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Is it safe? Will it cause me to have crazy periods and headaches? Gods, Cinder will absolutely love to read a report that says her step-sister needs to be sterilized.

“What the fuck is going on? Why is she crying?” Sidney growls as he crosses the room.

“She started spiraling after I explained the results of the blood tests,” Patricia murmurs.

“Hey, Silla,” Sidney says, pushing my hair away from my face. I’m hiding, as usual, but his brilliant emerald eyes won’t let me. He also rarely calls me by name, so I meet his gaze. “We have a plan, Kitten, remember? She’s going to take one of my herbal teas that will disrupt the ability for fertilization to happen. I’ll bring it to her, and you can add it to her chart.”

Patricia blows out a breath. “Is it something that’ll work?” she asks worriedly.

“Yeah, it’ll absolutely work. I’m not taking any chances,” Sidney swears. “You won’t have such awful headaches either, Pet. Come back to me. It’s okay.”

My heartbeat begins to slow down as I force myself to listen to his words.

“Okay,” I rasp. “Sorry… everything went a little sideways.”

“We don’t apologize for things out of our control,” he says softly. It feels like this is a mantra as I listen to him, and I nod. “Think you can sit up? If you need to lay for a bit longer, that’s okay too. No one’s taking this from you.”

His words make me whimper, and his face contorts as if the noise pains him. “I want to kill things when you make sounds like that, Pet. When you can sit up, Patricia is going to remove the implant, and then we’re going to go and visit with Ayden. I don’t want you alone while I go clip the plants I’ll need for your tea,” he explains. “He and Andrya also have a decent ice cream stash, which will help with your adrenaline crash.”

Nodding, I attempt to slowly sit up, and Patricia just looks dumbfounded. Possibly a little guilty too.

“I forgot Sidney could help, and would want to,” she says, cringing. “The Warden mentioned it days ago…”

“It’s fine,” I accept breathlessly. “You have a lot of people who come in and out of here, I don’t expect you to remember everything.”

“Maybe not, but this is important, and I should have remembered. Sidney is here now, because I dragged the first person that I saw in the hallway that I thought could help,” Patricia says sheepishly.

“I’m glad it was me.” He shrugs. “Do you prefer mint chocolate chip or chocolate ice cream sandwiches?

“Ice cream sandwiches,” I respond immediately.

“Excellent. Patricia do what you need to so we can take off,” Sindey commands. The nurse nods, massaging my upper arm before pulling out a sterilized scalpel.

“I’m going to numb the area,” Patricia explains, grabbing a syringe, anesthetic, and a new pair of gloves. Prepping the area, she gives me the shot as I fix my eyes elsewhere.

I have a high tolerance for pain, but I’m better about needles if I don’t have to watch them go in.

“This is a very fast acting anesthetic, so I’m going to get this out now for you,” she says softly.

I don’t feel anything as she makes the cut and removes the birth control. Patricia seals the incision quickly with a little bit of surgical glue, cleaning the area up.

“You’re all set, Silla,” she says, blowing out a small breath as she throws everything away in their designated places.

“Stand up for me slowly,” Sidney insists, and with a deep breath, I slide off the medical table. “Good girl. Patricia, is there anything else happening on the medical tests I need to know?”

“Silla dropped six pounds, probably because she wasn’t very hungry recently,” she murmurs. “It’s still a lot in such a short amount of time though.”

“I don’t like the dining hall,” I confess. “So I’ll skip meals at times.”

“I’m going to kick the Warden’s ass,” Sidney growls. “I thought he was having lunch with you again?”

Shrugging, I don’t know what to tell him. “He’s still really busy. It’s fine.” I sigh. Things have been weird with Gray and Isaac, and I haven’t seen much of either of them.

“That’s going to need to change,” Patricia admonishes. “You’re losing too much weight.”

Nodding, I sigh as I leave the infirmary with Sidney. Walking to the twins room, funny enough, means that I pass by Gray’s office.

“Silla!” he yells, cursing as he bangs his leg into his desk.