Page 125

My nerves probably aren’t helping that.

On one side of center stage, Grayson is sitting in an armchair. A few feet over are Jordy and me, on a love seat, his arm wrapped in a performative way around my shoulders. Farther along still, they’ve seated the other five girls on two benches, staggering their heights.

The crowd is laughing at something Kim just said, but I can barely focus on them over the frantic beating of my heart. We’re coming toward the end of this part of the show. Closer to my moment.

When the crowd dies down, Grayson turns to Skye, and one of the camera operators swivels toward her to grab her reaction shots. “Skye, out of all the girls, I think it’s fair to say you had a particularly easy time winning the hearts of our viewers at home.”

The crowd swells into a cheer again. It’s been doing that a lot. It’s a little exhausting. Also, I feel out of the loop. They keep referencing things that obviously make sense to anyonewho’s watched all the episodes, and seen all the online talk, but I’m missing several weeks of content here. So, Skye’s beloved? As she should be, but still—since when? What else don’t I know?

“But privately, there was someone you found it a little hard to win over,” Grayson continues. “Can you tell us more about Maya, and how you two went from being the most talked-about rivalry on the show to—apparently—on friendly terms?”

Skye and I glance at each other, and my cheeks go warm. She seems calm as she tears her eyes away from me and turns to Grayson, though. “Maya and I definitely get along, Grayson,” she says. “I think sometimes you meet people and it’s an instant click, and other times you meet someone and it takes you a little longer to figure each other out. But sometimes those people can end up your closest friends. Me and Maya, we’re a good example of how first impressions don’t always set the tone for the rest of it.”

I don’t know whether to smile or burst into tears at this, so, of course, the camera swings to me to get what’s probably a very confusing reaction shot as the crowd cheers and claps. I hope I look touched.

“Speaking of rivalries—” Grayson says.

Me and Jordy?

“There was a moment of drama when Maya beat out Perrie during the rock-climbing challenge,” he goes on. “Perrie, as an avid rock climber yourself, how did you feel about this devastating loss?”

Perrie doesn’t look especially devastated. “I was impressed by how well Maya did, actually. But it was a fair game, and I lost, so, you know. It is what it is.”

Skye and I catch each other’s eyes at this, and we both grin despite ourselves. Grayson, of course, doesn’t miss it. “Is there more to the story here, girls?” he asks.

Well, screw it. While I’m creating drama. “It wasn’t a fair game, actually,” I admit. “I snuck out the night before and practiced the route. Skye had to rescue me when I got stuck.”

The crowd roars with laughter, and a few boos. The girls make a show of being fake-outraged, and Perrie starts giggling so hard she has to gasp for breath.

Grayson slaps his knees. “Maya! I’m surprised you’re admitting to this on live television.”

Jordy squeezes my shoulder. “Did you wanna spend the night with me that bad?” he asks.

Somehow, I manage not to recoil. “I uh… yeah, I wanted to stay on, and I wasn’t sure about my chances at that stage, so I did what I had to do.”

I swear I can feel Skye’s eyes boring into me, but I manage not to look at her.

“Well, not every girl can make it to the end,” Grayson says. “Francesca, you were actually the first one to go. Were you expecting this?”

Francesca straightens, and looks right at Jordy. “No, Grayson, honestly, I wasn’t. I thought Jordy and I had a really great connection, and we had a lot of fun that day. I guess I was stunned to be sent home at that moment.”

Jordy takes his arm away from me, and I wriggle in place to shake the feel of him off my skin as he clasps his hands together. “Frankie, we had a really fun time together. You really are an awesome chick, and I’m so glad we got to re-explore that. But unfortunately, I think in this case, the way I care about you, and the way you cared about me, just didn’t match up. I hope we can stay friends.”

I would kill to see what version of that episode the public got to see. I have to assume, if Isaac included Jordy whispering to Francesca in the montage he made, that it was footage that didn’t make it into the official cut, and thepublic has no idea how much Jordy was flirting with her on her last day.

Grayson doesn’t ask Kim about being eliminated. I can’t say I’m super surprised—Jordy probably asked them to keep the question off-limits—but I still would’ve liked to see her get the chance to shame him for it. She deserves that much.

After a few more questions, the girls are escorted off, and it’s just me, Jordy, and Grayson. The cameras close in on us, and the room feels a whole lot smaller suddenly.

I zone out in terror as Grayson asks Jordy about his experience on the show, and Jordy runs through every bland, scripted nothing he possibly can to make himself look good for the cameras. It’s time, soon. Any minute now, it’s going to be time for me to say what I came here to say.

Somewhere at the back of my mind, I hear Grayson ask his next question. “But you weren’t totally sure whether Maya would end up being the one that got away, were you, Jordy? Can you tell us more about that?”

I snap back into the present, as Jordy shuffles away from me an inch or so and takes on a grave expression.

“That’s right, Grayson,” he says. “I didn’t want to go into it too much on the show, because I believe in second chances, but Maya and I… we actually had a pretty bad breakup. No one was at fault, but there were a lot of hurt feelings all around. It took me a while to get over her, actually, and it was made even worse by the fact that my family moved not long after. I was mourning the relationship I had with this, you know, this wonderful girl, and I was alone, in a brand-new country. That’s the state of mind I was in when I met Skye. And, back then, you know, it was the… it felt like a miracle, to meet someone who made me feel like things could be okay again.”

The crowdawws, and I kind of wish I could squirt water at them. Can’t theyseehow scripted this bullshit is?