Page 47

“Bye, Son.”

I waved and said, “Bye, Ma.”

The words earned a terrible glare from Fenli, but I only smiled and shrugged. It was what I’d been counting on. But her expression was gone too quickly, replaced by something like worry and regret.

“What is it?”

She shook free of the look and rose from her seat.

“I’m just tired,” she said. “We should go to bed.”

The whole ordeal must have made me bold because I found myself saying, “I don’t know, Fen. When we were out there, you said you’d kill me in my sleep. How do I know I can trust you?”

I’d hoped for a smile, maybe a shake of her head, or an eye roll. A wink would have been amazing, and for a split second I imagined her fingers hooking mine and drawing me onto her mattress with her—

Idiot.

Instead, I got what I deserved. With a straight face and plenty of bite to her words, she said, “You can’t. And it’sFenli.”

Then she climbed into her bed and under her covers.

With her dog.

We woke up late the next day. I made us both a cup of tea and delivered Fenli hers where she sat, still on her mattress, petting the dog in her lap. She lifted it from my hands wordlessly, taking a sip and finding it to her liking. She smiled, and it was better than a thanks.

As we went about our lazy morning, we were quiet in that comfortable way people can get when they know one another. I never wanted to see that she-bear again in my life, but if the encounter had brought me and Fenli closer—I supposed I was glad we’d run into her.

I didn’t rush away to take care of my usual jobs, knowing no one would come to retrieve me when I didn’t show up. It was a day off from responsibility, and I wasn’t going to give that up.

I caught Fenli in a grimace and asked her about her hand. It was aching where she’d gotten the gash and stitches, so I made her another tea, this one with herbs Yeshi had given her for the pain. Then I tried to distract her, unrolling a map and asking questions about the forms she’d sketched out and the things she’d seen. She joined me at the table, eager, it seemed, for the topic. The more she shared with me, the more I learned just how good at mapping she was, how much she loved it.

“It’s beautiful,” I said, looking at the rolled-out parchment between us. A lot of what I saw was like the maps I’d been using for years, the ones Gaert made and distributed to groups of hunters. But Fenli’s map was also different. She’d based a portion of her style on that of the Saik traders who’d first gotten her into the trade. It was more artistic, but also more helpful. A detailed boarder offered visual appeal while simultaneously containing information on scale, elevation, and a guide to understanding some symbols used in the map itself. Likewise, various styles of script were used to differentiate between different places, allowing the viewer to quickly determine what was what. It was more intuitive and more readily understood. My fingers itched to take it out, to retrace her steps and try to see the world the way she saw it. “You have a real talent.”

There was a knock at the door. Before I could think to act, Fenli had the map off the table, rolling it up and stashing it under her blanket while I headed across the room to see who it was. I was surprised to find Baer on the other side.

“I just wanted you to hear the news from me first,” he said in the doorway, turning me down when I invited him in. “The Elders met this morning and came to a decision. You’re to be made wolf hunter, same as Thaas. You boys have,” he hesitated, uneasy with his words, “well, you’ve served your clan well. You deserve it.”

High praise, and from Baer no less. I stood stock-still. Unsure of what to say, or how to proceed. Baer had never expressed pride in me before, not a single time. Now here he was, on my doorstep because he wanted to be the first to let me know that I’d done well.

“Thank you,” I managed.

He reached out a hand and clasped me on the shoulder. His eyes met mine, and he nodded. Then he turned and left.

I’d made him proud. That impossible, stubborn cuss of a man.

I closed the door as a smile tugged at my mouth. I turned back to Fenli.

“They’re making me a wolf hunter,” I said, unable to keep the surprise and the joy from my voice. “Baer is—he’s happy with me for the first time in forever.” I laughed.

But Fenli turned away.

She wasn’t the same after that. Whatever space we’d traversed in our relationship was lost to us now. She closed herself off to me once more. When I tried to understand, to ask her what was wrong, she denied a change. When I asked her if she was okay, she claimed tiredness or a headache.

But I knew they were lies. She was pushing me out again, regretting the few hours we’d had when she’d let me in closer. No bear could fix this, I thought bleakly.

Fenli was determined to keep me at arm’s length.

And I didn’t know how to change her mind.