Page 9

CHAPTER NINE

BOX IT UP

BOWIE

Henley

We still meeting today?

Rhodes

Hell yeah!

Weston

I’ll miss you. But married life…guys! Highly recommend. 100/10

Penn

Miss you, brother. And I’m happy you’re happy, but dude! Bowie and I are not joining the cult. How many times we gotta say it?

For once…what Penn said.

Weston

You will never kill my hope.

Rhodes

What Weston said.

Henley

I wish Tru would marry me TODAY. Yesterday would’ve been better.

Penn

YOU GUYS ARE HOPELESS. I’ve gotta get off this thread right now because I’m gagging. It’s too early for shouty caps, and I’ll be late to Luminary if I don’t.

Luminary Coffeehouse is bustling. It always is on Saturday mornings, but today feels extra crowded. It’s been a long week and I’m dragging. I’ve been sitting with my dad a lot, hanging out with Becca every minute that I’m home, and trying my best to wipe Poppy Keane from my thoughts. It’s impossible and exhausting to even keep trying.

I wave at Clara and she motions that she’ll be right back with my Americano. Becca is with Mrs. McGregor this morning. They were working on an art project as I was leaving and Becca didn’t want to stop, so I’m meeting the guys alone.

I step into our room in the back—even Clara calls it our room now because, besides her, we’re the only ones who use it. Henley is the first to arrive and he’s nursing his drink, staring into space .

“You okay?” I ask.

“Hey. Yeah. Just tired. I had a meeting about the podcast that went late last night. It’s fun, but damn, I already miss the days of just playing ball.”

“We sure miss you out there.”

He smiles and leans back in his seat. “Thanks, man. I have to admit, my body is thanking me for stopping when I did.”

“No doubt,” I’m saying, as Rhodes and Penn walk in.

“Two for one,” Penn sings.

“How did we manage that?” Henley asks, doing the slap shake with them before I do.

“I had a quieter than normal Friday night,” Penn says. “Not intentionally, but it was for the best. I had to pull a runner out of the club last night. There was a stage 5 clinger and it was not good.” He shudders. “Sam saved the day by calling. I ended up taking him to Starlight Cafe and then home.” He shrugs. “I felt like you old coots, going to bed by ten o’clock.”

Rhodes smirks. “Going to bed by ten o’clock is my new favorite thing now that Elle is in there waiting for me.” He taps the table. “Hey, you guys are all coming over tonight, right?”

Everyone chimes in with their yeses.

“I might put Becca to bed and then come over. I’ve been in Denver a lot this week and need to spend some time with her.”

“How’s your dad?” Henley asks.

“Not good. They admitted him yesterday. I’ll be going over there in a little while.” I make a face and try to move on. I don’t enjoy talking about myself, but I really don’t like talking about my family. “I’m looking forward to tonight. Should I bring anything? ”

“Just yourself,” Rhodes says. “Let us know if we can do anything, Bow.”

“Will do.”

Out of all the years I’ve known these guys, they’ve only been around my parents a few times, and those times were doozies. My dad was drunk and belligerent and cussed my mom and me out when we tried to usher him out of the room. It was in German, so no one but us knew the vile things he was saying, but I’m pretty sure everyone got the gist.

“Is your brother in town?” Rhodes asks.

My brother is another topic I avoid. We’ve been estranged for years and although I hate it, I’ve learned to live with it. Well, if shoving it to the recesses of my mind to avoid thinking about it is learning to live with it…

Yeah. I’ve got issues.

“No. He wants nothing to do with my dad, so I’ll be surprised if he shows.”

If the guys are surprised by this, they don’t show it. They’ve learned not to push too much about my family and I’m grateful they don’t push now.

“Well, I hope your dad will be okay,” Henley says.

“Me too,” Penn says. “The whole thing sucks.”

I nod and am grateful when Clara knocks and steps inside the room, holding a tray of our drinks.

We all thank her and she hurries back out.

“Marv and Walter are on a tear this morning,” she mutters.

“I’ll handle them,” Penn says. He walks out of the room and we look at each other.

“What’s with that?” Rhodes asks.

