Page 71

LOVE AND OWNERSHIP

By the time Aunt Adelaide’s arrival was announced, I felt quite mad. A night of fitful sleep lay behind me, filled with dreams of drowning, of Azriel laughing at me, mere inches above my face, the sheer pane of water separating us. Now, with my aunt waiting downstairs and the maid looking at me with mild concern on her face, my hands shook and my throat was dry.

In my state of near-insanity, I almost longed for Azriel’s presence, some sort of buffer, someone to lean on in the face of my aunt’s fury. With him by my side, at least I would not be alone.

A ridiculous notion.

Azriel could have his arms around me and I would still be alone. He had proven as much the previous night. Instead, I squared my shoulders and went to the drawing room, awaiting the throwing open of doors and the mad flurry of my aunt to descend into the room.

She did not disappoint.

Her face was twisted into an expression I had never before seen on her sweet, round face. Her cheeks were firered, her eyes narrowed, her mouth set in such a firm, white line, her lips had completely disappeared.

The door was slammed back against the wall, the harried maid shaking her head with wide eyes as she rushed in behind my aunt.

“I’m sorry, madam, I-”

Aunt Adelaide rounded on the poor girl, her finger darting in the direction of the hall. “Leave us!” Her voice dripped with sheer poison, and the girl wheeled backwards instantly, barely a squeak of acquiescence before the door was slammed in her face.

Aunt Adelaide spun back to face me, and I noticed now how disheveled her clothing was, her bonnet on an angle upon her wild hair. She had truly come to London in a hurry, and I wondered what hell the poor staff aboard the coach had been put through on her journey.

“Aunt Adelaide.” I gave her a tight smile, and walked towards her. “It is so lovely to see you.”

“Do not play the innocent lady with me, my girl.” She looked about the room theatrically, tapping her foot. “And? Where is the cad?”

“My husband is not here.”

Aunt Adelaide scoffed, throwing her hands in the air. “Of course, the coward can’t even face me!”

“It is at my request that he is not here, Aunt. I felt it better we talk alone.” I gestured to the chaise, but she ignored me, staunchly holding her place at the door.

“Do you have any idea what you’ve done, Evangeline? What a state your father is in?”

I, too, remained standing, determined to keep a level eye with her. “It is regrettable that my marriage has caused such an uproar, Aunt Adelaide, but I am sure that, in time-”

“No.” The word was short and sharp, carrying with it all the enmity of my family. “There will be noin time, my girl.”

“There must be, for what is done, is done, and you must accept it.”

“I must do no such thing.” Aunt Adelaide took two steps towards me, coming to a sharp stop, as though fearing that being in too close proximity to me would have my sin burning her just as it had me. “I was there, when your mother died, I saw your father in the deepest depths of grief and despair. And I can assure you, that pales in comparison to how he finds himself at this moment. He is completely distraught. To hear his only child has become a fallen woman? That she has eloped with not just the greatest womaniser London has ever seen, but her own stepson no less? All while she is in mourning? A mourning that came to pass mere weeks ago!”

“You must all know that we did not plan this.”

“I should certainly hope not!” Adelaide shook her head, aghast. “For what kind of person could even conceive of planning something like this?”

“Aunt Adelaide, please, you must understand, the situation is not as simple as you think.”

“No, it is very clearly as simple as I think.” She raised an eyebrow, looking me up and down. “My naive niece was drawn in by the handsome philanderer, wooed by sinful pleasures of the flesh, and threw herself at the feet of the devil himself.”

Humiliated tears stung my eyes, but I blinked them back quickly. “That is a cruel thing to say.”

“Well, I beg your pardon if you expected me to come here and be kind to you. You will not find me so.” She sneered at me, her hands on her hips. “Oh no, do not tell me that you truly love the boy.”

“He is not a boy, and yes.” My tongue was heavy as I lied. “I do love him. I love him more than I ever thought possible.”

“Patently outrageous.” She jabbed her finger into her openpalm. “This here, what is going on in this house, it is a sin, and I will not stand for it, Evangeline. None of us will.”

“You have no choice but to stand for it, for Acton left me nothing.” The words spilled out of me, dredged in hopelessness and anger. “Nothing. Do you understand?”