Page 7

CHAPTER SEVEN

FOOL TOOL

BOWIE

I messed up royally last night. It didn't feel like it while it was happening. Fuck, everything about it felt right in the moment.

Poppy .

Everything about her is so…good. She's beautiful. She’s fun and funny. She’s kind. Dancing with her made me feel more alive than I’ve felt in years.

I knew better than to drink while being around her because it broke down some of the walls I’ve worked so hard to keep up.

And the way she felt against me, the passion in her kisses…the way she looked, the sounds she made, all of it…well, despite how right it felt, it was a colossal mistake that should’ve never happened.

I wanted nothing more than to go back in there and sink into her heat again and again and again.

I adjust myself in my seat as I sneak looks at her across the table, where she's sitting next to Becca. They’re laughing at the picture Poppy just drew on the kid’s menu.

Why does she have to be so fucking cool?

Last night, I knew what a tool I’d been as soon as I had a little clarity. While Becca was sick, I sobered up and acknowledged the mess I’d made, having sex with Poppy. It felt fucking amazing, but fuck . Long after Becca had fallen back to sleep, I lay awake, cursing my poor choices and talking myself out of going back in there to continue what we’d started.

I couldn't go back to that room, that bed , or I would just sink deeper into the Poppy trap.

She noticed that I didn’t return her smile when she came into the restaurant, and the way she ignores me now feels wrong, but this is the way it has to be. I can't afford to go down that rabbit hole. She's local, she's nice, she's becoming friends with all of my friends. Becca loves her. She's here , for Christ's sake, invited to the wedding of my friends after barely knowing them a minute.

She’s not going anywhere…which means I cannot afford to get invested.

I feel like the world’s largest asshole, but I’m actually saving her a world of hurt. No one needs my baggage.

Across from me, Ruby Landmark, Weston's sister Felicity’ s sister-in-law—try saying that fast—starts talking about her emus and I just pray to God Becca won't overhear her as she invites everyone over to visit. I've managed to avoid seeing the emus when we’ve come to Landmark Mountain. I’d much rather take Becca on the gondola to the top of the mountain or something else fun, but Becca loves animals. Problem is, she won’t want to leave them.

Sure as heck, it catches Poppy's attention and she turns to look at Ruby.

“Did you just say emus?” she asks.

Kill me now. I bury my head in my hands.

“Emus?” Becca repeats.

“Yes, we have so many and they love visitors,” Ruby says excitedly. “You guys are more than welcome to come over and visit.”

“I come to your house,” Becca says.

Poppy looks at me and the smile drops from her face. She turns back to Ruby.

“I can't turn that down,” she says. “It's not every day that I get invited to come visit emus. Count me in.”

The rest of the girls nod excitedly.

“I’m in too,” Elle says.

“You’re going to love them,” Sadie says.

“Dad. We go see emus,” Becca says.

“We probably need to head back to Silver Hills,” I tell her.

“We see emus,” Becca says, pounding her fist lightly on the table.

Now I don't just give Becca whatever she wants all the time, especially not when she has a meltdown over something. There are times I have to put my foot down. But today is not one of those days. Most of the people in this room know and love Becca, but I still don’t want this to escalate during Weston and Sadie’s celebratory weekend. We have time to take a little detour. We don’t actually have to be back to Silver Hills for anything important. She’ll love the freaking emus. It'll probably make her whole week.

Just because Poppy might be going doesn't mean anything.

Keep telling yourself that , I think.

And that’s how I end up at Callum and Ruby Landmark’s ranch after brunch. It’s a beautiful piece of property with the mountains surrounding a stunning house and barn. As soon as we step out of the car, Becca starts laughing and I feel like a jerk for wanting to avoid this stop. A flop-eared goat and cow are the first to greet us, and then an emu comes running up like she’s late to the party.

Becca squeals when the emu stops right in front of her, half-terrified and half-delighted.

Ruby comes running up behind the emu. “Dolly, slow your roll! Sorry for that in-your-face greeting. Dolly really loves company. She won’t hurt you, I promise.”

Becca holds her hand up to pet the emu and the goat sticks its head in the way. Becca cracks up.

“Daddy, he pet my hand!”

I laugh. “He sure did.”

“That’s Delphine and she loves to hog all the petting time. And this is Irene,” she says, petting the cow.

Delphine and Irene realize there are more people arriving and go to greet them. Dolly stays near us, ducking her head.

“She likes you,” Ruby tells Becca. She points at the other emus roaming the property. “They’ll like you too, but they’re not as friendly.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Poppy getting the same star treatment from the cow and the goat. Her head falls back as she laughs, and Becca turns at the sound .

“Poppy, look! Dolly!” She points at the emu and Poppy’s eyes widen.

“I’ve never seen an emu in real life. Wow. That is wicked cool,” she says.

I snort and then frown, trying to play it off like that sound didn’t come from me.

But it’s too late. Poppy’s eyes narrow as she looks at me.

“What was that?” she asks.

“Hmm, what?” I ask, turning to look behind me.

“Was that a scoff I heard coming from you?”

Her eyes are shining and I can’t tell if she wants to laugh or knee me in the nuts.

“Not a scoff. I just haven't heard ‘wicked’ used that way in a long time,” I say.

