Page 111 of Total Shutdown

“Yeah,” I reply, emotion turning my voice hoarse.

He taps my shoulder and turns to walk away.

I grab him by the upper arm this time, stopping him in his tracks. “Hey.”

His eyes wear a foreign gloss to them. “Yeah.”

“Thank you,” I say, never anticipating I’d share a moment like this with my crazy-ass goalie.

Apparently, this guy has more layers than I gave him credit for. Or perhaps that’s how he likes to portray himself. Either way, I’m grateful because I needed the check-in. Someone needed to ground me before I burst into Ezra’s room, doing exactly what Archer told me I couldn’t.

“You’re welcome,” he replies, the sheen across his blue eyes growing more obvious. He blinks rapidly, attempting to push down his emotion. “Now, go see your family.”

“Sawyer!” Collins leaps to her feet the moment I push through the door to Ezra’s private treatment room.

She rounds Ezra’s bed and throws her arms around my neck, and I immediately feel the tremble in her body.

I pull her close, desperate to let her know it’s okay and if she is blaming herself in any way, she absolutely shouldn’t.

“Hey, Baby Girl.” My voice is calm and quiet, exactly how I want it to be right now.

Her face is free of makeup, and when she unwraps her arms from around my neck, I see the black staining the cuff of the jersey I gave her to wear tonight. She’s been wiping at her eyes, and my heart breaks because I know she’s been crying without me to comfort her.

She cocks her head toward Ezra’s bed. “He’s sleeping. They gave him some pain relief for the stitches on his left knee.”

Despite my best efforts, the adrenaline kicks up, and I push a shaking hand through my unwashed hair. “He needed stitches?”

A tear falls from her right eye, and I reach up and swipe at her cheek.

“Not many, and it wasn’t serious. The doctor wanted to be sure any risk of infection was reduced, and this way, the healing process will be faster. They’re dissolvable too. I offered to hold his hand, but he said that wasn’t cool. Once it was over, he wanted me to take a picture for him to show his friends at school. He said it willup his statuson campus.” She chuckles, but I can tell it’s more out of awe for Ezra’s bravery than it is humor.

I laugh quietly, finding a sense of relief in her words. “What else did the doctors say? How did it happen?”

I stop myself from asking why he was on the bike in the first place. This isn’t her fault. Last time he rode a bike with a friend, she had made the dangers one hundred percent clear to him.

She drops her head to the floor, guilt flowing from her in waves.

“No, don’t do that. Look at me, Baby Girl.” I tip her chin up and demand her attention.

I’m not allowing her brain to go there.

No fucking way.

Collins swallows thickly, eyes flicking to my son as he sleeps peacefully and then back to mine. “He told me that he, Nate, and some other boys finished up on a Fortnite battle when one of them got a text from a kid named Brett, who is several years older than Ezra but they know each other through playing video games. He asked if they wanted to meet them at the arcade. Allegedly, they all snuck out of the house when Nate’s mom, Imogen, wasn’t looking.”

“Jesus, she must’ve been going out of her mind when she couldn’t find them.”

Collins shakes her head. “That’s the thing. They’d had dinner, and she assumed they were all hunkered down for the night in Nate’s room, gaming. That’s where she last saw them. She didn’t realize what had happened until Nate called her at the same time Ezra phoned me.”

She bites down on her bottom lip, stressed and overwhelmed.

I lean in and kiss her, brushing my lips softly over hers. Sometimes, words aren’t enough, and this is one of the moments—she needs to feel that none of this is on her.

Pulling back, she starts talking again. “Anyway, when they got to the arcade, Carter—who I told you about the last time …”

She trails off, and I nod in understanding.

“He was there and offered to give Ezra another ride on his bike. When he was admitted, he was wearing a leather jacket and gloves. Both were too big for him since they belonged to one of Carter’s friends. Supposedly, Ezra refused to ride unless he lent them to him, along with his helmet. He said his ‘stepmom is an expert biker, and that’s the only way to ride.’” Something like pride fills her face, color flushing her previously pale complexion.