Page 44

Story: Tied up in Knots

“Here I am.”

I hold out my arms and she steps forward to embrace me, squeezing tight. I hug her back and enjoy the smell and feel of her. Her and Bambi are home to me. I don’t know why it took me so long to figure that out.

“I’m glad you’re back, honey. I always knew you would be.” She pats my chest and steps back to give me a once over head to toe. “I wasn’t sure how long it would take, but I’m glad it didn’t take long. Let’s go inside and I’ll make you something to eat. You look hungry.”

She always says that, but this time I actually am pretty hungry. I haven’t eaten much today. I was so distracted with getting back and finding Bambi, food wasn’t important.

As if in agreement my stomach growls and we both look at it and laugh.

Inside the house nothing has changed, I supposed not much would in six months.Other than one of my best friends carrying my baby. That’s a pretty big change.But the dining table is where it always has been, the handmade seat cushions still tied to the wooden bars with bows. Knitted Afghans drape over the back of the couch, and a small fire is crackling in thewood burning stove in the corner, some home and garden show playing quietly on the TV.

It's weird the things you miss when you leave the place you consider home. I didn’t realize how at peace I felt right here in this house. I always thought my peace was out on the water away from this town.

Gigi gestures for me to sit at the table and begins meddling around in the kitchen, pulling a covered casserole dish from the fridge and scooping some of its contents onto a plate. It looks like her famous lasagna and my mouth waters just thinking about eating it.

I’ve had my fair share of amazing foods while traveling the seas, but nothing compares to a home cooked meal. Whoever said love wasn’t a real ingredient was lying. Everything tastes better when it’s made with love.

Love. Fuck I’m so stupid. It was right here in front of me the whole fucking time and I just left it. Ran away and made up some sorry ass excuse about finding happiness or some bullshit. I guess that saying ‘the grass is always greener on the other side’ is a saying for a reason. Things always look better to us when we don’t have them, it’s only in receiving them do we see the truth of it.

Gigi hums a tune so familiar it feels as if I’m a kid again, while she reheats the plate of food and pours me a tall glass of milk to go with it. I think to Gigi, I am still a kid, even though I’ve towered over her for years. She sets down the plate and glass in front of me and hands me a fork.

“There you are sweetheart. Nice home cooked meal to fill you up. Bet you missed my cooking when you left, didn’t you?” She sits in the seat next to me at her wooden round dining table. She always said she liked round tables over square ones because they equally included everyone into the meal and conversation.

“You know I did Gigi. No one cooks like you do.”

I cut off a hefty bite and shovel the blend of pasta, meat and cheese into my mouth and moan in appreciation when the warm deliciousness hits my taste buds.

“Now that you’re here, perhaps you can tell me why it took you so long to come home? Raelyn’s nearly into her third trimester by now and you just figured it out?”

Well shit. That answers that question. I finish chewing and swallow, clearing my throat with a swig of ice-cold milk.

“I would have been back sooner, but I had no idea about her pregnancy. Not until Owen told me, and as soon as he did, I headed home.”

The corner of her lips pulls upward at my answer, approving of my actions. At least I’ll have Gigi on my side to back me up with Bambi. I take another bite of food before she can distract me with another question. I am freaking hungry, and I will not miss out on Gigi’s lasagna.

“I knew she was wrong about you.”

“What?” I look up at Gigi and speak around the food in my mouth.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” she scolds, and I instantly snap my mouth shut and finish chewing.

“What do you mean she was wrong about me?” I ask once I’m no longer chewing.

“Raelyn always thought you would never change your mind about leaving. She always believed that being out on the ocean and outside of Alaska was what would make you happy. She just couldn’t see you like I do.”

She smiles at me and pats my hand on the table, holding it in her wrinkled but warm and strong one. You can’t be weak and live in Alaska, everyone here has to be strong of body and mind.

She continues before I can ask something stupid. “I knew once you realized what you had left behind, realized what trulymade you happy, you would be back. Because what makes you happy is Raelyn.”

Is this woman some sort of psychic and I didn’t know about it? Because I didn’t even know Bambi is what made me happy until now. How could she have known all along?

I must make a face again, because she chuckles. “It was easy to see when watching you two. You both thought you were so sly, sneaking glances at one another when no one else was looking. Having a pet name for her you wouldn’t allow anyone else to use. It was so obvious to me.”

Okay now I know she’s psychic because I didn’t even ask the question, and she answered it. I raise an eyebrow at her suspiciously and she just laughs.

“Children are so oblivious. I’m just glad you finally saw what I see. That you finally found each other.”

“I’m still figuring it out, but I’m realizing a few things, being back home. Bambi’s not going to make it easy for me.” I let out a breathy chuckle.