Page 29

Story: Tied up in Knots

“No, I’m fine, thanks. I think I’ll just go lay down for the rest of the day. You okay here alone?”

She waves her hands towards the front of the store, “I think I’ll be fine, it’s pretty quiet out there.”

“Great. Thanks.”

I press past her and make my way up the stairs to my apartment, not giving Lauren time to realize I was probably making the same face her sister was when she realized she was pregnant.

Pregnant. Fuck.

That’s weird to consider. I had never thought much about it. Especially since I was never with a guy long enough to considerthe long-term marriage and family thing. Now? What the hell am I going to do if I am? What am I going to tell people? Izzy, Gigi? None of them know about Warren. Would they even believe me if I told them the truth? Probably not. Should I tell Warren? If everyone in town finds out, it’ll be nonstop gossip forever. Even after the baby’s born and grown they’ll comment about how its father left and never came back and didn’t care about them or love them enough to stay. It’ll be horrible.

I plop down onto my couch and bend to put my head between my knees, running my fingers through my hair so much my ponytail slips free.

If I tell Warren about the pregnancy, he’ll probably come back. I can’t do that to him. He’ll feel obligated and that’s the last thing I want. He doesn’t want a life here, doesn’t want to settle down with kids, let alone in the town he hates so much. This would literally ruin his life.

A panic starts to fill my chest, and it feels like I’m being strangled.Okay chill out, first things first.Let’s find out if I actually am pregnant.Which means I need to get a pregnancy test. Which will also be gossiped about when someone sees what I’m buying. Because why would I be buying a pregnancy test when I’m single and_to their knowledge_have been for years?

This is going to blow up in my face before I even know if it’s true or not.

Izzy. I can ask Izzy to get me the test. No one would question her since she has a fiancé, and it wouldn’t be weird. And if anyone asks her, she can just say it was negative. No harm no foul. Right?

I really hope she’ll do it for me. Even if she does, I’ll have to explain why I need it and who the father is. I’ll either have to tell the truth or come up with a lie that won’t garner many questions. What would she believe? A one-night stand? Not really my style but not completely unbelievable either.

Suck it up Raelyn, you’re an adult, Izzy is an adult and your best friend. It’ll be fine. Just text her.

Sitting up slowly I lean back on the couch and pull my cell phone from the front chest pocket of my overalls, black suede with gold buckles, and type out a text to Izzy.

Thirty minutes later Izzy is bursting through my front door, plastic grocery bag in hand and talking a mile a minute.

“Okay so I got three different brands just in case. You can never be too sure with these things. False positives are a real thing, and we don’t want to panic until we know we need to.”

“I’m not panicking.”

“Not yet. We’ll see how well you’re doing once the results show up.”

She has a point. Plus, I’m obviously panicking. Just the idea of being pregnant has me freaking the fuck out.

“Alright. Have you been drinking water? We have a lot of sticks to pee on.”

“Yes, I’ve been chugging it down since I texted you.”

Izzy arranges the boxes on the kitchen counter, each stick next to its corresponding box and instructions so we know how to read the results. There’s one that makes a blue plus sign, onewould be two pink lines and the third literally says the word pregnant if positive.

“I think I’ll start with this one.” I grab the test and shakily read the instructions.

Pretty basic stuff. Just pee on the stick or dip it in a cup of pee and wait three minutes for the result. Easy enough. At least the testing part. It’s the part that comes after that is difficult.

“I’ll be right here when you’re done.” Izzy grips my arm and gives me a reassuring smile. I nod and try to smile but I’m too nervous. I step into the bathroom and start peeing on sticks.

~

Pregnant, plus sign and two pink lines. Every single test is positive.

“I’m pregnant.”

The admission is a mere whisper from my lips. The words foreign to my ears.How am I going to tell Gigi?She’s going to be so disappointed in me.

Izzy scoots closer to me on the couch, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.