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“You okay?”

She bobs her chin in a few frantic little nods. “Very okay.”

I chuckle. “Good.”

I set myself up so I can start kissing my way down her stomach. She still has her sweatpants on, and I need to see more of her. I need to see all of her. I’m already soaked from just the thought of touching her between her legs, teasing her, stroking her, tasting her.

“Becca.”

I go still and lift my head at the urgency in her voice. It’s a different kind of urgency than before.

“Everything all right?”

She looks at the end of the bed behind me instead of meeting my eyes. “Uh, yeah. I just have to tell you something.”

“Of course.”

I roll off her and move so I can lie beside her instead. It’s a tight fit in the single bed, and I’m pretty much pinned to the wall, but there is literally nowhere on earth I would rather be in this moment.

“What’s up?”

She fiddles with the edge of my pillowcase and keeps staring at the end of the bed. “Okay, so, I thought I would be all cool and not bring this up, but I don’t want to...do something embarrassing, so maybe it’s better to mention it.”

I wait for her to go on, brushing my hand up and down her arm so she knows it’s okay to take her time.

“All right, soooo...I actually only came out and started doing things with girls when I got to UNS. Then I got in a relationship with a dude a few months later that lasted until the end of last term, so...This is embarrassing, but I didn’t feel ready to, like, go all the way when I was hooking up, so I’ve never actually gone down on a girl. One girl has gone down on me, but I’ve never, uh, done it myself.”

A rush of tenderness fills my chest until it feels like it’s about to burst open. She’s clearly having a hard time saying this out loud, but she trusted me enough to tell me anyway.

I lay my hand on her shoulder. “Hope.”

She still won’t look at me. “I know that’s not exactly sexy—”

“Hope, there is nothing wrong with that, and it has nothing to do with how sexy you are. Also, we don’t have to do anything you’re not ready for. I’m very happy to just go down on you, or we don’t have to do anything else at all. I’m perfectly happy to just lay here and talk to you if that’s what you want.”

She shifts onto her side and finally meets my gaze. Her eyes flash with hunger.

“Trust me, I want to do way more than talk. I’d really like to...taste you.”

I have to fight not to groan.

“I just thought you should know,” she continues, “in case you didn’t, you know, want to do that to me if I’d never—”

“Hope.” I sit up and lean over her. “I really do not care about your experience level either way. All I care about is what would make you feel good right here right now, whether that’s giving or getting or all or none of the above. It’s all good.”

“Right. Yeah. Ugh.” She twists her head to the side and buries her face in the pillow for a second, letting out a muffled groan. “Why am I making this so awkward? UGH!”

“Hey.” I hook a finger under her chin and turn her head back to face me. “Right here, right now. That’s all that matters.”

I’m saying it for both of us. If I focus on anything else, the rest of the world is going to come crashing into the room to steal this moment away.

This moment is too perfect to lose.

She nods, and I take that as my cue to bend down and kiss her again. We start off soft and slow, but it doesn’t take me long to remember how much I want her. She reaches to squeeze my ass hard, and I know she feels the same.

“I want these off you,” I mumble against her lips as I tug on the band of her sweatpants. She doesn’t break the kiss, but she does lift her hips enough for me to start tugging the pants down. I give up when she slips her tongue in my mouth and let the distraction take me over for a while. She flicks my teeth with her tongue just like I did to her, and the sensation gets me so wet I can feel it every time I move.

“Off. Now,” I pant when I finally pull away. I wait as she strips the pants the rest of the way off to reveal a plain pair of dark blue underwear. I can see how wet she is, and it’s all I can do not to rip them off and bury my face between her legs.