her castle, and giving me a running commentary.

She’s cute, and bright as a button. Hence her father’s nickname for her, Button.

Her friends are due to arrive around two o’clock, giving me all morning to get things organized. I’ve catered some of the food, but because it’s her first proper party, and there’s such social pressure from a few of the more judgmental mothers at the school, I’m preparing certain things myself.

The birthday cake, which is shaped like Belle, her favorite Disney princess, should arrive around midday.

After fifteen minutes, Lily’s excitement calms. She wanders over to see what I’m doing but quickly loses interest in that, before sloping off into the den to play with her toys, leaving me to get lost in my tasks.

I’m knee-deep in raw vegetables and hummus, trying to arrange them creatively, hoping to appeal to young children when a muscular arm grabs me around the waist, making me squeal.

Glancing down, I recognize the thick, veiny forearm covered in dark hair as being Carlo’s instantly.

“Jesus! You nearly gave me a heart attack.” My hand goes to my chest.