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She leans in close, breath warm on my ear. ‘I saw you at the bar and asked what you’d ordered.’

I give her a slow smile. She reminds me of another pretty blonde I spent half the night talking about and that’s enough to keep me welded to the spot. We chat for a bit – her name is Emily and she’s a vet nurse. We finish our drinks and I buy another round. We flirt and I don’t step away when her hand rests against my hip. When she goes to the bathroom, my pocket vibrates, and I pull my phone out to find a message from Eva.

Missed you tonight. Sorry I’ve been so caught up in wedding stuff lately and haven’t had time for us. I’ll make it up to you. Home now and going to bed. Love you xx

What am I doing? Am I so tormented by Holly’s memory that I’m imagining the vet nurse is her?

Jaz dances up beside me. ‘You all right, mate?’

I stare at her, the coke peaking proper now.

‘You’re looking a little cosy with that bird, so I thought you might want to get home?’

I hold up my phone. ‘That was Eva. What was I doing? If she hadn’t messaged me?—’

Jaz puts her hand up to stop me. ‘I’ve been keeping an eye on you. You were just talking, and I would’ve stopped anything else, but time for you to go now, yeah?’

I nod. ‘Chat to you tomorrow.’

Outside, my clammy skin and lungs welcome the cool air. I hail the black cab moving towards me and jump in. The quiet, dark cabin helps regulate my breathing, but my body feels disjointed. Waist down, I’m buzzing, like I could take on anything, but my brain is scrambled about what just happened, and my chest is hollow about what it all means.

Chapter 7

Holly, Melbourne

Iopen an old computer file and search through documents, looking for something to update. The office is almost empty – maybe I should leave early. It looks like other people have. I’m keen to wander the city with my new camera before the afternoon light fades. I’ve neglected photography for months, what with having to sort out a care facility for Mum and Jack coming into our lives, but now that Mum’s settled, I’m desperate to get back to it.

I forget about finding work to do and open a photography website. Just as I start reading about camera settings for architecture shots, my manager’s name flashes in the bottom corner of the monitor. I slip on the headset and click the call answer icon. ‘Hi, Sasha.’

‘Hi, Holly,’ she says in a quiet voice. ‘If you’re free, would you mind coming to my office?’

‘Sure,’ I say, relieved that I’ll finally be given a project to take on. ‘On my way.’ As I pass my colleagues’ desks, it dawns on me that one of them disappeared mid-morning and didn’t return, and the other went for a late lunch.

When I knock on the office door, I’m surprised to see Sasha talking with Maria, the HR manager. ‘Holly. Come in,’ Sasha says, standing and pulling out a chair for me. ‘You know Maria, don’t you?’

‘I do,’ I say warily.

Maria gives me a quick smile. ‘Hi, Holly.’

Sasha clicks the door shut and sits back in her office chair. ‘Thanks for coming at such short notice.’

‘No problem,’ I say, glancing between them. Maybe this is about a role in the new department.

Sasha rests her elbows on the desk, laces her fingers together and holds them to her mouth. Odd body language for someone who’s about to offer me a new job. It must be something else. ‘Is this about my leave?’ I ask. ‘I know I’ve got too much. I was about to book some time?—’

Sasha holds up a hand. ‘No. Not about your leave.’ She clears her throat and looks at Maria, who gives her a nod. ‘It’s, um, it’s about your job.’

Her sombre tone causes my stomach to clench. ‘Oh.’

‘You might have noticed that the workload in your area has reduced since we’ve developed the new buildings and physical spaces team?’ Sasha says.

She poses it as a question, and I reply with the first thing that enters my head. ‘I hope their first job will be to come up with a new team name, because “buildings and physical spaces” is a bit of a mouthful.’ They both stare at me and my face warms. ‘Yes, I have noticed, but since we won the tender for the Swanston Street building, I thought there’d be something for me to do.’

Sasha audibly swallows, Maria looks down at her notepad, and I suddenly feel quite foolish.

‘That project’s gone to the new team, being a building,’ Sasha says.

‘And a physical space,’ Maria adds, quickly turning away when I shoot her a look.