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Ishove away from my computer and stalk toward my room.

Bloodboils in my veins asIrifle through my nightstand drawer.Ifind a black satin bag and leave the house with it in a death grip, tossing it into the passenger seat of theTacomabefore driving down the road.

Thedriveway is empty whenIpark at the twins’ place, but with music blasting through the stucco,IknowAdrianis home.

Unlockingthe front door,Icrack it open to peek inside.Doesn’tlook like he’s in the great room, soIquickly step inside and shut the door behind me.

Stealthily,Isneak through the house, slinking to each corner to scope out the area before moving forward.He’snot in the kitchen; he’s not in his bedroom.

Waterruns in his bathroom.

Islip into his bedroom and set the black pouch on a nightstand.Venturinginto his closet,Isnatch a few belts off a shelf and work quickly to wrap them around a slat in the headboard and the bedposts.

Thewater shuts off in the bathroom.

Ishrink into the shadows with a pounding, aching heart, and wait.

Chapter39

“The Worst in Me”

–Bad Omens

Embersof a fire die out.Graytendrils of smoke curl and waft up from the ground, disappearing in a violent wave whenAdriankicks sand over it.

Mosteveryone has left already, although a few people are too far gone and crashed in their cars a few yards away.Wethought it’d be fun to meet up with a few musician friends to jam—jamming turned into a bonfire party at the beach, complete with drinks and a smorgasbord of blunts that started passing hands in a gradual blur.Withour headlining international tour wrapped up, our first international awards show last month with a bunch of wins, and an extra-stressfulNewYear’sBallin two weeks,Ihaven’t said no to any drink or smoke that’s passed my direction.

IwishZakwas here, too, but he’s inAustinfor some curanderismo workshop he’s been dying to attend.Fornow,Adrian’scompany will have to do.

Thejoint between my knuckles suddenly burns.Ihiss and let it fall to the ground, whereDreestomps it out and covers it with more sand.Simultaneously, he pulls out a new joint with a grin.

Snorting,Ireturn his beam.

Theway he brings it to his lips, delicately positioning them around the paper, cupping one hand around the flame of his lighter from the ocean wind and slowly inhaling, thoroughly mesmerizes me.Theflame casts a soft glow over his sharp features, and the darkness after it dies can’t hide his delirious smirk.

Fuck, he’s beautiful.

Iblink myself out of it, forcing my gaze to the sand below.Wavescrash nearby, but they sound so far away with my heart beating so loudly in my ears.

Adrianwhistles, andIrealize he’s holding the smoking blunt inches from my face.Igladly pluck it from his fingers.

Inhale.Inhaleeven deeper.Exhale.Coughviolently.

Dreeshoves a cool bottle of water in my hands.Theback of theSuburbanis down; he throws a few blankets over the thin mattress he stuffed in there and situates a couple of pillows where our heads will lay.

Igulp down the water, letting it soothe my throat before climbing into theSuburban.

Despitethe blanketDreetossed over me, a chill grips me thatIcan’t shake—probably because, on top of it being winter,Irun cold and the only timeI’mable to warm up at night is withZaknearby.

Afierce shiver rushes through my body.Myteeth chatter asIhug myself.

Awarm arm loops around my waist, and a body scooches in close at my back.Instantly, warmth flows through my veins, gradually killing off the chill.

Ibreathe in relief, eyes fluttering closed.Muchbetter.

Wavescollide onto the shore, and rain begins drizzling on the metal roof.

Blinkingis such a fucking chore with my head so far up in the clouds, but the breathing behind me isn’t the oneI’mused to—the arm around me isn’t, either.Close, but not the same.