Page 28 of A Loving Governess in Disguise

“Lydia! No. I covered for you the other day, but I’m not going to do it again.” Amelia tugged on her sister’s hand, trying to keep her from running out the door and straight to Captain Hargrave.

With a pout, Lydia stood in place, swishing her skirts back and forth like an innocent child. The look in her eyes was anything but innocent. There was something lingering there—like a woman caught up in a fantastical romance.

Or perhaps what she thought it would be like based on the novels she liked to read.

Lydia smiled and reached out to chuck Amelia under the chin. “One day, you’ll understand, but Captain Hargrave is nothing but a family friend. We’re talking about his travels and the work he’s been doing since the war, nothing more. And Esther has been watching us if Mama and Papa aren’t around.”

“And what of the rumors of his drinking and gambling? Even being friends with a man like that would ruin you to some degree. And you know Papa disapproves of him.”

“Papa is an old man. Drinking and playing card games is for the young men, so it’s not a surprise he looks down on it, and there’s nothing wrong with a little fun.” Lydia sniffed and looked out the window, watching as the captain swung down from his horse. “And the rumors are nothing more than gossip spread by people who are jealous of the success he’s had.”

What success? She wanted to scream, but she knew it would be no use.

Lydia was as stubborn as an ox, if not more so. She wouldn’t be moved.

Maybe she’s right, and this is nothing more than a friendship.

Lydia glanced at Captain Hargrave again, the look between them stretching longer than necessary. “I must go. You’ll tell Mama that I’m out for a walk, won’t you?”

“What else would I tell her?” Amelia asked, more to herself than her sister since she knew Lydia was listening.

“You’re the best.” Lydia smirked and turned, stalking out of the house with Esther trailing behind her.

Amelia sighed and leaned against the wall, tipping her head back. She wanted what was best for Lydia, but somehow, this didn’t seem like it.

“Amelia, what are you doing standing there when there is a wedding to finish preparing for?” Mama came around the corner, clapping her hands together. “Go out there and speak to the gardener about the arrangements for me. I have to speak with the chef.”

“Mama—”

“Not now, Amelia. There is much to do, and we have to make sure everything is perfect for your sister.” Mama pointed toward the door.

Amelia bit the inside of her cheek before letting out a deep breath. She walked out the door and into the garden, looking at the flowers that would be gone tomorrow morning. The roses would be trimmed and stuffed into dramatic vases, lining the aisle that Lydia would walk down.

“Miss Amelia,” the gardener said with a warm smile, dusting his hands off on his jacket. “I didn’t think I would be seeing you today. With everything going on, I thought there wouldn’t be much time for your daily walk.”

“And if I did not take it, with everything going on in that house, my head would explode.” Amelia smiled and tucked her hands into her pockets as she walked with the gardener. “Mama wanted to make sure that the arrangements would be beautiful.”

“They will be. The roses will be paired with lilies in the white vases with the gold and pink paintings.”

Amelia nodded. “And will there be some flowers left on the bushes as well?”

“There should be. I’ve contacted a few of the surrounding estates and they’re going to send flowers along as well. It’s costing a bit more, but your mother made it abundantly clear that she didn’t want the bushes fully trimmed either.”

A slight giggle came from the arbor close to Amelia and the gardener as they walked. Amelia’s cheeks flushed, and her mind started to spin. She needed to get the gardener out of there. She didn’t know what was happening in the arbor, but when she saw a flash of her sister’s skirts, she was sure it wasn’t good.

“Would you mind fetching one of the vases and whipping up an arrangement? Just so I can tell Mama that I’ve seen it and can assure her of how talented you are?”

“You’re flattering me because you know you’re making more work for me.” A warm smile was flashed Amelia’s way. “I wouldn’t do it for anyone else, but for you, I’d be happy to.”

“Thank you.” Amelia stiffened as another giggle came from the arbor. “I’ll meet you in the greenhouse shortly. I’ll need to grab a sketchbook so I can make a quick drawing to show Mama when she asks.”

Amelia pretended to walk away, hiding around the corner of a large bush until the gardener was gone. As soon as she was sure the coast was clear, she hurried back to the arbor.

There, beneath the vines trailing up the metal structure, were Lydia and Captain Hargrave.

And just as Amelia was about to interrupt them, Lydia stretched up on her toes and kissed Captain Hargrave. His hands were on her lower back, and he held her close.

Amelia stepped back around the side, staying hidden from sight, waiting for them to part.

What do I do?

There was no way that she could tell her family. The marriage between Lydia and Lord Ashford would be called off. Their family’s reputation would be ruined.

And for what?