Henley shrugs. “Last time we were in, I noticed that Penn seems to have a way with them. ”

“Interesting,” Rhodes says. He turns to look at me and by the slow, mischievous grin that forms, I’m already nervous.

“What?”

“Oh, nothing. My wife just wanted me to encourage you to let loose tonight. Poppy will be there,” he sings.

“Fuck. Why is she everywhere?” I swipe my hand down my face and lean back in my seat, feeling what little energy I had drain out of me.

“Why not?” Rhodes says, shrugging. “She’s nice, she’s funny…she’s really great, Bowie. Honestly, she’s like a ray of sunshine in your black-and-white life. I don’t know why you’re not all over that. She’s clearly into you.” He frowns. “And you seemed into her at the wedding. A little bit like a stick was up your butt the next day, but that’s nothing new for you. Am I missing something?”

“Thanks a lot,” I choke out.

Henley and Rhodes chuckle and Penn walks in, shaking his head.

“Those old bastards are trying to scare off the customers. Too crowded for them.” He holds out his hand. “But I managed to talk them down.”

“How’d you do that?” Rhodes asks.

“Gave them tickets to our first game.”

“I thought they hated going to games,” Henley says.

Penn shrugs. “They seemed happy about it. At least as happy as those guys ever get.”

“We’ll let you deal with them from now on.” Henley laughs. “Clara will be happy about that.”

Penn sits down. “What did I miss?”

“Rhodes is asking what he’s missing about Poppy and Bowie because they were all about one another at the wedding and then this one was a distant motherfucker. I noticed that too, but you’ve been too busy this week with your dad to chat.” Henley tilts his head up toward me. “We’re waiting for the answer.”

My dad being sick has been distracting in a lot of ways, but not nearly enough.

“It’s a long story, and one I don’t have time to go into,” I say, standing up.

“What? You’re leaving?” Rhodes frowns up at me. “Come on, man. Talk to us.”

“If I want to make it to your house tonight, I need to go see my dad now and then get home to Becca.”

“All right. But you’re not off the hook. Text us,” Penn says.

I lift my hand in a wave and don’t say anything, and the motherfuckers notice.

Of course. They might be oblivious about a lot of shit like most men are, but when it comes to gossip, they’re like a bunch of old biddies.

“Here, take the book with you,” Rhodes says, handing me The Single Dad Playbook. “It’ll give you something to read in the hospital.”

When I get there, I open our book.

Being in love is making me a better dad.

Hell, I’m a better human for it.

I wake up every morning

and feel so grateful to be alive.

If this is what seeing everything

through rose-colored glasses is like,

I’m all for it.

~Henle y

My jaw clenches and I look up at my dad in the hospital bed. Mom has a chair pulled up to the bed, and her chin is brushing her chest as she dozes. Every now and then, her head flies up and she relaxes when she sees that I’m here before nodding off again. I’ve tried to get her to go home for a while to rest, but she refuses.

Dad’s bad off. His liver is failing, and his organs are shutting down.

I’m shutting down too, but I don’t have the health reasons to blame.

Sam wants to know if he’ll know when he’s in love.

I said I think so, but what the hell do I know?

Will he know?

I’m beginning to think

I’ll never know firsthand myself.

~Penn

I sigh, my whole body feeling heavy.

I look at the book again, the words swimming in front of me.

I think we’re cured of Levi peeing on trees.

Now he’s into streaking.

It was twenty degrees yesterday,

and by the time I opened the car doo r

to help him out of his booster,

he’d stripped down to his birthday suit.

I swear, this kid is going to be a dangerous teenager.

Hoping that he gets it all out of his system now.

That’s how it works, right?

~Rhodes

This one makes me smile, but I still can’t shake my mood. Being around my parents has that effect on me, but it’s more than that.

Sleeping with Poppy affected me more than it should have. I have so much regret about so many things. I shouldn’t have had alcohol. I’ve never struggled with an addiction like my father has, but it’s enough that it lowered my inhibitions. I can’t afford to make any mistakes. My daughter is counting on me, and I can’t let her down. I’m the only parent she has.

I shouldn’t have had sex with Poppy.

I shouldn’t be such a cold motherfucker.

