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And not just for the money.That’s what was even more dangerous.
“Is it okay if I pick Bella up for lunch today?”I asked Lux.
“Yes!”Bella answered for her, but I kept my eyes on Lux.She put down her iPad, a smile pulling at her lips.
“How about we all go together?”she offered, surprising me.“Where do you want to go, Bella?”
Lunch with Lux?My heart skipped in my chest.It was so normal yet so… intimate.Like something a normal couple would do.
Bella jutted out her lower lip.“Can I have time to think about it?”
“Sure,” Lux said and got up.“If that’s the case, I’m off so I can catch up on some work and meet you later.Have a good day at school, Bella.”
“Bye, Lux!”
I was stuck watching Lux’s retreating form with my heart pounding in my chest.
She hadn’t fired me, which was a good thing.But I hadn’t even begun to bring up the apartment issue and how I’d likely need a few days off to figure it out.
I was going to keep this job for the time being, meaning I would need to be close to here.Which meant moving further away from my aunt’s, and there was no telling I’d even be able to get a place in this area.
“Ready to get dressed and go?”I asked Bella.
But she was silent.I leaned forward to look at her, and her smile was gone, a more serious expression taking its place.
“You okay, Bella?”
She peeked at me before her eyes fell to the pink bow in her hands.
“I… Um… I—” She let out a long breath.It was shaky toward the end, and I immediately stopped what I was doing and placed my hands on her shoulders.
“What is it?”I asked in the lightest voice I could manage.
“I… miss my parents.”She whispered it as if she didn't want anyone else to hear.As if she were telling me a secret.I immediately felt even worse for her.I had told Lux that she couldn't just push it down this way, and I wasn't going to let her do that either.
“I know,” I said, and slowly wrapped my arms around her.She paused for a moment before I felt a few tears fall onto my arms.
I didn't say anything.I didn't move.I barely breathed as I let her decompress in my arms again.
It didn't get past me that it happened right after Lux left.I had a feeling that she was maybe trying to keep it together for her aunt.
“Can I tell you something?”
She nodded.
“I lost my parents too.It's been years, but I still miss them every day.”My voice caught at the end, and suddenly I was the one fighting back tears.
I remembered it clearly.The look on the officers’ faces as they came to knock on the door.Lucas and I had been alone, and I had no idea what to do when they gave me the news that both our parents had died in an accident.Hit and run.Probably a drunk driver, they’d said.
It was inconceivable.I mean, they hadn’t even been gone that long, and now they were never coming back.
Everything after that was a blur.Between taking care of my brother, going to the police station, trying to make it work with my aunt, and then also trying to go to school and thinking about college… It had been too much.
So I had no idea how Bella was keeping all this stress and grief inside her small body without feeling like she was going to explode.
Her hands came up to grab my arms, returning my hug.
“I don't want to feel this way.I just want them back.”