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He lets me go, and I feel the loss of his warm hand around me when he opens the door. Maksim stands there, eyes bouncing between us, thumb rubbing his plump lower lip.
The brooding asshole would be attractive if he wasn't so… himself.
Without a word, it feels like I'm being exchanged as Parker helps me into my coat.
The door to the SUV is being held open for us by a tall, lean man in a suit. He has dark hair and frigid, bright blue eyes, and Maksim introduces him as Niko. He holds out his hand and I shake it, only for Maksim to take my hand to help me into the large SUV I'm assuming is bulletproof. Thank God for my coat because the seats are leather. I lean outwards, facing the window, watching as we leave Brooklyn Heights and cross the lit bridge.
I really don't want to go.
"Sabrina," his dark voice breaks the silence, but I don't turn to look at him.I don’t want to look at him.
“Weak.”
The word bounces in my brain from left to right, up and down in wild zigzags, pinging against whatever empty corners there are like a logo on a sleeping computer monitor.
"Hmm?"
"I want to apologize… about earlier. I wasn't thinking."
I do my best not to clutch the skirt of my dress so it doesn't crease. This dress was not made to be sat in for too long. I'm mostly hoping there's a corner away from the noise I can stand in. If not, I’ll use the wax earplugs Parker put in my clutch. My nerves are eating me alive right now, it feels like little ants are crawling all over me, and I want to go home. Hearing Maksim trying to apologize does nothing but grate on those nerves, and I’m barely hanging on by a thread. "It'sfine, Mr. Giordano."
"It's not fine. I didn't mean to hurt you."
While it sounds sincere, I just can’t do this right now. I can’t listen to his silk voice murmuring so close to me. I can’t stand it. Can’t stand being in this car with him. Can’t stand how close to me he’s sitting… I’m going to lose my fucking mind if he keeps talking. "Can we just drop it? I have to mentally prepare for this. Is it going to be loud?"
"Yes. Very."
I inhale as deeply as I can, then close my eyes.I'm a perfect social butterfly. I am so in love with my fiancé. He is perfect. He lovesme. We're so excited to be getting married. We can't wait. Why yes, we can't wait to have children. We want four. I love him. I love him. I love him. I'm obsessed with my fiancé. I can't get enough of him. He adores me. He treats me like I've hung the moon. I don't shudder when he touches me. I love his touches. I'm perfect. He's perfect.
I chant this in my head over and over and over again, preparing for when the car lurches to a stop. My eyes open, and we're in front of an old building in the meat-packing district. The lights outside seem to glitter, and there's a queue of people standing outside along a red carpet.
My fiancé loves me. I can withstand his touches.
The door opens and Maksim gets out, holding out his hand to me. I clasp my hand around it as I drop down onto the street.
I'm perfect. He's perfect. I adore him. I love his touches.
I smile radiantly as cameras flash in our faces. I grab the skirt of my dress as I walk, pushing myself forward, one foot in front of the other. Heel-toe, heel-toe.
Flawless.
Feminine.
I am bright, shiny, and pink.
The doors to Eden open and my smile widens.
It's showtime.
Chapter Ten
Maksim.
Six Hours Prior
Fuck, I am an asshole.
"As you can see, I'm aweakwoman and unfortunately my skin burns easily. You can go now, Mr. Giordano." She starts moving away from me and to the dark stairway.