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I hesitate, uncertain whether I should open up, but I’m raw and vulnerable, my guard down. ‘I miss you too.’

She brightens. ‘You do?’

I nod.

‘But I’m here and you’re there,’ she says sadly.

I slip further down into the bed and lay my head on the pillow, my eyelids drooping. I want to fall asleep with her beside me.

‘You look tired,’ she says.

‘It’s been a long few weeks.’

‘I’ll let you go,’ she says. ‘Do you think we could talk again? Try and…’ She shrugs. ‘Just talk again?’

‘Mmm. Maybe. Night, Casey.’ I hold my finger to the screen to end the call.

‘Wait.’ She stares at me, those dark eyes digging into my soul. ‘I…’ She shakes her head. ‘Nothing. Night.’

Chapter 36

Casey, London

Through the windows of the gallery, the pub taunts me. Holly staring at me through the glass, her face a blend of shock, confusion and hurt. I release a heavy breath and stare at her latest message. I thought the conversation we had would lead to another – the start of us being on speaking terms again. Two days after her mum’s funeral, I messaged to see how she was, asked if she needed someone to talk to. She replied that she felt okay and was spending time with her brother and his wife. That was five days ago and this morning when I woke, a new message was waiting for me.

I’m sorry if I gave you false hope. It was a difficult day. I received your messages, but I think it’s best we forget about each other and move on. It’s pointless when we’re in different countries and I won’t be returning to the UK anytime soon. I’m glad we found one another and had our questions answered. But we were never meant to be x

I sent a desperate response, assuring her that I didn’t want anything except to be in contact, but she left me on read.

Now, reading it again, my eyes prickle, and I rush back to my office before Michaela catches me crying in the gallery.

‘Why didn’t I just tell her when I had the chance,’ I mutter as I walk into my office.

There’s a tap at my door and I spin around to see Josanne. ‘Are you on the phone?’ she whispers.

‘No,’ I say sitting at my desk. ‘Just talking to myself.’

She takes a seat. ‘Are you okay, Casey?’

I swallow the emotion that’s edging up my throat and start rearranging the Post-it notes stuck to my monitor. ‘Yep.’

She’s quiet as she watches me. ‘I’m sorry that you and Eva broke up.’

‘I’m not.’

Her brows rise. ‘Oh. Like that, is it?’

‘Mmhmm.’

‘Okay, well if it’s not that, then something else is bothering you because you’ve gone into work overdrive, and you only do that when you’re upset.’

I arrange the Post-its neatly across my desk. ‘There’s just a lot on.’

She takes a moment before she says, ‘I don’t think that’s the reason you’re overworking.’

I slouch in my chair, no energy to keep pretending. ‘It’s someone else. Someone I really cared about, and I fucked it up. She found out about Eva before I told her. Even worse, Eva was the one to tell her.’

Surprise passes across Josanne’s face but it’s quickly replaced by concern. ‘Oh, Casey. No wonder you’re stressed. How did this all come about?’