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Kelsey

A fter showering, I made breakfast for Sam and Josie. We had only a few hours to relax before heading to the airport. I looked forward to the week off without travel, even though Sam would be busy with training and home games.

“Ugh, are you telling me you don’t eat real bacon either?” I asked Josie. “Does Jake?”

“Jake eats whatever the fuck he wants to eat,” Josie said with a hint of frustration. “But he pretends to be good in front of Sam, peer pressure and all.”

“And he wants?”

“He’s from the Midwest. Jake would eat meat with a side of meat for every meal if he could. Sausage, ribs, bacon, and potatoes prepared in almost any way you could imagine. And butter, so much butter.”

I sighed, “Too bad Jake wasn’t home now. Then I could prepare a real breakfast. Should I throw in the towel and get twigs and berries?”

Josie laughed and ate the vegetable, egg white omelet with dry, seeded rye toast .

“It’s funny until you start trying to produce enough calories for that chonker, then you realize a little extra fat on your plate goes a long way.”

“I won’t say we have a healthy relationship with food; remember, our mother was a super-model. She watched everything she ate, and we learned bad habits from her. Her body was her livelihood. Her hyper-vigilance rubbed off on us for sure,” Josie explained.

“Food was fuel,” Sam agreed.

“My family loves food; it’s their love language. Thanksgiving dinner wasn’t complete without a dose of self-loathing at the day's end.”

After breakfast, Sam and I brought Crew for a quick swim in the pool before packing and heading to the airport. While we were checking in, I received an Instagram notification that Tom Campbell requested to follow me.

I showed it to Sam once we were seated by the gate, his eyes darting between me and Crew.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“First off, you should accept the follow request; there are a lot of photos of the time he missed. He should be able to see that. Please don’t misread my hesitation. I am trying to accept no longer having you guys all to myself. He has all these rights once that test is done, and I have none.”

Only then did I realize how fast the two weeks would fly between now and when we traveled to Colorado and the West Coast games. I’d moved in, and we’d spent more time away from home than at home. And once we landed in Colorado, our entire world could shift on its axis.

“Can you schedule some time with Anne? We both know what the paternity test is going to show. I’d like to have a plan and a proposal for Tom ready when we meet with him.

The most important part is that he needs to understand that Crew is breastfeeding.

I can’t be away from him for a prolonged period. ”

“He’s in season from the Fall through the winter and into the Spring. Hockey players have worse travel schedules than baseball, and it’s an extended season,” Sam said.

“And I need to fight for you to be able to have a say in this, Sam.”

Sam swallowed hard and was distracted by the airline staff as they started to call our flight.

He stood without responding, scooping Crew and carrying the most oversized items as I pushed the stroller and carried a small diaper bag.

The conversation was over, at least until we landed back in Boston.

Crew was tired from the swim and fell asleep on Sam just after we took off. I watched my boys, and a tear slipped down my cheek.

“Hey,” Sam whispered. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s going to be okay, right?”

“Yeah. It is. We will make sure it will be okay.”