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Page 40 of Beneath the Mountain Sky (McBride Brother Lumberjacks #1)

“Raven helping me pack.” My body starts to vibrate. “I was panicking. I packed, and I left.”

“Why did you leave?”

I wince as the tears start to burn in my eyes, even with them closed.

None of this is anything Killian and Raven haven’t already told me, but it’s as if I’m experiencing it for the first time. All those agonizing feelings twist my gut and tighten my chest.

“I couldn’t tell him…”

Couldn’t do it.

“Tell him what?”

“He didn’t want?—”

I suck in a sharp breath, trying to stop myself from hyperventilating. It gets harder and harder to process the memories.

“He didn’t want what, Willow?”

“He told me I’d be a bad mother, and I had to leave. I drove away, but…I turned around.”

“Where?”

I squeeze my eyes even tighter, trying to get the picture of the road to clear in my head. “I made it out of town, an hour or so, then turned back, came through town, and was headed up the mountain to Killian’s.”

My fingers tighten on the arms of the chair the same way they did the steering wheel as I navigated the road.

“What happened?”

The sound of tires crunching on gravel.

A clunk.

Smoke.

“My…my truck overheated. I pulled over.”

It was always doing that. We were going to buy a new one soon. I was annoyed that it was going to delay me getting home.

“And then what happened?”

I tilt my head, trying to see the road more clearly, but it was raining. A summer storm. It made it difficult to see through the deluge.

But I could hear.

The sound roars in my ears.

“I heard another vehicle, someone stopping to help me.”

“Good, Willow. And who was it?”

I attempt to picture the face, to see who stopped, but I can’t. A form approaching through the driving rain. A knock on the window. Rolling it down to talk. “I don’t…I don’t know.”

“Was it a man or a woman?”

Pain slices at my temples, and I reach up and rub my fingers into them. Darkness sweeps across my vision, blanketing what should be a very clear image of the person I’m speaking with.

“Remember, you’re in a safe space, Willow. The cabin with Killian. Nothing can hurt you. Breathe in. Breathe out. Keep it slow. ”

I struggle with his command.

Trying to get my lungs to cooperate.

The cabin.

Killian’s arms.

Safety.

His scent.

It melts away the anxiety and pain in my head.

Clears the clouds covering the memory.

“A man. It was a man’s voice.”

“What did he say?”

“He…he called me Bobby.”

“Bobby?”

I nod.

Squeezing my eyes closed.

Trying to stay in the memory.

“And then he…” A sharp crack of agony hits the back of my head, and I place my hand there, the echo of the pain coming through vividly before blackness takes over again. “I think he hit me with something.”

* * *

KILLIAN

It takes every single ounce of restraint I possess to keep from launching myself across the room and pulling Willow into my arms, dragging her out of the horrific memory she’s recounting and back to safety.

Tears stream down her face from her squeezed-closed eyes.

Her knuckles whiten where they grasp the armrests in a death grip.

My nails dig into my palms as I clench my fists so tightly that they sting. I grind my jaw so intensely that my teeth actually ache, threatening to crack. Every muscle in my body vibrates with the self-control it takes me to stay in place.

Liam inches closer to me along the office wall, like he’s about to intervene, if necessary, but I give him a little shake of my head to tell him I’m good, even though I’m not.

Not at all.

The doctor glances up at me as if he, too, shares Liam’s concern.

Then, I meet Tony’s gaze briefly across the room.

His jaw is locked tight, just like mine, his brow furrowed as he jots down notes into his little notebook. Documenting every word she says while under hypnosis.

All of our worst fears coming true as her memory unravels.

Willow wasn’t gone by choice.

Willow was taken.

We had pieced it together, suspected as much, but hearing it in Willow’s own unsteady voice. Having to stand here while she recounts the reality of her own abduction…

It’s too horrific.

Too real.

Dr. Bird returns his focus to Willow, apparently appeased that I won’t be a problem when I’m trembling almost as badly as she is. “Remember, you’re in the cabin. You’re happy and safe. You’re breathing slowly. In and out.”

Come on, Honeybee.

Breathe.

I remember how she was two nights ago when she woke in a panic—unable to do it on her own. How she needed me to help her through it.

The soft, soothing tone Dr. Bird uses as he guides her seems to help Willow relax slightly, her labored breaths evening out.

I want to scream that she shouldn’t have to do this right now. That it can wait. That she needs time. That we can’t keep doing this to her. That we can’t keep pushing her to remember something that hurts so much.

But if I intervene, she won’t ever be free.

Willow won’t ever be herself again until we find out who did this to her and make them pay.

