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CHAPTER ELEVEN

Phoenix

When Hazel came outside and said there was a family meeting, that Noel needed to talk to everyone, I knew it had something to do with Adonis. Otherwise, why would I be included?

I kept my head down and sat where Hazel told me to.

Noel was facing everyone, and it occurred to me that once upon a time I’d liked the spotlight.

I’d wanted everyone looking at me, seeing me dance.

It had filled my heart with so much joy.

I knew now it had been selfish vanity of an unworthy person.

Noel didn’t appear comfortable as he shot me a quick smile and told everyone to be sensitive. He was very handsome, though, unlike me. He deserved to be seen.

I listened as he explained how he’d “not so legally” hacked places he shouldn’t have. He did his best to glaze over the dead people, but time slowed as he described how they’d died, what he’d done to them after that…how they’d been frozen for months.

Hazel had her hand in mine, her grip tightening as Noel oh, so carefully described it all. I knew he’d killed them. I was told as much…but…the how…that there were some in a freezer now…

I closed my eyes, trying to push away the thoughts that always threatened to suck me into the dark places.

“Phoenix.” Noel said my name so softly. “You still with me?”

I looked up at him; his sunglasses were perched on top of his head, a tender expression directed at me.

“Yeah,” my throat cracked out.

“Good. JJ and I believe that Agent Rose will likely ask you to listen to some voices. As they track down the men that purchased the embalming fluid, knowing a voice is all you heard, it’s likely their next avenue.”

“I’m not subjecting my brother to ever hearing that fucking monster’s words again; no way!” Hazel argued.

“And it’s a horrible thing to ask of him but, Hazel…” Noel crouched in front of her. “It’s not your choice.”

She huffed and hung her head for a second before turning to face me. “Nixy, you don’t have to do a damn thing you don’t want to.”

Noel stood and stepped back. My hand was still trapped in hers, and the room was horribly silent.

“It’s okay, Hazel.”

“It’s not, and you know it. You don’t have to say that just because you think it’s the right thing to say or do.”

“Fine. It’s not okay, but I’ll do it.”

Her mouth was agape. “What?” She turned to Aziza. “Is any of this a smart idea?”

Aziza had her hands folded on her lap; she was only a few feet from us. “I think whatever Phoenix feels he wants to do should be encouraged.”

“What if he spirals?”

Aziza shrugged. “What if he does? Hazel, Phoenix is the first to admit his head is a mess. His words, he told me. If he’s making a decision about anything, from this to what he wants to drink, I absolutely support that, and if he has any problems, he’s never alone.”

“Hazel, it’s fine. If they need me to listen to voices, I will.” I sighed and squeezed her hands.

“If,” she said. “Noel and JJ may be wrong.”

There was a snort behind me, and I looked over my shoulder at Nick.

“Sorry.” He held up his hands. “I just learned early on, like in the womb, not to bet against Noel.”

Matt slapped him on the shoulder, and the little display seemed to lighten the mood of the room.

After that, everyone shared their thoughts about what Noel had said and instead of tuning them out, I found myself really listening.

“I didn’t find anything within the FBI or police department indicating this guy is even looking for Phoenix. While that’s great, I don’t want anyone thinking about getting lazy or for Hazel and Phoenix to pack up and go home. You’re both safest here.” Everyone agreed with Noel.

Honestly, I didn’t want to go home. Wherever that was. My apartment was rented to someone else, I’d been told. Hazel had my belongings. It wasn’t a hardship being here. Even though it was bustling with people, there were plenty of places to be alone if I needed it.

“I’d prefer you all don’t even consider leaving until this guy is caught, but I know Hazel wants to go to the shop to visit with Lizzy.” He looked at her. “You go with some of the guys every time,” JJ said.

“Agreed.” Angel motioned to Aziza. “What are your thoughts on this crazy guy?”

I looked at her, immediately curious about her input.

She walked over to where Noel stood, ever sure of herself.

“I think he’s smart. Has incredible resources that aren’t easily accessible to the common person.

I can’t comment much on where or how he’s getting what he needs, or how he’s hiding people.

I can only go on what Noel’s said here today and what Phoenix has shared. ”

“Anything you can give us,” Mason urged.

“Well, he’s a killer of beautiful people, brainwashes his victims into thinking they’re ugly, unintelligent, worthless.

Then he kills them and poses them to look like gorgeous dolls.

It’s contradictory, if you break it down.

If he wants them to feel ugly, why make them outwardly stunning?

Why not let the world see them how he does? ”

“Are you asking us? Because if you are, you’ll be waiting awhile. We fight crazy, we don’t understand it,” Shep answered.

“No, of course. It’s complex, though.” Aziza motioned to me.

“You’ve said he wore a mask. Sure, it could be like we’ve all said—that he was cautious.

In case someone escaped, or was freed, they couldn’t identify him.

But then why not a plain, boring mask? He chose to look like the dolls he displays. Like he wishes he were beautiful.”

“You think he’s disfigured?” Hazel’s eyes were wide. “He’s angry at the pretty people?”

“Possibly.” Aziza sighed. “It’s hard to say. The human psyche is a labyrinth of possibilities.”

It was quiet, and something Aziza and Hazel said made me realize that I had to tell them what I’d kept secret.

“He made me call him Adonis.” My voice was a whisper, but I knew everyone heard me.

“Adonis?” Aziza asked. “In Greek mythology, Adonis was a beautiful young man. Later, he was killed by a wild boar only to be reborn again as a god—symbolizing the cycle of life, death, and rebirth.” She nodded. “His victims are beautiful, he kills them, and the display is the rebirth.”

“But he asks them to call him that.…The cycle was the god Adonis’s.” Noel shook his head. “It doesn’t make sense.”

“If he was disfigured and never able to repair what was done to him…I believe he was once very stunning. Maybe he was ridiculed, and he likes to break his victims the way he was broken. Then tries to give them the rebirth he never got.” Four didn’t speak often, but lately he’d had a lot of great things to say and what he was saying right now made an eerie kind of sense with what everyone else was adding.

“Very possible.” Aziza nodded.

“Only thing is, we can’t share that with the authorities, otherwise they’ll ask how we know what we do.” Matt sighed.

“True.” Aziza smiled. “But I know what the media has posted, and I can use what Phoenix has shared to build enough of a profile to share with Agent Rose when we see him again.”

“Thanks, Aziza.” Noel smiled back at her. “Okay, I think that’s enough for today. I’m going to continue to keep an eye on the FBI and the police. If anything else springs up, I’ll let you know.”

“Be smart, don’t get caught,” were Angel’s parting words.

Noel grinned, and the gleam in his eye made my lips twitch for the first time.