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15

ATOM

W hat the fuck are they doing in there?

I saw the guy arrive ten minutes ago, wondering who the hell the douche canoe in the silver kitted-out truck was. When I realized it was the guy who’d been bothering Ember that night at the bar, the one who is on the security tapes from the night she was assaulted, I got mad.

To show up here at my club, to step into my clubhouse, on my family’s land, visiting my fucking girl, takes balls of steel or a sincere death wish.

He disappeared inside with Taco, and I’m stuck up here.

“You okay?” Catfish asks, handing me the screwdriver as we fix the lighting in one of the watchtowers that flank the corners of the club.

I’m staring out of the window again, and I try to focus back on the task at hand. “Yeah. Slept like shit at Ember’s.”

Catfish smiles sympathetically. “Yeah. Don’t envy you having responsibility for the president’s daughter.”

I know he doesn’t mean to needle me. Hell, he doesn’t even know how deep my history with Ember goes, but the pointed use of president’s daughter rankles anyway.

“Got enough other shit to do without worrying about her.” I tighten the screw, replacing the panel. It doesn’t feel good, not being honest with a brother. Lying isn’t something I do with those who matter to me. I almost laugh at that because I’ve spent five years lying to myself. Not sure what that says about me. “Now try it.”

Catfish flicks the switch, and the light comes back on. “Fucking A. Nailed it. If you weren’t a rancher, you could be an electrician.”

“I’m a jack of all trades, and master of none.”

I look over to the clubhouse, trying to bury the random thoughts of what is happening inside. Did he kiss her when he saw her? Did she respond?

Did Ember tell him to come visit? I thought she was just going to tell him she didn’t want another date.

Did Ember, Butcher, and Rocco have some kind of fucking family reunion in the bar built from timber my grandpa felled?

Fuck me.

The jealousy catches me off guard, but at least I realize that’s what it is and force myself to find some chill. I remember the summer after I broke Ember’s heart. Saw her walking along Main Street, eating ice cream with some guy wearing beige shorts. Almost crashed my bike into a row of parked cars and had to give myself a talking to about jealousy back then, as well.

I have no reason to be jealous. I have no reason to be angry. Because Ember assured me she was going to end things with Rocco, and I need to believe her.

“You sure you’re okay?” Catfish asks again.

“Just a lot on my mind. I feel like we’ve been back two minutes, and Dad has already messaged me to take a meeting he should be having.” I sigh and put the tools away. “Plus, I’m not sure what those guys’ end game was. They have to know Ember would tell her father. They have to know we’d take steps to stop them getting their money.”

Just as I say the last word, Ember steps out of the clubhouse with Rocco. The summer breeze catches the ends of her hair, and I can almost conjure the scent of her shampoo as I inhale.

God, she’s pretty.

“Wraith said the same thing.”

Jesus! Focus!

“One thing I know for sure, is if we don’t protect the town, they’ll lose faith in us. That doesn’t sit well.”

Neither does the hug between Ember and Rocco that’s longer than fucking lambing season. It’s grinding my last gear.

Rocco gets into the truck and drives down the trail, and it reminds me. I send a quick text.

Me: Vex. You get any details on those vehicle registrations?

Vex: Shit got busy here for a second. Yeah. Got you some details.

The Russian truck comes with a company address in Denver. I’m guessing it’s one of the Bratva businesses and won’t be hard to check.

The second, the flashy car belonging to Rocco, is a rental from Denver airport.

That doesn’t make any sense. I mean, I guess the truck he’s driving today could have been in for a service or some shit, so he hired a car for the night.

Why would a man who lives in the next town over be hiring a car from the airport to take a woman on a date?

Me: Thanks. Any chance you can run this plate too and break into their systems and find out who hired it?

I add the plate from the truck.

Vex: Yeah, but won’t be able to get to it until tomorrow afternoon. That cool?

I worry about what I’m asking. Is this jealous boyfriend shit, or do I have a valid concern? Does it even matter? If Ember tells me she set him straight, then I have no reason to worry.

Except my gut is usually right.

Me: Yeah. No rush. Club business first.

I look to Catfish, who has finished packing up the rest of the tools we used. “Got Vex from New Jersey following up on some shit for us. The truck those guys used to threaten the town? Registered to a company in Denver.”

“You should go tell Butcher,” he says. “I’ll see these tools get put away in the workshop.”

