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What the fuck made me go in that cupboard anyway? Why do I always have to play with fire?

I’ve never envied my brother Luke his happily ever after more. Getting back with the childhood crush he pined over for years seemed like all his dreams came true. The kind of thing that happens to guys like Luke, but not to me.

And for good reason.

Luke’s always been the easy-going mender. Mending arguments and smoothing over things in our family.

And what was he always smoothing over? Nine times out of ten, it was the trouble I caused. Because as much as Luke’s always been the good boy, I was the troublemaker.

Always was. Always will be.

I sling a leg over the bike and kick the engine into gear regardless of the late hour and the neighbors. Let them go have a word with my parents tomorrow. It wouldn’t be the first time.

Living in a small town sucks the fun out of life. There’s always someone to complain about every move you make. Every time you scratch yourself.

Not a single one of them really gets it.

Not a single one would stop to think about how my parents bent over backward to fit in here. They don’t give a toss. They’re all too busy squabbling over petty traffic infringements or the fact that the council might let that chain open their store in the center of town.

Well who cares?

They can go to hell just as soon as I’ve used them all as my stepping stones to a way out of this dead-end town and on to a better life.

FIVE

Olivia

I give up on sleep somewhere around three in the morning. I toss the pillow I had flung over my eyes onto the floor and click on the bedside lamp. The sky outside my window is still pitch black. I can’t blame jetlag. Despite the fact it’s morning back home, I adjusted to the time difference over a week ago.

It’s morning and Justin still hasn’t called or messaged back.

A swell of acrid tension rises in my belly as I replay the last twenty-four hours in my mind all over again. It’s beenhappening on repeat ever since I rushed from The Snapper and back to my room hardly knowing what to do.

With shaking hands I pick up my phone from the nightstand and dial.

He answers.

It rang so many times I think it’s his voicemail at first. And then he speaks. “Olivia, I wasn’t expecting to hear from you so early. I thought it was still nighttime in Australia.”

A little of the sick feeling subsides when I realize he must have been thinking about me to have considered what time it was for me. Perhaps all my stupid worries have been for nothing. Perhaps something really did come up for him at work.

My voice cracks with emotion when I try to reply. “J-Justin. Hi! I’m so glad I caught you. I’ve been missing you.” Another knot twists in my throat, and I have to press my lips together or else give in to it. He hates it when I cry.

“Oh come on, Liv. It’s only been a couple weeks. Haven’t you been having a good time?”

“Yes, but I still miss you.”

There’s a long pause. It’s so long I lift the phone from my ear to check that reception hasn’t cut out.

Justin clears his throat. “Listen, Liv. We probably need to talk. I was gonna wait until you got back, but maybe now is a good time after all.”

Oh god. Do we ever! I don’t think I’ll get another wink of sleep until I’ve confessed to him. Suddenly I can’t wait another moment. Whatever he has to tell me, it couldn’t possibly be as bad. “There’s something I have to tell you,” I say suddenly.

“Oh?”

“You’re gonna be mad. I know you will. I just need you to know that I love you, OK?”

“Liv—”