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“This is going to taste awful,” he laments. “I didn’t have enough time to mask it since you need to see the Warden soon. I’ll try to see what I can do about this tomorrow.”

I need to take this every day so that I don’t get pregnant. It’s better to be protected now when there’s no place in my world for babies. It’s a small price to pay if it means there will be fewer side effects.

“Thank you,” I tell him as he pours some tea for me. “I really don’t mind the taste.”

Wrinkling his nose at me, he shakes his head. “Pet, plug your nose and drink every drop. It’s pretty terrible.”

Sitting up, I take the cup, gagging as the steam hits my face. “Oh my Gods. This is horrific,” I choke out.

“It’s for a good cause,” Ayden coos and I nod.

Squeezing my nose with my fingers so I won’t be able to smell it, I drink down the concoction with a shudder. Sidney swaps the cup with some water, and I wash the tea down with it.

My body twitches in aftershocks of how terrible it was.

“I know,” Sidney groans, collapsing onto the sofa next to me. “It will work though.”

“That’s what matters,” I croak out, the water hurting as it goes down.

Pulling me into his arms, I look down at his wrist as I rub my thumb over it. There’s a small tattoo there that says, “Find a way, or make one.”

“There are many paths out of the shit storm,” he murmurs, his muscles shifting as he sees where I’m looking.

“Sometimes, they’re just hard to see,” I remind him. I feel as if my life and options become more and more narrow.

“Isaac needs to talk to you soon,” Ayden tells me. “He’s been to your room, but you’ve been asleep each time. I think the nerdy asshole misses you.”

I’ve spent every night in my bed with the twins or between Andrya and Sidney. I missed Isaac and Grayson, but it felt wrong to ask for them.

These three have been so good to me the last few days, it feels wrong to want more.

“A cinder for your thoughts,” Sidney teases, using the Queen’s currency. “You look as if the world is on your shoulders. Share the load, Pet.”

“Gods, the turmoil in my brain would make you run so fast,” I mutter, rubbing my face tiredly. Sometimes, when I have so much on my mind, it just exhausts me.

“Nah, you’re sitting with two psychopaths,” Ayden chuckles darkly. “I saw Zachary again today, and had to keep myself from making him piss himself. I know I forced his hand, but he could have tried harder.”

My lips twitch at his logic.

“I thought about bringing Isaac coffee to be nice and lacing it with a laxative,” Sidney says lazily, his long legs spread wide as he relaxes. “If you ever think what’s running through your head is super fucked up, come find one of us. I guarantee we won’t judge you for it.”

“Never, Beautiful,” Ayden agrees. “I want to know why you feel like a pawn, even while you were outside of these walls.”

Shrugging, I slip off my shoes, drawing my feet under me.

“My mother wanted beautiful, well-behaved daughters who would get married and grow our social standing,” I explain. “I had a slew of etiquette classes that began at the age of seven, and there were always parties I was being dragged to right and left. She married my step-father when I turned ten, and then it just got worse. My mother was never satisfied with anything.”

“Did she hurt you, Silla?” Sidney asks, almost detached. A glance at him shows how tightly he’s gritting his jaw. This man is very much invested.

“Yes,” I respond with a small huff. “There’s a small area in my closet, no bigger than a crawl space, and my mother used to lock me inside to punish me.”

“Motherfucker,” Ayden growls, but I shrug.

“This was my life. Hiding bruises, pain, and crippling anxiety. People could see there was something wrong when they’d meet my eyes, so I became this meek little thing. Then it became routine to avert my eyes from the world, continuing because I was making my exit strategy,” I tell them.

“Look at me, and tell me what you were planning,” Sidney commands, picking me up to deposit me in his lap. The scent of plants and wet dirt makes its way to me, but it’s not unpleasant. Rather, it’s a reminder of how talented he is.

His arm curves around my waist, making it feel natural to curl into his body. Sidney’s emerald eyes are intense with anger, but not toward me, and that gives me courage. These men won’t judge me.