Page 40 of Want It All

Am I even alive right now?

I certainly wasn’t breathing as I took in the sight before me.

Sebastian rolled on his side, propping up his chin with one hand as he watched Rose, watched Tristan, watched me through heavy blue eyes.

Fuck, he was even more beautiful naked, his body patterned with dips and shadows that defined his slender muscles.

A line of golden hair trailed from his belly button down like a mouthwatering arrow pointing to his still-hard cock.

It was beautiful, too; long and thick and slightly curved, shining with Rose’s slick and his own cum.

I wanted my mouth on him so badly that my lips twitched. I lifted a hand to my face to check I wasn’t drooling.

Rose smiled in a way that suggested she knew what I was thinking, but if she knew that , I doubted she’d still be in the room.

She was glorious, her cheeks flushed pink, her hips reddened from where Sebastian’s fingers had dug into her flesh as she rode him.

Her eyes were lidded and dark as they fixed on mine and my alpha clawed at me, more insistent than I’d ever known before.

She spread her knees in an invitation that almost had me dropping to my own.

She was pink between her legs, too, and swollen, glistening where Sebastian’s release was leaking from her body.

It was obscene and erotic and the most seductive thing I’d ever seen.

I wanted to lick and suck until she was clean and writhing, and then I wanted Sebastian to make her messy all over again.

‘Alpha,’ she whispered.

She was talking to me.

Never in my life had I imagined being this lucky.

‘Omega,’ I purred, surprised and relieved when my voice didn’t break. It had dropped an octave and was gravelly enough to pave a fucking driveway, but Rose shivered at the sound, so I wasn’t about to complain. ‘Are you inviting me in, beautiful?’

‘Yes.’ Rose bit her bottom lip – as though I needed more reason to go to her, as if her naked body and flushed skin wasn’t draw enough. ‘I want you, alpha. Need you.’

If my ego wasn’t already sky-fucking-high from her invitation, it might have rocketed to the stars after hearing that .

I pulled off my boots and socks – why was taking shoes off always so fucking unsexy?

– and ignored the way Tristan’s breath caught when I tugged my shirt over my head.

Having my scent match so close but still being so fucking angry at him made me feel as if my insides were made of crepe paper and I was being slowly torn to shreds.

I simultaneously wanted to offer him my neck – and other places – and punch him in the face, and I was sure he was feeling something similar towards me.

But this wasn’t about him. Not yet, anyway.

After the scent party, I expected that somehow, my life would always be about Tristan Grace, but I tried to push the thought aside as the alpha inside me fixed on Rose with an unnerving focus.

Mine , he growled, and I didn’t disagree. I wanted both the omegas with a fire that – for the first time in years – made me feel whole.

I sank to my knees.

Rose’s eyes widened and she inhaled. I caught a hint of her sweet scent in the air as I crawled towards her. My mouth immediately watered; I wanted it stronger, wanted it spread over my tongue, sliding down my throat. I wanted it to fill my lungs and cover my skin.

She whimpered, and I realised that I was less crawling and more prowling . I’d wanted to show her that I’d do anything for her – that I’d get on my knees for her – but instead I was showing her that even crawling, I was a predator.

I just hoped she knew that I was collared, and that she was holding my leash.

She tilted her head, unconsciously showing me the elegant curve of her throat.

It was pretty now, but it would be even lovelier covered in tooth-shaped scars.

Sebastian would bite over her scent gland, as was his right, but one day, I was going to make a beautiful chain across her silken skin that would tell any other alpha in no uncertain terms exactly who had the honour of belonging to the perfect omega.

If she asked me, I’d leave room for Tristan’s bite.

But only if she asked.

I reached the back of the couches when my vision started to go white.

Fists pummelling, knuckles covered in blood, broken moans rising and falling like music to my ears –

I shook my head slightly, swallowing, trying to brush off the memory.

I was close enough to feel the heat pouring off her; I sat back on my feet, looking down at my omega, at my little queen . I studied her adorable nose, her perfect jaw, her lovely neck. I took in her pink-tipped breasts, her spread knees, and the curve of her soft belly.

Beautiful.

Dragging him from the doorway of his pack house and throwing him down on the grass outside. Picking him up when he stayed down, when he didn’t get to his feet and face me, me , whose life he’d ripped to shreds with one careless decision –

The white spread.

I tried to breathe through it. The rut is normal, Dr. Ford said in my memory. Natural. A rut helps alphas service their omega through a heat. It helps them protect what is most precious to them .

I blinked furiously, trying to will the mist away, but my vision was clouding. The only thing I could see was Rose, in the same way that the only thing I’d seen on that night seven years ago was him , and the blood on my hands.

The rut is normal , Dr. Ford said again.

But what if this wasn’t a rut?

I inhaled, desperate for Rose’s scent and the peace it might bring me, but all I could taste was copper.

‘Alpha?’ she said tentatively, and reached out to touch me.

What if I hurt her?

I reared back, out of reach. The white spread. Tristan was saying my name, and there was a hand on my back that must have belonged to him, warm against my bare skin. Sebastian sat up, moving towards Rose, and –

What if I hurt them?

Once the thought had taken root, I couldn’t shake it. The mist thickened mockingly; I blinked furiously, willing it to disappear.

The rut is normal –

‘Get up!’ I roared at him, my voice shockingly deep and shockingly strong, my dominance carried by my bark. I’d never used it before; it scared me and made my throat feel raw. But he deserved it. ‘Get up!’

He did, somehow. He got to his knees, and his body made all sorts of sounds with the movements, sounds it shouldn’t have made, squishing and cracking and everything wrong.

He was hurt, badly hurt, and I’d done that to him – I’d done it with my fists.

I’d made him this human-shaped pulp, but it wasn’t enough.

It wasn’t enough.

It could never be enough, because he’d taken the most precious thing in the world from me .

‘Alpha?’ Rose said again, her voice breaking through the memories, desperate.

What if I hurt her?

I staggered to my feet, stumbling backwards. I hit Tristan with my shoulder on the way; his expression was half imploring, half understanding. ‘I’m sorry,’ I choked, tearing my eyes away from him, away from them , and stumbling, shirtless and barefoot, to the door. ‘I’m sorry. I can’t.’