This couldn’t have been more than a momentary lapse in judgment from Lydia. It didn’t have to ruin the rest of her life.

Amelia would just take the secret to her grave.

***

Lydia snuck into Amelia’s room late that night with a single candle, wearing her hair loose with her white nightgown flowing around her. With flushed cheeks, she set the candle on the bedside table before sitting on the edge of the bed.

Amelia sat up in bed and pulled her knees to her chest. “What is it? Is everything all right?”

“Lord Ashford arrives in the morning.” Lydia let out a slow, deep breath. “Do you think it’s normal to be scared before your wedding? I know he loves me, but there’s something that seems so serious about walking down the aisle. It’s like once I do this, I’ll be married and have a new family.”

“You’re never going to lose us.” Amelia patted the bed beside her, and Lydia shifted, snuggling up against the pillows and nestling her head on Amelia’s shoulder. “I will be with you no matter what. We can write endless letters.”

“But what if I’ve made the wrong decision?”

Amelia wrapped her arm around her sister, holding her close. “I think it’s only natural. In the books I’ve read, women sometimes have doubts, but there’s this feeling deep within them that lets them know they can do it. That the man they’re marrying is the man they want to be with.”

Lydia pulled her bottom lip into her mouth. “I don’t understand how.”

“I think it comes from the faith that God has a plan for each one of us. What I think makes people the most nervous—at least from my understanding—is that this is a big shift in your life. Looking at your future is difficult, and with marriage comes deciding what kind of person you want to be.”

“That doesn’t help this tight feeling right here,” Lydia said, swirling her hand around in front of her lower stomach. “I want this to be right.”

“It will be. Come the morning, we’re going to wake up and welcome Lord Ashford and his friends, and everything will be good, and you’ll be happy.”

Lydia let out another deep breath and nodded. “Can I stay with you tonight? It’s the last time we can spend the night together before I’m wed and too far away to.”

“Of course.” Amelia shifted more to the side, waiting while Lydia nestled under the blanket.

For a moment, they were nothing more than young children again, , seeking comfort in each other when the trials of life got to be too much for either of them.

Amelia wished that it would stay this way forever, but in the morning, everything would change.

***

Henry glanced out through the window as the carriage rolled down the bumpy road. “I dare say we should be there soon if the weather stays this pleasant.”

William shrugged, crossing his arms over his chest and closing his eyes. “We’ve been traveling for over a day and a half already. It can’t be much longer.”

“It’s not, and when we get there, you will meet Miss Amelia Fairfax.”

“I’ve seen her at the balls. She is rather pretty, but she is young, and she seems to have her head up in the clouds. More than once, she’s been seen tucked away in a drawing room with a book in her lap.”

“Have you considered that a quiet woman would suit you well?”

“Have you considered that just because you long to live in wedded bliss doesn’t mean that I do?” William glanced out the window at the countryside rolling by. “I don’t think there is anything wrong with marriage if that’s what you desire, but it’s not the life I want for myself.”

“At least agree to be pleasant to her when you do meet her. She is a lovely girl, even if her head is a bit up in space at times. She has the most wonderful voice when she accompanies her own playing. Quite talented in that regard as well.”

“How many more times must I tell you that I don’t wish to marry her?” William scrubbed a hand over his face. “I will be perfectly pleasant to her, but I do not have the time or tolerance for a woman with her head in the clouds, and neither do you. Why you would suggest her as a potential match is beyond absurd in the first place.”

Henry crossed one leg over the other at the ankle. “She is pleasant enough, and if nothing else, the two of you can become friends while we’re on this trip.”

“Friends I can manage.” William gave him a satisfied bob of his head. “Are you ready for the wedding?”

“I should think I am. I have everything I need. Tomorrow will be the eve of the wedding and then after that, the wedding day will be here. After that I shall be taking Lydia to my home.”

“And we shall have to run behind the carriage,” William said, cutting a glance over to Jacob.

Jacob cracked a smile, his eyes still closed as if he was caught on the edge of waking up and going back to sleep. “If that is to be the case, then I would rather get out now and start walking home.”

Henry looked between the two of them before tipping his head back. “I do not know how to get through the next few days with either of you, but I will do it.”

“Unfortunate,” William muttered under his breath.

Henry pretended not to hear him. William would never be a fan of the idea of marriage, and though that was fine with Henry, he didn’t want the excitement of the day ruined for himself.

The closer the wedding day came, the happier he was.

In a mere day and a half, he would begin his life with Lydia.

He glanced out the window, looking at the blue sky and the birds flitting by, landing in trees in their breeding pairs.

Yes, it was the perfect start to a marriage.