Page 84
Story: Love Me Not
It was like everything I’d been looking for my entire life finally showed up on my doorstep in a nice pretty package just waiting for me to open it.
The days passed in a blissful blur.Each day I spent with her seemed more perfect than the last.During the day, we would keep up the facade.We would meet in the kitchen with Bella, have breakfast, and separate for the day so I could go to work and she could take Bella to school.
She would give me updates on what they were doing, I would sometimes reply with a not-entirely-professional thing or two, and then I would come home and have dinner with everyone.Sometimes we all had lunch together.
Then we would spend the rest of our time together before Bella went to sleep.It wasn’t long before Bella started asking Juliette to accompany her during her bedtime routine, which I later learned meant braiding her hair and reading her the bedtime story my sister did.
Bella had come a long way from insisting she did it herself and locking everyone out to padding out in her pajamas when she was ready for Juliette.
I wish one day she’ll trust me that much.
But I was content with this for now.Because at least she was opening up to someone.
And that someone being Juliette had my obsession with the nanny only deepening.She was an integral part of our life.Both Bella and I desperately needed her, and I was unable to hide it any longer.
Once Bella was asleep and everyone had gone home for the day, Juliette would sneak into my bed.
It was starting to feel a little bit unbelievable.Like at a moment’s notice, the powers that be would realize just how well things were going for me and would snatch it all away.I had held onto her extra tight at night over the last few days as the feeling started to weigh on me.
I hated that as soon as things started to feel good in my life there was this overwhelming sense of panic and fear that everything would go wrong.
Even if it would, I tried to push everything to the back of my mind.I tried to enjoy what I had.
“I can't believe she's actually playing with someone,” I murmured as Juliette and I sat next to each other on the grass.My fingers were just barely grazing her hand.I was being extra careful so we wouldn’t get caught.We were at a large park filled with trees, and the sweet smell of blooming flowers permeated the air.There was a large playground with a handful of kids, and Bella had found a playmate to play frisbee with.
She was laughing and looking happier than I'd ever seen her.She had been hesitant at first, but after a few minutes, she really got into it, and she was barely looking back at us anymore.
“I know,” Juliette murmured.She shifted so she could brush her fingers across my own.“I'm so proud of her.”
“Me too.”
My heart swelled every time I looked at Bella.Just a measly almost eight months now, she had been a shell of a child.Her eyes were hollow, she would barely eat, she wouldn’t get enough sleep.She had no interest in doing anything, and her grades were slipping.
This was a completely different child.A child reminiscent of the Bella she used to be before her parents died.
That's not to say that there weren’t bad days.She had them for sure.But they were few and far between when compared to before.
“It's all because of you, you know?”I said and stole a glance at Juliet.
She was wearing a yellow dress and a large sun hat, looking perfectly in place at the park.Her blonde hair was pulled back into a little ponytail, and she had accessorized with cute flower jewelry that I hadn't seen before.
She took my breath away.Every single day I saw her.It didn't matter if she was dolled up or in her sweats or in that skimpy pajama set I loved.
She turned to me, smiling, and opened her mouth to say something, but then we both heard, “Why don't you go ask your mom?And I'll go ask mine.”
“Okay!”
Bella ran over to us, grinning, her feet taking her as fast as her small legs would let her.When she reached us, she was breathless.She was wearing a cute yellow shorts-and-tank set that had small embroidered flowers on it.
Bella didn’t have her ears pierced, but Juliette had taken the time to braid her hair and place small flower pins to make up for it.She also wore a matching necklace with a single pink flower in the middle that matched Juliette’s.
“Gloria wants to know if I can go get a frozen yogurt with her!”
She was addressing… me.My mind went back to the first day Juliette came to our house, and she mistakenly called me “Mom” in front of Bella.It ruined Bella's day, but now she didn't even bother to correct the other girl.
It made my heart soar.
