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Diane leaves and I place a quick call to Amber. I put her on speaker while I explain the situation. She seems pleased and humbled.
“This is amazing,” she tells me. “You know, we should form a group for this. There are so many people in town who could be exchanging services. I’m sure there are some older women who could use help with cleaning their gutters and mowing their lawns and they would love to pay in cookies or something.”
I laugh. “And I’m sure there are a bunch of young guys with lawnmowers who would be absolutely thrilled to have homemade cookies.”
“Brilliant.” Amber sighs. “Seriously. I’m going to talk to some of my clients as they come in today. We should put this together. This sounds like the way my grandparents used to describe things. People just helped one another out. But if we need to formally organize it, so what? People are still going to get what they need, right?”
“Absolutely,” I agree. While it would be great if this all just happened organically, I think there are a lot of people like me who feel funny accepting help without having something to give back in return.
“We should have a town meeting or something. Or maybe send out a mass email. Or put up signs?” Amber laughs. “I don’t really know how to reach the whole town.”
“You feel free to run with it,” I say. “You know a lot more people. Especially younger families who could use help. I think the grapevine and word of mouth is probably best.”
“But this was your idea. Besides, young families aren’t the only ones who need help. We just need to come up with a way to connect everyone. Oh, a website!” Amber exclaims.
I still feel myself resisting being the one to do it. I think about Cian’s foundation and the fact that I can work on that in Columbus and cities even further away. It doesn’t have to involve Emerald or anyone here that I know.
I realize that’s the bottom line. I don’t want to be up in front of people in Emerald. I appreciated what Henry said on Saturday about people being able to truly see I’ve changed that way, but…I can just be happy knowing I’ve changed. That’s enough. I don’t need to be running my mouth around town.
“I think you should totally do that,” I tell Amber. “Bounce it off some clients and see who they know that could build a simple website that could match people up.”
“Okay, it’s a great idea. I have to run, but thank you! I can’t wait to talk with Diane.”
We disconnect and I take a deep breath.
What was that? A tiny panic attack at the idea of getting involved in Emerald? Brian on the other hand, would’ve jumped at the chance to head down to the diner or the bar and start talking about the idea with people.
But Brian had friends. He felt like a true member of this town. It would have felt natural to him to be a part of something to bring the community together.
For me it would just be a part of this damnedmissionor whatever this is that I’m doing here, and I realize I don’t want that.
I’d come here to just live my life. To raise my daughter. To run the business my beloved stepfather had left me. To…
I sigh. Who am I kidding?
I came here to prove a point. I wanted the people from my past to see me. The real me. Thenowme. I wanted them to notice the ways I’ve changed and be… I’m not sure what word I’m looking for. Impressed? Maybe not that. But affected. Moved. I wanted it to make animpression. I wanted it to make them think of me differently.
I see now that there’s no way that was really going to happen because I’m not letting them know me. I’m not doing anything that wouldmakean impression. I’m keeping to myself, trying to keep off their radar. Do I wish living a quiet, simple life could be enough? Maybe.
But then I look at Cian doing all those little things like captaining swamp boat tours and helping Zeke—I’d figured out which twin was which by the end of Sunday—do construction jobs around town and I realize that those jobs mean a lot to the Landrys because they aretheirs,the way this shop was Brian’s. It’s what makes them truly happy, because it’s taking care of their people. Their family, their friends, their town, their bayou, and their animals.
My people—Ruby and Mariah, and yes, Cian—don’t need this garage and they don’t need a community program that connects people who can exchange services.
We need more than that. We need to think wider. We need to find things that make us truly passionate.
So, I open my laptop.
I have a foundation to run.
Or a foundation to create so that I can then run it.
I hear a knock on the door frame and look up.
A very handsome prince is leaning into my office. I immediately grin. “What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be enlightening young minds?”
He chuckles and steps into the office. “Do you even know what time it is?”
I look down at the clock on the corner of my screen. It’s after four. After school.