Page 82 of Beg for It
When we got back to their place, the guys got me set up in front of the TV with popcorn and a drink. They left the room and moments later I heard yelling. I hated it and covered my ears so I didn’t have to listen.
My stomach was in knots, that's when the guilt amplified. I wanted to go in there and remind them why he kept my secret. But I was frozen by fear of saying something wrong and making things worse.
So I kept my mouth shut and they joined me a little while later like nothing happened.
The biggest adjustment has been being off my scent blockers. I stopped taking them that day.
And I’ve been a mess ever since. Waiting for my scent to bloom, for the guys to have a sniff and find out yet another life changing event.
They were understanding about me being an omega, but I don’t think they’re going to be about finding out I’m their scent match.
Because I haven’t only been lying to them, but lying to Lee also.
The idea of Lee hating me, feeling betrayed, makes me sick to my stomach. He’s been nothing but amazing to me about the whole situation with my dad and with me being an omega. Not only that, he’s lied to his pack, the men he loves, because I wasn’t ready to let them know.
And how do I repay him? By keeping secrets.
So many fucking secrets I can’t keep count. I need to come clean before this guilt eats me alive.
I’m just so fucking terrified to lose them.
How did I go from wishing they would leave me alone, disappear from my life, to the mere thought making me panic at losing them for good.
Now, I’m just getting out of one of my classes, not really sure what to do with the rest of my day. I don’t want to avoid the guys, it would be suspicious and honestly I just want to be near them.
They took the morning off school, something to do for work, so I’ve been on my own all morning.
Before, I’d have killed to have this much alone time without one of them stalking me. Now, I feel this absence I’m not fond of.
“Hey you.” I jump, heart pounding as Lee’s voice whispers in my ear. Spinning around, I turn my wide eyes on his. “Wow.” he chuckles. “What's got you all jumpy today?”
“N-nothing,” I stammer out, placing a hand on my pounding heart. “Just not feeling good.”
He nods his head. “Coming down from the suppressants?”
“Yeah,” I lie. “That must be it.” It’s not a total lie. I do feel different, more tired. But again, that could be because of the stress.
“I’ve missed you today,” he murmurs, pulling me into his arms.
I can’t help but melt into his touch, the warm feeling blanketing over me. “Sometimes, I hate my job.”
“No you don’t.” I manage to give him a genuine smile. “You love making people scream.”
“Oh, you know I do.” He wiggles his eyebrows and my cock twitches, my perfume bursting free. My eyes widen and Lee groans. “Fuck me, baby. I might not be an alpha, but your scent is so damn good. It’s got me rock fucking hard.” He rolls his hips, rubbing his erection against mine. “I think these meds have officially worn off.”
Fuck. No. Not now. I’m not ready.
“I need to use the bathroom,” I say quickly, slipping out of his arms and rushing towards the nearby bathroom.
Rushing into one of the stalls, I lock it and sit on the toilet. Putting my head in my hands, I take deep breaths while I try to think.
It’s now or never, Cam. Not that I really have a choice because the only way the guys won’t find out is if I could manage to slip away and take one of my suppressants.
I thought about it this morning, taking one while they were gone. I haven’t been left alone long enough before now to take them. River and Brooks have made sure I’ve been by their side at all times.
Even this morning, I knew they had a few of their guys on me. I might not have been able to see them, but I could feel them watching.
After a few minutes to catch my breath and my heart to calm down a bit, I open the stall door with shaking hands and go over to the sink.
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