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I wanted to be better than him.
Kinder than him.
Richerthan him.
I wanted to stand above him, so tall I could spit in his face and he couldn’t do anything about it. He was so used to intimidating everyone else, for once I wanted him to be the one backing down in fear.
So when my mom’s family offered me money, probably to rectify their guilt, I took it. A lot of it. I paid off my undergrad loans and then law school. I bought a big house, a nice car, and started my career. I was on my way to beating my father, turning my back on him and helping people like my mom instead.
And then he fucking died.
“Where to now?” Oliver asks.
“I don’t know, give me a minute.”
I can feel his stare and wish he would face forward and leave me the fuck alone. Normally, I sit up front with him and enjoy the company, but not today. My head pounds and my mind keeps wandering to the redhead who won’t let my mind shut down.
“You getting any sleep, boss?”
I snort and keep my eyes closed.
Donovan grumbles something and starts the car. I don’t pay much attention to it until it starts to move. My eyes pop open, and I sit up straight. “What are you doing?”
“If you’re gonna take a nap, I’m having lunch. I’m thinking In-N-Out.”
“We have a schedule to keep,” I say, my jaw ticking.
“Then tell me where we’re going.”
I glare at him in the rearview, but in reality, I’m so fucking grateful for him. He pushes me. He’s not intimidated by me. He treats me like I’m a person, not a corrupt politician from a crime family. I respect that.
He meets my glare in the rearview mirror and turns out of the nursing home parking lot, probably headed to In-N-Out.
With a sigh, I pull out my phone and scroll through the dozen or so messages and three voicemails I have since walking into the nursing home. I check the voicemails first. Two are from my campaign manager, and one is from Settimo’s assistant wanting an update. I’ve met with him three times this week already.
I scroll through the messages, mostly from my campaign manager giving updates and a few from donors. My eyes land on a message from Abi, and I hurry to answer it like a teenage girl waiting on a text from her boyfriend. Absolutely pathetic.
Abi: You’re not free today by any chance, are you?
I type a response and hit send.
Me: Depends. You need something?
It’s a lie. Of course I’m busy. It’s a Wednesday for God’s sake. But I haven’t been able to get this woman off my mind all week, so I can’t help but see what she wants. She’s never messaged me. If we meet, it’s because I ask her to, and it’s only been for the sake of fooling my family. I’d been an idiot that night at the bar, thinking she was interested in me. How could she be? Look at the wreckage I’ve caused her.
I’m as bad as my fucking father.
What’s worse, I almost kissed her. All I could think about was how I hadn’t the night we had sex, and I regretted not knowing how her lips felt.
I can’t do this. I can’twantto get involved with anyone. I’m not built for it. It’s for the best that things turned out the way they did.
“Boss?”
“One sec.”
Oliver looks over his shoulder at me while I’m staring at my phone and then turns back to the road. “I was kidding about In-N-Out, but seriously, you gotta tell me where I’m going.”
Abi: No, not if you’re busy. It’s Zeke’s birthday and I told him I’d ask about swimming in your pool. We’ll find a public one, though. Sorry to bother!