She lifts her shoulder, the tension in her face relaxing. “I grew up in Boston, what can I say? My parents still say it all the time, even though we’ve lived in Colorado for years now.”

Becca runs off, chasing after Dolly as she runs around. It's too funny to not laugh.

“She loves animals, doesn't she?” Poppy says.

“She really does.”

“Do you have any animals?”

“No,” I say firmly.

“Too bad,” she says, walking away. She looks back at me and takes a step toward me. “By the way, you don't have to make it weird about last night,” she says under her breath.

“I didn't mean to make it weird,” I admit. “Becca was sick in the night and then it just…” I lift both shoulders, suddenly at a loss for words.

Her expression is tense again, the walls back up. “Yeah. Got it,” she says. “No worries. I'm not gonna…well, never mind. ”

She looks past me and smiles, and I turn to see Callum standing there. She walks away to join the girls. They laugh as Becca and Dolly run around the yard.

“Let me turn on the music,” Ruby calls. “You'll get to see her dance, Becca.” She turns on the music and it's hilarious watching Dolly zooming around the yard. Becca starts dancing too and laughs harder than I’ve ever seen her laugh. Despite the less-than-stellar way I just handled that conversation with Poppy, now I can’t stop laughing.

“Hey, Callum,” I say.

“Hey,” he says. “Sorry, I interrupted a…moment there.”

“Oh, you picked up on that.”

“Hard to miss, he says, chuckling under his breath.

Callum is the second oldest in the Landmark family. And he's a good guy. They all are. I've been around him some from Weston's wedding activities, the bachelor party, etc. I like the guy. He might be the only person who typically has less to say than me. But he's talking now. Weston's brother-in-law, Sutton, says that Ruby brought all that out in Callum when he fell in love with her.

“You know, it's not the worst thing you can do to fall in love with a woman.” He looks at me out of the corner of his eye.

“Yeah, so I keep hearing,” I say, grumbling under my breath, “Not you too.”

Callum laughs. “Yeah, I was opposed to the idea myself until Ruby pulled into town.”

“Pulled in?” I ask.

He points at the RV across the yard. “Broke down in that thing right in front of my property. She was in a wedding dress. Kind of hard to miss.”

Now I'm laughing and intrigued. “That's quite a story. How did you get her to marry you? ”

“Well, she was stuck here for a few days. The part needed to repair it wasn't around for the old thing, which is nicer than a house inside, by the way. But it gave us time to get to know each other. She's the best thing that ever happened to me.” He looks at Ruby, a small smile playing on his lips, the sorry sucker. “Love, I wouldn't knock it,” he says in his gruff voice. “And the way that woman just looked at you, I see potential there.”

I groan. “All you guys, once you get married, want to pass off love to everybody else. Some of us just aren't cut out for it.”

Callum turns and gives me an assessing look. “We're all cut out for love, Bowie. Every single one of us. If you think you don't deserve it, it's probably because you deserve it more than anyone.”

He tilts his head up and walks away, leaving me to think about that.

My phone buzzes and the timing is ironic after what I’ve just heard.

Mom

I’m worried about your dad. Can you come?

My mom is worried about my dad every other week, and that’s not to say that I’m not. My dad has been an alcoholic from as far back as I can remember. My mother hoped leaving Austria when I was a kid would magically cure him of it, but vodka is his first and only love, always will be.

I’m in Landmark Mountain right now. Is he in the hospital?

Mom

You know I can’t get him to go to the hospital .

That lets me know the situation isn’t too dire or she would’ve called an ambulance by now.

The McGregors went back to Silver Hills already and I’ve given them the day off, but I’ll see if Mrs. McGregor is able to watch Becca when we get home and come over.

It’s not easy taking Becca to my parents’ house. I don’t like her being around the dysfunction, and my parents aren’t exactly the loving grandparent types either. It’s not a great feeling when you know your parents would rather not be around your child. They’re not mean to Becca, they’re just uncomfortable, and because they’ve made so little effort to become more comfortable with her, I choose to not put her in that situation as much as I can help it.

“You okay?” Henley comes over and stands by me.

“Yeah.”

Rhodes is not far behind him, moving to my other side. “Fun having Poppy around, right?”

Rhodes has been pushing for me to pursue Poppy since the day I met her at Twinkle Tales. It’s my bad luck that he was there when we first met because the guy does not let a matter drop.

“Can’t say I love it,” I say.

“Why the hell not? She’s great,” Rhodes says.

Just then, Becca takes Poppy’s hands and they dance around the yard. My chest gets a weird pinch as I watch them.

“Don’t start, okay?” I mutter.

Poppy and Becca stop dancing and Poppy fans her face despite the chill in the air. She turns and her eyes meet mine, and the elation in her eyes dims.

“Holy shit.” Rhodes laughs. “What did you do?”

“You don’t want to know.” I sigh .

Penn and Weston walk over.

“Don’t want to know what?” Penn asks.

Fuck me.

When I feel all their eyes on me, I throw my hands up. “We’re not going there, okay? This is not a Single Dad Players meeting right now.”

“Sounds like it should be,” Rhodes says.

Henley’s the one my eyes can’t avoid. They all know me well, but Henley and Rhodes know me better than anyone.

“Next meeting, you’re talking,” Henley says, pointing at me.