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“I am positively terrified.” He kissed my shoulder again, and again. “Have you thought of a name?”

“I quite like Hannah.”

“Hannah Caine?” Azriel laughed. “Sounds rather like Hurricane, should we just call her that instead?”

“Oh, you are a foul ratbag.” I chuckled as I sat up, stretching my back, and turning to face him. “What names do you like?”

“I don’t know. I’m quite partial to Esmerelda.”

My eyebrows shot up. “After your mother?”

He sat up, leaning against the headboard with a shrug. “Feels like a rather nice homage to her.”

“Yes, it does. And Esmerelda Caine does sound very pretty.” I gazed back out the window, as the snowfall became lighter, and the last dying fingers of sunlight brushed against the curtains. “And if it is a boy? What shall we name him then?”

“Theodore?” Azriel mused, scratching his cheek with his thumb. “I quite like that name.”

“Ooh, I do like that. It’s a good, strong name.”

“I assumed you would not want him named after your father.” Azriel eyed me apologetically. “Sorry, I did not mean that to sound insensitive.”

I shook my head, swallowing hard and running a hand over my belly as the baby continued to do somersaults. “No,not at all. I would not want my son named after a man who does not deserve such an honour.”

It had not even occurred to me to name my son after my father. I had, in fact, barely thought of him at all since his death, almost two years ago. Shortly after our arrival in America, when our beautiful townhouse had been ready and waiting for us, a letter had arrived, from Rebecca. The new co-owner of Madame Lillian’s (Rebecca had come into some money from a mysterious benefactor shortly before our departure) had informed us that Lady de la Croix had indeed begun her work of besmirching our reputation. Rebecca and the other good ladies of the salon had set about ruining de la Croix posthumously, spreading the news of his exploits in Stepney far and wide. Within weeks, Lady de la Croix was laughed out of society, threatened with the madhouse, and was forced to flee London and return home to her family.

But this did not stop her gossip reaching my father’s ears, and the shock that his daughter could have conspired with her stepson to murder her husband made his heart give out. A letter written in my aunt’s furious hand arrived at our new home, and she said that she blamed Azriel and I for her beloved brother’s death. We were not to return to England, ever.

Azriel had promptly tossed the letter into the fire.

“I did not mean to make you sad,” Azriel said, sliding across the bed to sit beside me. “You were just so happy.”

I took his hand and gave him a smile. “You didn’t. I was merely thinking about… everything. And how happy I am. We have this beautiful home, friends who adore us, and come Spring, a beautiful baby to call our own.”

He lowered his eyes to my belly, and smiled. “Indeed we do. Our long-awaited arrival.” His eyes darted back to mine, and an uncertain laugh left his lips. “Would you think less ofme if I told you that for the longest time, I worried that perhaps it had been me who had been the problem?”

I frowned at him, shaking my head. “Whatever do you mean?”

“Well, the men in my family do not exactly exude fertility, and… Well…” He broke off, his cheeks flushing slightly. “I worried that perhaps I was unable to father a child. My father only managed me, and well, look how I turned out.”

“Stop that this instant.” I attempted to straddle him, but with my belly in the way I could not get chest-to-chest with him as I wanted, instead balancing on his thighs as his hands held my hips steady. “Do you think I could love a soul that did not mirror my own?”

“As dark as each other, ey?”

“I will remind you that murder is not beneath me.”

Azriel burst out laughing, shaking his head as he gazed up at me. “Careful now, Mary might overhear and then the ruse is up and we shall be ruined once more.”

“Mary and Gertie are probably on their seventh round of the neighbourhood.” I lay my hands around him, craning my neck to plant a kiss on his lips. “And you, my darling, must stop doubting yourself. I would not change you for the world. Not for anything.”

“Neither would I.” He ran a hand over my belly with a sad smile. “And yet still, I was fearful. I wanted so much… I never knew how much I wanted this with you, until I feared that it would not happen.”

“But it has happened, and I know that you will be the most wonderful father.”

“I am sure I will not know the first thing about being a father.” He looked up at me with his beautiful icy eyes, searching my face with a smile that now warmed from sad to hopeful. “But I know that I shall try, just as I do with you,every day. I will love you both, and I will try every day to be the man you both deserve.”

“You do not need to try and deserve me when you have done so a million times over.”

“I am still not a good man, Evie.”

I silenced him with a kiss, and he chuckled against my lips. “I do not need you to be good, Azriel. I just need you to be mine.”

His eyes still closed, he put a hand over mine, and smiled. “And that I am, beloved. Forever.”