Perfect. Because there’s a woman I need to see. “On it.”

I jog the short distance across the edge of the meadow and follow Ember back into the clubhouse. “Kitchen, now.” My words are blunt when I see her.

She looks up at me, obviously confused by my mood. “Please don’t speak to me like that.”

I raise an eyebrow. “Kitchen.”

Just as she’s about to reply, Butcher comes out of his office into the bar. “Seems like a decent guy. Starting to wonder if he’s got a bit of a death wish, stepping in front of the Bratva, then daring to walk into a motorcycle club uninvited.”

Ember puts her hands on her hips. “According to you, no guy is going to be perfect for me, Dad. If he hadn’t looked out for me in front of the Bratva, you would have called him a coward. You would have told me I deserved someone who is going to protect me. If he’d come to the clubhouse and been meek and lacked confidence, you would have called him a pussy, or some other highly misogynistic word. You would have said whoever I ended up with should have the courage to meet you eye to eye. But the only other person with the balls to look you in the eye would be a biker, just because of who you are, and if I’d shown up with one of those, you would have shot them.”

Butcher laughs. “Calm down, Spitfire. I’m just telling you the guy was okay.”

“Well, I wasn’t asking your permission, and I didn’t bring him here to meet you. That was an accident. He didn’t know he wasn’t supposed to just show up here.”

Butcher shrugs. “Don’t like the idea of you having a boyfriend, but I guess you’re old enough to make your own decisions on these things.”

“Thank you. Yes. I am. But I told Rocco that I don’t see us going anywhere.”

Butcher’s eyes go wide. “What? Why?”

“It was a very intense first date, that’s all. Nice guy. He walked me home. Wasn’t going to invite him in, but then we were attacked, and I didn’t feel right making him drive home alone, given he was hurt.”

Even I can hear the lie.

If Butcher can, he doesn’t show it. “Fuck me, I can’t keep up. I need coffee, and then you and I can finish our conversation.”

He marches off to get coffee, and finally the bar is empty. Just Ember and me.

“You set him straight?” I ask quietly.

Her face softens. “I said I would, didn’t I?”

I tug a hand through my hair. “Then why the fuck were the two of you clinging to each other like shipwreck survivors out there?” I stab my finger in the direction of the lot.

“What?” she asks.

“I saw the two of you, all up in each other’s space.”

Wrinkles of confusion give way to anger. “We were not up in each other’s space. He hoped for more. I said no. He hugged me and then he left. That’s the end of it.”

“But—”

Her eyes flash. “No, Atom. Stop. You’re pissing me off.”

“I know the fucking feeling.”

Her cheeks flush pink, her chest heaves, and even though I know it’s risky, I reach for her and kiss her. In the silence of the bar, I’ll be able to hear Butcher’s stomping footsteps. Guy walks heavier than a Clydesdale. Her lips are firm beneath mine at first. The fist that tries to push me away, finally relaxes and tugs me closer.

I melt into her in the most reckless of ways.

Dicing with death might be a cliché, but in this moment, it’s exactly what I’m doing. In some ways, it ratchets the intensity of feeling her body melt for me. That our need for each other, mixed with the risk of being caught, is the most potent of fuel.

I’m transported to the previous evening. The way her breath would catch, the way she moaned, no, mewled. The way her thighs felt wrapped around my waist. The way blood raced to my cock.

Thankfully, Ember hears the footsteps first and jumps away from me like I’m on fire.

“I’ll message you later,” I say.

“And I might respond if I ever find my phone and you stop acting like a possessive jerk.”

“Em,” I say softly.

“Maybe between now and then, you should consider whether you really want me or whether you want me because someone else did.”

Butcher appears around the corner, still far enough away that he can’t hear us. “That’s not what this is, and you know it.”

“Isn’t it?” She turns to Butcher. “Ready, Dad?”

Butcher nods, and she marches into his office.

The conversation leaves me reeling, and I walk behind the bar to help myself to a glass of whiskey I shouldn’t really drink because I have to head over to the ranch because Dad insists I meet with a cattle breeder interested in putting one of our bulls to stud.

It’s not professional to show up with alcohol on your breath, but given the last twenty-four hours, I feel like I need a shot of something. I slug it down, then pop a stick of gum in my mouth. It’ll have to do in lieu of making it home to my toothbrush.