Which means I have to control my most basic instincts to protect her from this pain. I have to trust the doctor to keep her safe.

Dr. Bird reminds her of that as her breathing seems to return to normal. “Willow, remember you’re safe.”

She nods almost imperceptibly, that death-grip loosening slightly from the arms of the chair.

“What’s the next thing you remember?”

“Pain.” She winces. “I had such a bad headache.”

My stomach twists violently, and I shift my stance, leaning my other shoulder against the wall because I just can’t remain still anymore when she’s hurting so badly.

“What did you see when you opened your eyes?”

Willow squeezes her eyes closed tighter. “A cabin.”

Acid climbs my throat.

Dr. Bird jots notes in his own notebook. “Did you recognize it?”

She shakes her head. “No, it looked…” Her head tilts to the side slightly, as if she can see it in her mind and is searching for the proper way to explain it. “Strange.”

“Strange how?”

“Old.” A pause. “Very rundown.” Then another as she examines the image in her head. “Not like any cabin I’ve been in around McBride Mountain, where people live now. Barely livable.”

Her description piques my interest, and I push off the wall, narrowing my eyes on her before allowing my gaze to meet Liam’s, Connor’s, and Tony’s.

We know this mountain better than anyone—every resident, every property, every damn cabin.

Which means we have to know whoever was holding her.

Even Raven seems to have switched into full-on reporter mode, the intensity of her focus on Willow and every word she’s saying like a laser.

Dr. Bird keeps pushing her. “What did you smell?”

Willow clenches her eyes closed, taking a long inhalation. “Burning wood. A fire.”

“What did you hear?”

“Footsteps.”

I tense as if I can hear them, too. Anticipating what she’ll say next. What she might reveal. The identity of the monster who took her from me.

Who is the bastard, Honeybee?

“Someone’s saying the name ‘Bobby’ again.”

Who the fuck is Bobby?

Something tells me that name is important—essential to unraveling all of this.

Tony glances up from his notes to meet my gaze, raising a dark brow, asking if I know who she might be talking about. I shake my head. Unfortunately, the name doesn’t ring a bell.

Dr. Bird assesses Willow, giving her another moment to regain control of her breathing. “And can you see his face?”

She shakes her head. “No.”

“What does his voice sound like?”

“Low, rough, older.”

“And what did he say?”

Her body starts shaking, her hands moving to the armrests again, fingers curling around them. A sob slips from her mouth, so filled with anguish I feel it radiate through my own body. “Welcome home.”

The doctor glances at me. “You’re safe. Go back to your safe place. Remember where you were in the cabin with Killian in the chair.”

She shakes her head, her lips trembling. “I can’t.” Another sob rents the air. “I’m…” Her breaths shorten, punctuated by soul-crushing pain. “He’s…”

No.

My control snaps . “That’s enough!” I finally stalk away from the wall. “Get her out of it.”

Dr. Bird opens his mouth to argue, but one look at me and he shifts forward slightly in his seat toward her. “Willow, remember you’re safe, you’re warm, you’re comfortable. You’re in Killian’s arms in the cabin.”

I step closer to her, afraid to do anything that might hurt her while she’s still under hypnosis, but needing to help. Needing to do something.

The doctor motions for me that it’s okay to touch her, and I wrap my arms around her, dragging her up out of the chair and into my embrace.

Willow buries her face against my neck and sobs as I hold her, keeping her upright because her legs won’t do it on their own.

Dr. Bird continues to direct her. “Keep breathing in, out. In, out. And when you wake up, you’re going to remember everything that you told me, but you’ll feel safe.

There will be no panic. No more fear.” He watches us for a moment, allowing her to breathe deeply a few times. “Willow, open your eyes.”

They flutter open, and she tilts her head to look up at me, tears streaming down her face.

“I’m so sorry, Honeybee.” I swallow through the giant lump in my throat. “I’ve got you. You’re safe.”

She presses her cheek to my chest, and I exchange a look with the doctor.

Raven approaches from where she waited and rests her hand on Willow’s shoulder, rubbing it gently, whispering something I can’t hear.

I scowl at Dr. Bird. “I think we’re done for today.”

He nods, sliding his notebook into his bag and grabbing it from the floor. “You know how to get in touch with me if she wants to try again. Make sure she gets lots of rest tonight.”

Something tells me that won’t be happening.

Not now that she remembers.

It may not be everything.

But it’s enough.

He slips out of the office, leaving her trembling in my arms.

I tighten my grip on her. “Let me take you home, Honeybee.”

We can discuss all this later, when she’s up for it and ready to. I won’t force it now. Not when she’s so shaken.

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