I never wanted to replace my sister, but seeing that Bella hadn’t broken down because of the mistake was a huge step forward.
The days passed in a blissful blur.Each day I spent with her seemed more perfect than the last.During the day, we would keep up the facade.We would meet in the kitchen with Bella, have breakfast, and separate for the day so I could go to work and she could take Bella to school.
She would give me updates on what they were doing, I would sometimes reply with a not-entirely-professional thing or two, and then I would come home and have dinner with everyone.Sometimes we all had lunch together.
Then we would spend the rest of our time together before Bella went to sleep.It wasn’t long before Bella started asking Juliette to accompany her during her bedtime routine, which I later learned meant braiding her hair and reading her the bedtime story my sister did.
Bella had come a long way from insisting she did it herself and locking everyone out to padding out in her pajamas when she was ready for Juliette.
I wish one day she’ll trust me that much.
But I was content with this for now.Because at least she was opening up to someone.
And that someone being Juliette had my obsession with the nanny only deepening.She was an integral part of our life.Both Bella and I desperately needed her, and I was unable to hide it any longer.
Once Bella was asleep and everyone had gone home for the day, Juliette would sneak into my bed.
It was starting to feel a little bit unbelievable.Like at a moment’s notice, the powers that be would realize just how well things were going for me and would snatch it all away.I had held onto her extra tight at night over the last few days as the feeling started to weigh on me.
I hated that as soon as things started to feel good in my life there was this overwhelming sense of panic and fear that everything would go wrong.
Even if it would, I tried to push everything to the back of my mind.I tried to enjoy what I had.
“I can't believe she's actually playing with someone,” I murmured as Juliette and I sat next to each other on the grass.My fingers were just barely grazing her hand.I was being extra careful so we wouldn’t get caught.We were at a large park filled with trees, and the sweet smell of blooming flowers permeated the air.There was a large playground with a handful of kids, and Bella had found a playmate to play frisbee with.
She was laughing and looking happier than I'd ever seen her.She had been hesitant at first, but after a few minutes, she really got into it, and she was barely looking back at us anymore.
“I know,” Juliette murmured.She shifted so she could brush her fingers across my own.“I'm so proud of her.”
“Me too.”
My heart swelled every time I looked at Bella.Just a measly almost eight months now, she had been a shell of a child.Her eyes were hollow, she would barely eat, she wouldn’t get enough sleep.She had no interest in doing anything, and her grades were slipping.
This was a completely different child.A child reminiscent of the Bella she used to be before her parents died.
That's not to say that there weren’t bad days.She had them for sure.But they were few and far between when compared to before.
“It's all because of you, you know?”I said and stole a glance at Juliet.
She was wearing a yellow dress and a large sun hat, looking perfectly in place at the park.Her blonde hair was pulled back into a little ponytail, and she had accessorized with cute flower jewelry that I hadn't seen before.
She took my breath away.Every single day I saw her.It didn't matter if she was dolled up or in her sweats or in that skimpy pajama set I loved.
She turned to me, smiling, and opened her mouth to say something, but then we both heard, “Why don't you go ask your mom?And I'll go ask mine.”
“Okay!”
Bella ran over to us, grinning, her feet taking her as fast as her small legs would let her.When she reached us, she was breathless.She was wearing a cute yellow shorts-and-tank set that had small embroidered flowers on it.
Bella didn’t have her ears pierced, but Juliette had taken the time to braid her hair and place small flower pins to make up for it.She also wore a matching necklace with a single pink flower in the middle that matched Juliette’s.
“Gloria wants to know if I can go get a frozen yogurt with her!”
She was addressing… me.My mind went back to the first day Juliette came to our house, and she mistakenly called me “Mom” in front of Bella.It ruined Bella's day, but now she didn't even bother to correct the other girl.
It made my heart soar.
I never wanted to replace my sister, but seeing that Bella hadn’t broken down because of the mistake was a huge step forward.
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