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“Lexie, look at me.”

Slowly, my gaze rises to his, my stomach a knotting bundle of nerves.

“I promise it’s worth it.”

As soon as we step inside, Jesse jumps from the couch. “You two okay? I can put on a pot of coffee.”

He walks over and kisses her on the cheek. “We’re good. I think I’m going to hit the hay.”

She worries at her bottom lip before turning her attention to me.

“I’m pooped, too. No coffee for me. I’ll see you guys in the morning.”

But sleep evades me as soon as I lie down. I’m confused by the connection I’ve made with Raffe. I’ve never had anyone share something so personal with me before tonight. He didn’t hide his pain from me. He let me see it and him.

I’d be lying to myself if I said I didn’t feel connections with other members of the club too. JD and Elizabeth. Dan and Lily. Jesse and Dirk. Even Petey and Katie. I was scared to put my trust in them. My parents conditioned me to never get my hopes up. That relationships are fleeting.

I get that nothing in this world is mine to hold forever. My conversation with Raffe tonight proves that.

Please, please just give me something I can hold on to … even if it’s just for a short while.

Chapter Sixteen

Ash

My normally steady hands tremble as I pull a letter with my name on it from under the mat. I give the coffee one last glance, making sure it won’t spill on the new phone I purchased for her yesterday. A light comes on in the kitchen, and I quickly press myself alongside the house before quietly fading into the morning fog.

As I’m slipping into the forest, Dirk calls my name. I pause, becoming the silence. Becoming invisible.

“I know you’re out there. We’ve got a situation!” he yells, cupping his mouth.

This has me jogging in his direction. When I reach him, my adrenaline spikes. Dirk is shaken. Something I’ve never personally witnessed. Instantly, I prepare myself for go-mode.

“What happened?”

He grabs my arm and guides me away from the house a few steps. “Jesse, Raffe, and I are leaving.”

I scan the area waiting for further explanation.

“We have a family matter to handle.” He rubs his temples. “Lexie is asleep upstairs. We’re going to wake her up here in a bit. We don’t want to leave without saying goodbye.”

“You’re leaving her here alone?”

His crazy-colored eyes narrow on me. “We’re leaving her with you.”

“What about the party?” I ask him.

“Fuck the party. We’ll postpone. Raffe needs help with something. We think Lexie’s in a good place right now, but she needs a little more time and separation from the world she’s leaving behind. So, you’re up. This is your shot.”

I’m at a loss for words. This is all so sudden. I look at the letter in my hand. “Yeah, okay, but JD said …”

He cuts me off. “I’ll talk to JD. You take her home when you think she’s ready.”

“Rules?”

His eyebrow rises high. “You make your own. But don’t forget she’s not just yours anymore. She’s part of the family now. She might not have had any parents when she got out here, but when she leaves she’s going to have several sets.”

I rub my hand over the back of my head. “I love you guys for that.”