Page 24

Sam

K elsey and Crew were still sleeping when I woke. I was still working through my own emotions after watching the fear and helplessness that she went through in the course of minutes. It wasn’t lost on me that I could easily solve every one of her problems, yet she’d never accept my help.

I texted Monica to see if she could get me on Kelsey’s flight instead of the team charter. I was confident in her ability to do it alone, yet I didn’t want that for her today. Crew started to stir first, greeting the day by smacking his lips and looking for his first meal.

I did a quick Google search, “How to help a mother take care of a baby in the morning.” It must have been a unique question because the responses guided new moms on how to do it themselves.

I did gather that he likely needed his diaper changed and figured it couldn’t be that hard.

I scooped him out of his bassinet, intending to have him changed before Kelsey woke.

I grabbed him a frozen face cloth from the freezer, which he happily chewed on while I struggled to find the supplies in Kelsey’s giant diaper bag. I was still struggling with the snaps on his pajamas when I noticed her leaning against the door well to the bedroom.

“Have you ever done that before?” She asked without judgment.

I frowned, “No, but watching you yesterday, I didn’t realize these snaps would be so difficult.”

“Thank you for trying. Do you want me to help?”

“Can you talk me through it? I want to be able to help you with him.” Her expression was unreadable as she watched me. It took her a second as she absorbed what I had said before she came over to where I was trying and failing to change Crew.

She calmly assessed what I was doing and guided me without hovering over me. Once he was changed, I passed him to her. He wouldn’t be easily distracted with the facecloth much longer. The boy was hungry.

“How did you sleep?” I asked her.

“So good,” she said with a giant sigh. “I’m sorry I panicked last night. He’s never had a fever, and I thought the worst was happening.”

I hesitated before I responded, “I’m glad you didn’t go through that alone.”

She absently held Crew’s hand and watched him as he nursed. I wished I could read her mind when she was quiet and pensive. “Isn’t all this too much for you?”

“If you had asked me that question a month ago, I would have said yes. I know nothing about babies, but it feels natural and comfortable when I’m with you guys. And when you’re not around, I look forward to being with you.”

“He’s young enough now where he won’t remember you if you leave. You said you planned to pursue me, whether I take the deal or not. But please don’t bother if you’re not sure you want to stick around. And yes, I know that’s asking a lot. But I need to watch out for both of us.”

“Understood.”

My phone vibrated with a response from Monica.

Monica: I changed your flight. I will send you an updated boarding pass. You’ve both been checked in.

Me: Thank you.

“That was Monica, my flight has been changed. I’m flying back with both of you.

Monica will also send you an e-mail with the itinerary for the next few weeks.

You don’t need to decide right away, though.

We have a homestand next week, followed by a three-game series in New York.

After that, I’m headed to Texas for the All-Star game and then to spend time with my sister.

On a personal note, if you come to New York or Texas, you will end up meeting my family, and I would like to introduce you as the woman I’m dating. ”

“I’m not comfortable with you paying me.

But I also can’t afford to pay rent, save for school, or support my son if I’m constantly traveling with you.

My parents have been trying to get me to move back home, and stubbornly, I’ve rebelled.

I should be thankful that they can help, but instead, I feel like a giant failure. ”

“Kelsey, the Boston real estate market is insane. It’s not a failure; it’s a smart financial decision.”

“I’m not telling you this to make you feel better; I just want you to understand that I can’t make this decision impulsively. A year ago, if I’d met you and you asked me to follow you, I would have packed my bags without a second thought. If it were just my heart, I’d risk it.”

“Maybe I haven’t been clear, but I’m also at risk. You’re either going to own me or wreck me.”