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For the first time since her recovery, Nora's spirits appeared significantly lifted and somewhat closer to her usual playful self. Watching her with Anita, her resurgence of affection, and smiles that made it to her eyes, brought me some hope that she would be okay in the long run. It wouldn't stop me from worrying, but at the very least, it was a start.

***

"Nora," I called to her when I found her standing in the hallway in the middle of the night, staring down at her bare feet on the floor poking out from the hem of her oversized sweats.

In the darkness, the whites of her wide eyes appeared ethereal and scared. She quaked from head to toe, her arms held tightly to her sides.

"Nor," I whispered when I stepped in front of her, slowly taking her icy-cold hands in mine.

The second I touched her, she burst into tears.

"What's going on, Kitten?" I urged her closer to me, and she dropped her forehead against my shoulder.

"I'm scared," she whispered, repeating it over and over while she shivered.

Her words fractured my heart and I moved in, cautiously wrapping her in a hug. All of her remained stiff in my arms.

"What's scaring you, honey?"

"Everything." Slowly, she returned my hug and I swept her off the floor. She wrapped her arms around my neck, and I carried her back to the bedroom. "I'm cold. I'm so cold."

"I can tell. Come snuggle with me and warm up, okay?" I climbed into bed, and she shifted to straddle my lap. I pulled the thick blankets over her shoulders and settled into the pillows while rubbing her all over. Her skin felt cold to the touch, clammy even in some places.

Her sniffles continued quietly while she rested her head on my shoulder, her palm pressed to my chest as always. I ran my fingers through her silky hair and kissed the apple of her cheeks. A small smile broke through her tears, and within a few minutes, she stopped shivering.

"You're okay. I'm here with you," I whispered, and she nodded.

"Can you turn on the light?" she asked in the tiniest voice.

"Of course." I reached over and clicked on the lamp on the nightstand, casting us into dim lighting. "Maybe we should get some night lights for a little while. We can put them in the halls and all the rooms so it's not dark when you walk around at night. What do you think?"

She nodded, closing her eyes while her body slowly began to relax. "Why am I like this? It's been a month."

"Nor, it's only been a month."

"I feel worse." She sniffled and covered her face with her hand. "I feel like I slept through most of that time."

"I know." I pressed my lips to her forehead, and she let out a soft breath. "Sleeping is healing. That's what Anita said, right?"

She nodded, drawing in a few slow breaths. "Yeah. I feel…" She paused, as if searching for the word, though she only hid her face more.

"Tell me, Nor. How do you feel?"

"Broken," she whispered, squeezing me tighter. "I want to have sex with you. I want to."

"I know you do, honey. We'll get there." I blinked away the uprising of my own emotions and focused on staying calm for her. "We will."

"You have to go back to work—"

"I don't." I cupped her face in my palms when I leaned her back to meet her gaze. "I don't, Nor. I've already been granted more time. I don't care about work."

"You have to care." She sniffled and hugged my hands to her chest. "What's going to happen when we go back to work?"

"Nor. Can you look at me, honey?" I kissed her hands, and she met my gaze. "I love you and I don't care about work. Remember? We have a plan. I'm going to start spanking women for a living."

Her eyes widened and she laughed suddenly, as if she never expected me to say that. "Car…"

"Work never should've mattered," I said, then tucked her hair behind her ears. "We tortured ourselves."