Page 65 of Witchblood
“Cupcakes and sex would be a good combo.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. In some ways we were a really good match.
He laughed lightly. “I’ve read lots of romance novels. Was waiting for my wayward mate to find his way home and trying to keep my wolf from playing the worst game of chase ever. Some of the most unusual ideas of food sex…”
How one little kiss had started all this, I couldn’t fathom. If Felix had not raped and nearly killed me that night, would I have met Liam?Apahad been trying to find me a mate. A true mate, or just someone he thought could better care for me?
“See. Your mind is a whirl of questions, doubt and confusion. I don’t worry about our mating. We are meant to be together. However it happened, it did. We met. I heard your call and we kissed, sealing us to a bond that would eventually pull us back together. That worked out just fine.”
If he had any idea how the last year had been…
“Vampires and things aside,” Liam said as though catching my thoughts as they began to scatter. “Everything else will work itself out.” He wrapped a hank of my hair around his fist, rolling and unrolling it like it fascinated him. “Touching you makes me feel whole, even while I can feel your unrest. It hurts my heart to know that you’re not as settled as I am.”
“I’m sorry,” I said automatically. “I’m not sure how to fix it.”
Liam nodded. “Might not be your doing at all. My pack is in disarray. I can barely feel them. Toby is sitting right outside your camper door and he feels like the whisper of a shadow.”
Had mating with me broken something within his pack? I was happy to hear Toby was okay. “How would you fix that if I wasn’t here?” I asked.Apadidn’t speak of his connection to the pack, though I knew he had it. Many wolves complained of him giving them orders mind to mind, so they couldn’t argue back. I’d always believed the times I thought I heard his voice in my head, that it was just some memory coming up. Maybe it was more to it than that.
“I have to reestablish the den.”
“We should go to the house then.” I tried to pull away, but Liam wouldn’t budge.
“The pack den is not a dwelling. Not really. It’s easier if it’s tied to a place, which is usually the alpha’s home. But the pack den is really a state of being. Security and happiness for the wolves in the pack. Only an alpha can create it, though it’s a fragile thing. It’s why alpha’s don’t challenge each other often. Once a den is established, it’s difficult to reform it after killing the alpha who created it. The pack resists the change even if they support the new leader. When a pack member is lost, often there is chaos in the bond. Grief can gnaw away at the unity of any pack.”
“So your den is messed up cause your wolves are scattered to try to get away fromApa’sblack cloud?”
“Something like that. Dylan’s disappearance has a lot to do with it. As my third he’s a strong part of what makes the pack feel safe. Though if I’d been sane while you were gone, I could have held it together by will alone. Distance doesn’t matter.” He shook his head as though trying to shake away the memories. “I was so lost in pain and fear of never finding you again. My wolf howled non-stop, fighting me for control, claiming it could find you. But the wolf is a simple creature. He’d have taken over, and when I was too weak to fight, likely killed someone while searching for you.”
“When I touched you it changed?” I wondered. Remembering him in the cave and how vulnerable he’d left himself. The wolf probably hadn’t liked that.
“Yes. The wolf stopped and we both waited like we had spotted skittish prey, and feared chasing you away. He let me have control, saying my human brain was more capable of calming the fox and claiming the man, though he was on board for both.” Liam tugged my hair. “I want you to try something with me,” Liam said.
“Okay.” At that moment I probably would have helped him take over the world if he’d asked me to. As long as he didn’t let me go. Hope was what he gave me, and somehow I couldn’t think of a better place to start.
Chapter 28
He let go of my hair to wrap his arms around me, and then pressed his cheek to mine. I sighed at his warmth. “Close your eyes,” he instructed.
“Okay.” I shut my eyes.
“You say you smell my scent. Focus on that. Follow that in your head. See if you can follow me as I touch each of the pack members. It’s a bit like guided meditation.”
“Are we going somewhere?” I wondered, doubtful. I had never been good at meditating. Too much noise in my head.
“You’re the alchemist, and you scoff at magic?” His tone was teasing.
“Alchemy is science, not magic.”
“This is magic. But small magic. Trust me. We alphas do this with new wolves to establish a connection. You just have to let me through. Now breathe me in.”
I focused on the scent of him. It was warm and sweet, like fresh bread, which was sort of how I felt in his arms. Pillowed in a warm cocoon of safety. With his cheek pressed to mine, chest to my back, I could feel his heart beating. It was soothing and steady, like a river. I flashed back briefly to the river in Underhill, and how it had been divided in the middle. Dangerous on one side, and full of life on the other. A glance back into the woods and a light flickered off of iridescent legs, the scrape of glass against glass, the feeling of terror. The memory so vivid it startled me. I reached for Liam’s warmth, his smell, the feeling of his soul wrapped around me, seeking peace, or at least a minute to slow my racing heart, only to fall.
The sensation was so abrupt I gasped and opened my eyes to find myself in a giant bakery kitchen, alone. Was I back in Underhill? What if I’d never left? The panic arose whip fast, but a timer beeped and the smell of vanilla, cloves, and cardamom filled the room calming my fear.
I turned to try to find Liam, only instead of Liam, there was a door to a proofing room. The proofer was a large warming room to help the dough ferment and set properly before being baked. Most large bakeries had proofing rooms. It was an essential part of the baking process. Some bakeries had small proofing boxes, but this room was large enough to fit easily fifty or more racks filled with loaves.
The door hung open and racks of dough were scattered about haphazardly. Some racks were only half full, others appeared ready to be baked.