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“Isn’t he? I saw Lorcan shoot him. And…” I search my memory. “Finn collapsed on the ground. I’m sure of it. He went down.”
“Yes, well, it seems in the chaos of the raid, we misplaced him.”
I stare at her for a moment. Only Dai Qing would say the FBImisplaceda skilled and very deadly mobster who would love to see me laid low. “You’re kidding me.”
“I’m afraid not. We’re trying to determine if Lorcan knew about his brother’s extraction plan.”
I purse my lips. “Finn’s not a planner. Not like that. He’s an opportunist.” I pick at the blanket lying across my waist. “And I… Lorcan didn’t know about the warehouse, about what Finn had planned.”
“You put your career—your life—on the line, and you didn’t trust him enough to take him with you?”
“That’s—that’s not it.” Frustration eats at me, and I shift in the bed again. Another groan escapes me. They need to give me the good drugs.
There’s a knock on the doorway, and Zahir is in the entrance, a tailored black suit clinging to his frame.
“You’re awake.” He wanders in, unbuttoning his jacket and pushing his hands into the pockets of his suit pants.
“How’s Lorcan?”
He shakes his head and laughs. “Lucky to be alive. Much like you. Why the hell did you go in there? You knew we were on the way.”
“Lorcan wasn’t supposed to be there.” It’s not the professional answer, and he might take me out of the field for good after this. Playing these kinds of games has never been my specialty. “When he went in looking for me, I was worried Finn would do something to him to get to me.”
He looks at me for an extra beat. “This whole assignment has fucked you up.”
“I won’t apologize for having feelings. For being human.” I lift my chin.
“I’m not asking for an apology from you. I’m trying to unravel how you got into this situation in the first place. Your file…” He glances at Dai Qing. “Anyone could have drawn the conclusion this assignment wasn’t good for you.”
“Yet no one did.”
“Dai Qing did, but it was too late by then.” Zahir moves closer to my bed and scans me. “I’ll get to the bottom of it, eventually. How are you feeling?”
“I’ve been better.” All I can think about is seeing Lorcan.
“We’re not going to bring you back into the fold for a while. Counseling, psych evaluations, and so forth, while you get healed up.”
None of that appeals to me. Given everything that’s happened, everything I’ve learned over the last few months, it might not be the worst idea. Now, with Finn out there somewhere, I’m not even sure undercover work is possible for me again.
“Then what?”
“We’ve done our best to obscure details, plant false ideas about what went down at the warehouse. If we can track Finn, and you want to go back out on an assignment, we might be able to make it happen. I’m not promising anything. Every single piece would have to click into place for that to occur.”
“And Lorcan?”
Zahir’s mouth twists. “We’re in discussions about possibilities.” His dark gaze searches me for a moment. “Like last time I spoke to him, his primary concern is you.” He gives Dai Qing a pointed look before swinging his focus my way. “At least if you had to get yourself into such a mess, you did it for a man who seems to care about you just as deeply.”
AnI told you sois on the tip of my tongue, but I hold it back. Warmth fills my chest at Zahir’s words.
Another knock on the door echoes through the room, and in the doorway is Fiona. She shuffles on her feet in a nervous manner I don’t remember seeing last time we crossed paths when Finn was in the hospital.
“Sorry to interrupt. Mr. Donaghey was wondering when exactly you’d be wheeling Kim to his private room?”
“Who are you?” Zahir raises his eyebrows.
“Fiona, sir. I’m Mr. Donaghey’s personal assistant.”
She doesn’t mention she only assists him and his family at the hospital.