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I’ve always been a little off kilter and weird. Nothing ever matches, I never do anything different with my hair, I have far too many pairs of overalls, my home looks like a secondhand store and I ride a tricycle around town. Sometimes I wish I could be more like Izzy, organized, fashionable, sociable. Maybe then Warren would have stayed, or better yet, asked me out years ago and never even planned to leave. As it is, I can’t change the past until they discover time travel. Which I’m sure is pretty far off, so I just have to live the life I’m given…and hope Warren is true to his word.

“The father…is…” When I don’t continue Izzy raises her brows and shakes her head in a ‘go ahead’ gesture.

“Warren.”

Silence, dead fucking silence.

“Warren?” she finally says.

“Yup.”

“As in Warren Graham, our friend of fifteen years and my brother’s best friend, Warren?”

“Yup, the very same.”

“I…You?..He? How? When?”

I think I’ve broken my best friend because she can’t seem to form a whole sentence, but I speak Izzy-a-nese.

“The week before he left, I admitted I had feelings for him. Apparently, they were mutual and we hooked up, then he left. Then I found out about being pregnant.”

Izzy’s eyes are practically bugging out of her head and her mouth drops open in shock, her tea completely forgotten.

“Did you tell him? Has he been skirting his responsibilities as a father this entire time? Do I need to hunt his ass down and drag him home by his balls?” Izzy progressively gets angrier and more protective with each revelation, and I love her a little bit more for it.

I hold a hand up to stop her from standing and running out the door to do just that. “No, no. I didn’t tell him, and he didn’t know.”

“Didn’t or doesn’t? Does he know now?”

“That’s kind of why I’m admitting it to you now. I was never going to. I was just going to pretend like I didn’t know the father and raise the baby on my own. But…”

“But what?”

I sigh and just get it over with. The hard part is over after all. Admitting he’s the father and that we had a rather vivacious sexual relationship_no matter how short lived_was the embarrassing part. The next bit is just informative.

“Warren’s back.”

Her brow furrows and she cocks her head to the side slightly. “Back? As in back in town?”

“Yeah. He just appeared at the shop today and nearly gave me a heart attack. Owen had told him about my pregnancy, and he connected the dots on his own.”

“So, he’s here in Homer? Like right now?”

“Yup.”

Izzy’s mug clinks quietly on the coaster as she sets it down, finally realizing she’s still holding it. Leaning back, she pokes her cheek with her tongue, her thinking face. Then she turns to me, determination setting in, I know she’s formulated at least three plans in those thirty seconds.

“Okay. So, what do you want to do? Are we just accepting him back, are we keeping him away? I can do whatever you wantHun. I’ll welcome him with open arms or kick him in the balls, either one is fine with me.”

I laugh and it feels good to finally have it out there, and to not be judged for it.

I take her questions into consideration. And truthfully, I’m not sure what to do.

“Well, he says he’s staying. I’m not sure I believe him.”

“Nor should you after all the years of him plotting to leave.”

I give her a soft smile of gratitude and continue. “But Iwantto believe him. I think I’d like to give him the opportunity to prove himself. I still have feelings for him, and if he really wants to be part of our lives because he loves me and wants to be here, and doesn't just stay out of obligation, then I want to give it a chance. But if his heart isn’t in it…”