Page 8 of Violet Moon (Pitch Mountain Pack #1)

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Sera stopped short before she reached Parisa’s office. Her Alpha wasn’t alone. She held a tiny bouquet of freshly-clipped pansies in her hand and rapped her knuckles on the door.

Wilma was already there. Of course their new Gamma would be a part of their afternoon meeting but she couldn’t shake the sense that her entire day was thrown off now.

Sera opened the door and sat down in a different chair because Wilma was in hers. Parisa had her planner and notebooks out on her desk. Wilma had a binder with bright, colorful tabs that was way more organized than Sera’s red binder full of messy receipts and requests.

Her Alpha paused, noticing the pansies Sera had placed on her desk.

“What sweet, precious things,” Parisa said, placing them in a small vase. Their stems were barely long enough to reach the water line. “This tangerine color is divine. It makes me want to go change into that orange dress I have. That’d certainly turn some heads in the bakery.”

Sera kept glancing between Wilma and Parisa, wondering how she was supposed to act now. When it was just her and Parisa, it was okay to act relaxed around one another, but now she felt like she was on a stage.

“You always turn heads in the bakery without trying,” Sera joked, but she felt the tips of her ears getting red, and she couldn’t seem to get comfortable in this chair.

“I do turn heads with the stern, silent stares that make everyone feel unsettled. Yes, I’d agree with that.” Parisa chuckled. “I provide excellent sweets and treats and subpar customer service.”

Sera caught Wilma’s gaze and the new Gamma dipped her head in a quick nod of respect. Sera toyed with the peeling edge of her binder.

“We were just going over a few bakery needs,” Parisa explained. “Don’t worry. There’s still lots to attend to.”

Wilma perked up at that, tapping her pen on her open binder. “We should dive into the bakery schedule. There’s been a lot of shift trading lately and I looked at who switched when and looked for a pattern. I have a few theories.”

“Couldn’t we just ask them?” Sera asked.

“I hadn’t thought of that, honestly. But this is easier and gets around conversations where you might not get direct responses.”

It was a very Wilma approach. “Let’s hear what you figured out.”

As the meeting stretched on far longer than usual, there were plenty of times when Parisa and Wilma were speaking and Sera felt as though she could leave the room and it wouldn't matter.

Wilma and Parisa approached things similarly. They followed one another’s thinking without needing much explanation. With the pack growing, Parisa needed someone more like herself to help run the pack, someone who had their own life together.

Sera was so much more in control as the wolf. She was stronger, more focused, more tenacious. When she was the wolf, Sera felt like her mind and body were connected in a way she could never achieve as a human. She was present. The past didn’t haunt her.

The cardboard inside her binder bent and Sera realized how tightly she had been clutching it.

As they stood to leave, Parisa asked, “Where’s the color today, azizam ?”

Sera looked down at her comfortable, drab outfit. She grabbed the hem of her vest and flipped up the edges. “There. The lining is blue.”

Parisa clicked her tongue and shook her head. “It doesn’t count if it’s hidden.”

Sera opened her mouth to retort but caught Wilma watching the exchange. Something that was routine was now much too vulnerable and Parisa’s playful disapproval stung more than it made her laugh. She forced out a smile. “If it’s cold enough I’ll wear some bright gloves.”

Parisa’s grin vanished. She stood up straighter, smoothing down the front of her skirt. “Thank you both. Don’t want to keep you longer than I must.” She nodded in Wilma’s direction and the Gamma took her cue to leave.

“Oh, and Sera,” Parisa called after her as she also turned to leave.

Sera looked back over her shoulder to see Parisa chewing her lip as she chose her words.

“Nevermind.” Parisa waved a dismissive hand. “I’ll save it for later. Tea and coffee by the fire tonight?”

Sera relaxed her shoulders and smiled. At least that was the same. “Looking forward to it.”

In the predawn darkness, Sera prepared coffee and a fresh pot of tea and waited for Parisa to come home. She read the same page in her book over and over, unable to focus on anything until she sensed her Alpha was near.

“Welcome home,” she shouted towards the front door.

No reply came. Instead, Parisa emerged from the hallway looking worn. She slumped into her chair and closed her eyes.

“Is everything alright?” Sera asked.

“No. Yes.” Parisa said sharply then broke out into a strangled laugh. “It is what it is.”

“What’s wrong?” Sera asked, hoping she’d finally learn.

Parisa blinked her eyes back open. “Nothing.” She reached for the cup of tea Sera had placed beside her chair and stared down into it without saying a word. Silence stretched on for ages until Parisa sniffled once and looked up again, eyes watery.

Sera froze. Parisa never cried.

“We should start training again,” Parisa said. “I’ve let myself get weak.” She glanced down at her tea. “I think we all have.”

“There’s a lot of ways to be strong,” Sera said.

“Have you finished the book you borrowed from Edgar?” Parisa asked.

Sera got whiplash from the swift change in mood and topic. “Yes. Diah has it now,” she said, still processing what Parisa said before. “He’s got me reading another one now.” She reached for the book beside her and showed it to her.

“Another good one. I think I devoured that book in a couple of days.” Parisa’s voice and posture was stiff, but she was trying to smile. “Want to tell me about where you are in it?”

Sera longed for an easy conversation, for this fireside chat to feel like the hundreds that had come before, so if she had to work for it, she would. “I was shocked at the, uh, level of heat it had in the beginning.” She joked with a forced laugh.

Parisa made an attempt at a playful grin. “When it comes to books, Edgar knows best.”

“Sometimes I need a little more story.”

“And sometimes I need an escape,” Parisa said, tone heavy with what was left unsaid.

Sera reached forward and settled her hand on Parisa’s knee, looking up to meet her gaze. “Pari, I — I don’t know what’s going on, and you don’t have to tell me, but please don’t shut me out. I’m your Beta, but I’m also your friend. If you need anything —”

“This. This is what I need,” Parisa replied, placing her hand on top of Sera’s and slowly rubbing her thumb along the back of her hand. “I need a cup of tea. I need a warm fire. And I need you, azizam . That’s enough for me.”

Sera’s heart fluttered at her honesty. She flipped her palm up and curled her fingers around Parisa’s hand, smiling.

No matter what else was happening, if she could deliver Parisa some flowers in the afternoon and end their nights together in the living room, then everything was okay. “This is all I ever need, too.”