Page 4

I was such a goner.

Five Before

THAT FRIDAY, AFTERschool had cleared out for the day and I had successfully managed to dodge my friends, I found myself laying in the middle of the quad, sprawled out across the grass, thinking that maybe the warmth of the sun would somehow seep its way into my bones and worm its way into my soul.

I couldn’t explain it—I didn’t understand it—but I felt numb, hopeless. It was like this shadow that followed me around sometimes, clouding the world in a haze I didn’t care to see through. It sheltered me from the outside, protected me. But sometimes it felt like I was drowning.

I opened my eyes and saw Greyson walking across the quad, watched his sure and confident steps. He was heading right towards me, smiling. I wished I felt the kind of happiness that radiated off of him. I couldn’t even find it in me to smile back. I was still reeling. Still lost in the darkness I couldn’t seem to claw my way out of.

“You ready?” Greyson asked.

“Ready?”Ready for what?

“It’s Friday.”

Friday?

“Poetry assignment?” He rocked back on his heels, gripping the straps of his backpack, looking down at me expectantly.

And then it dawned on me, or more like violently smacked me in the face. “Oh, shit! I almost forgot. I’m sorry. Yes, I’m…I’m ready. Do you want to head up to the library, or something?”

“You hungry? We could go to Maddie’s Diner,” he suggested instead.

“Oh…I don’t have a car, actually.” I did have a car, I just refused to drive it.

He smiled, pulling his keys out of his pocket and dangling them from his fingertips. “I’ll take you. Come on.”

I stood from the ground and wordlessly followed him to his car. He opened the door for me, and I slid in. He drove a nice car—a really nice car, actually. Clean-cut lines, smooth leather, and the smell of old, classic car.

“This car is so beautiful it’s disgusting,” I said.

“Shh, earmuffs, baby girl.” He laughed, petting the dashboard before turning towards me. “There’s nothing disgusting about Lady.”

So, he was one ofthosetypes. The kind that treasured a purring engine like it was a beating heart; the kind that felt it necessary to name their car. So, he wasn’t perfect after all.

Ah, hell. Who was I kidding? The way he’d just pet his car and called herbaby girlwas hot as hell. I wanted to be hisbaby…and I might’ve had the passing thought of wanting him to pet me like that, too.

I smiled to myself. “Sorry, Lady,” I said with a hand on the dashboard.

Greyson groaned, lip caught between his teeth. It was the most beautiful sound. I wanted to hear it again, and again and again. “Careful, Jess. Lady will get attached if you keep sweet talking her like that.”

“She sounds awfully moody.”

He laughed, and with his foot to the pedal, I was sucked back into my seat. Lady purred—no,growled—as we made our way across town. The music was turned way up, something soft and catchy, seductive. So, Greyson had great taste in music, too. Was there anything he sucked at? I doubted it.

We arrived at Maddie’s Diner, and Greyson turned back the key, Lady’s motor shuddering to a halt. I went for the door handle, but Greyson stopped me with a hand on my arm.

“Lady would be highly offended if I didn’t get the door for you,” he said.

I laughed. “Really? I totally had her pegged as a feminist.”

“Nope. She’s old-fashioned. Believes a pretty girl should never open their own door.”

Andholy shit,the blushing of my cheeks. I didn’t do blushing. He noticed and smiled softly, opening his door and coming around the car for mine.

When he opened my door, my eyes locked onto his.Such a strange place to feel so familiar, so comfortable,I remember thinking.

He reached his hand out for me, his fingers gliding over mine achingly slow, and it was like a drug. That excitement, the awareness of a first touch that stirred like butterflies in my stomach and made my heart beat just that much faster. I was already addicted.