I pinch the bridge of my nose, feeling a headache coming on.

I’m there for a few hours and my dad sleeps the whole time. I run to get food for my mom and eat with her and then head home and hang out with Becca. We take a walk and she talks about the emus and cows and goats she met in Landmark Mountain.

“We get pet, Dad,” she says for the umpteenth time.

And because I’m already ridden with guilt about the way my life is going and because ultimately, I cannot deny my girl anything for very long, I say yes. I love her so fucking much.

We go to Pet Galaxy and I try to talk her into a fish, but wouldn’t you know it…there’s a fresh batch of dogs and cats up for adoption. I move toward the cats because I’ve heard they’re easier to take care of, but Becca goes straight for a little grey-and-white dog. I cringe just looking at it. Hairless except for the mad scientist wisps of hair on its head, its body is spotted and its brown eyes are sheepish as it gazes up at us…with its tongue out. Does it have a single tooth? I’m not sure.

“Look, Dad!” Becca turns to me and sticks her tongue out.

I laugh and shake my head at the same time. “How about this one?” I point to the beautiful cat behind us.

She shakes her head. “No, him.” She points at the hairless dog.

Fred and Jenny, longtime employees of Pet Galaxy, are both milling through the kennels and Fred lights up when he sees Becca stick her tongue out.

“You like Martha?” he says.

“Martha,” I echo.

My nose curls up just looking at her. She is seriously the most pitiful dog I have ever seen.

Fred opens her kennel and lifts her out of there, holding her close enough for us to pet. I touch her skin and shudder.

Fred laughs. “It’s different after you’re used to a dog with hair or fur. But she’s a sweetheart. And you don’t have to worry about shedding!”

“We take him,” Becca says.

“Martha is a girl. Would you rather have a boy dog?” I ask hopefully.

“We take Martha. Girls are better.”

“Why don’t we see if she likes us first,” I say.

“I hold her,” Becca says .

I look at Fred and he motions for us to follow him to the bench.

“She’s not nippy at all?” I ask.

This will be the true test, how Martha responds to Becca.

“She’s as docile as they come,” Fred says. “Potty-trained, four years old. Her owner is Mary Nugent…did you ever meet her?”

I shake my head.

“She’s only lived in town for about a year but is transferring back to California and her new apartment doesn’t allow dogs.”

Becca holds out her arms and Fred places Martha in her lap.

“Be still with her, okay? It’s important to be calm around dogs we don’t know,” I remind her. “And even after we know them well,” I add.

Even I have to admit that the dog nestles right into Becca, which delights her, but she does as I asked and remains calm. The dog looks up at me groggily and then her eyes close and she falls asleep.

“She’s sleeping, Dad!” Becca whispers loudly. “We take her home for nap.”

I chuckle and so does Fred.

“Looks like you’ve found the one,” he says.

I text the guys after we get home with a carload of dog paraphernalia. I had no idea dog shit was so expensive.

Sorry, I won’t be able to make it tonight. Becca and I got a dog.

I send a couple of photos of Martha and the responses are immediate.

Penn

What the fuck is that?

Rhodes

Are you sure that’s a dog? Bring her over! We need to meet the newest member of the family…even though I’m a little scared of that thing. Bogey needs friends.

Henley

A Chinese Crested. Spectacular. I could not have imagined a better dog for you, my friend.

Her name is Martha and it’s okay, get all the wisecracks out of your system now, because she doesn’t need to hear that mess in person.

Weston

I need to go on a honeymoon more often. You miss me so much you got a dog. You love me. You really love me.

Penn

I miss you, but hell no, I’m not buying a dog.

Weston

Guess you don’t love me enough.

Rhodes

Get home and convince Bowie to go out with Poppy. He’s got a dog, I think he’s ready. And Bowie, get your ass over here tonight! A new dog is no excuse and you know it.

Yawning. Have fun tonight. Peace out.

I turn my sound off and go play with Becca and Martha.

It’s possible that I’m the king of compartmentalizing emotions, but I’m just doing the best I can.

Martha’s head leans on my hand and I scratch her head softly. She gives me one long swipe of her tongue and I grimace but smile down at her.

“You’re not so bad, are you?”