Butcher puts his hands on his hips. “You able to stay with Ember tonight?”

“You asking me or telling, Prez?” I ask. My old drama teacher would be pleased with this level of performance.

“Telling. You two can barely stand to be in the same room.”

“Hence the question.”

Butcher walks towards me, and I can see Ember watching us carefully from the open doorway to Butcher’s office. “She’s my daughter, Atom. And you’re the only one I can trust her to. I’d rather she were staying with me and not above the goddamn bar. But Wraith’s right. It’s too easy to jump to the obvious answer. That the Bratva are intimidating my town to get to me. It could be me they’re truly after and are using her. So, me being with her would give them a double target.”

“Fine. I’ll stay there again tonight.”

“And be her bodyguard.”

“You better clear this with my father, because now I’m back, I got a sharp reminder from him that I’ve got shit I’m responsible for at the ranch.”

“Will do.”

“Speaking of, I got a meeting at the ranch. Should only be gone ninety minutes. You think you can keep her here while I take care of it?”

Butcher nods. “I owe you, brother. Remember when you used to sneak around the back of the bar and steal alcohol when you thought no one was looking? You’ve grown into a good and loyal man, Atom.”

He turns on his heel and returns to Ember. And I’m left feeling like even more of a fool.

I drive to the ranch and check that one of the hands has brought down Big Don, the bull the breeder is interested in. He’s a fine specimen. Long, thick fur, pedigree, a strong stance, and as fertile as they come. When he snorts through his nose and walks towards me, I smile.

“Don’t be giving me attitude this morning, Don. I know you don’t like being brought in from the fields, and believe me, I feel you. So, I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t need to.”

He snorts and shakes his head. But I know better than to reach over and pet him.

I look over toward the building my father lives in. It’s like succession musical chairs. My grandfather is in the main ranch house, a property way too big for an old man, but the only way we’re getting him out of there is a coffin.

My dad gets the second biggest. A smaller version of the main house. When Dad moves into the main house, I’ll be expected to move into that one, but the truth is, I don’t want it.

It’s too close to the bunk house where the hands sleep. Any problem, no matter how small, the hands go disturb my father. Plus, it’s too close to everything else. The paddock, the barn. It’ll be too hard to switch off on days off.

My place is perfect where it is. About a half mile down the trail. Small, so it takes no time to clean. Separate from the work of the ranch and more connected to the land.

There is privacy around it, which I appreciate.

But it’s the other property I have, the one very few people know about, that I like best.

“You thinking big thoughts?”

My grandpa’s voice is as gnarled as his knuckles. When I turn to look at him, his face is equally weathered. His hair is white as snow and a touch too long beneath his Stetson.

“I don’t want Dad’s house.”

My grandfather places his hands over the wooden gate. “Didn’t think you would. But that’s between you and your dad.”

I roll my eyes. “And we both know he’ll want me there.”

“You’re like a horse that hasn’t been broken, Hudson. You don’t want the bit and bridle that goes with being ridden. You just want to roam and run.”

I tap my Outlaw patch. “That’s why I’m a biker.”

“And one day, you might have to choose. Are you a biker or a rancher? Because I keep the peace between you and your dad. Won’t be able to do that forever. He’s already started to pull away from the club, just like I did, as his responsibilities here increased. That’s your future too.”

“He takes those responsibilities you’re giving him now and passes ‘em straight on to me. He wants the money, but not the work. When it’s my turn, when I’m older, I’ll do what I have to for the ranch. But I won’t reduce my club commitment to do all the work for him, while he maintains control and does whatever he likes. I have plans for the ranch when it’s my turn, and I don’t want him ruining it before I have my time.”

My grandpa nods. “I see it.”

We stand in silence, watching Big Don walk around, stomping his hoof into the dirt and snorting snot around like it’s a ticker tape parade.

“Doesn’t it bother you?”

“Of course it does. I didn’t build this ranch into what it is so your dad could sell it to the highest bidder.”

I swipe a bandana across the back of my neck. It’s going to be a hot day. “But you’re gonna hand the ranch to him anyway?”

“It’s the way it’s always been.” Grandpa slaps me on the shoulder, more firmly than his wiry frame should be capable of. “I’ll take care of your future, Hudson. You need to trust me.”

And I know better than to ask how. Because my grandfather is a man of his word.

I just can’t imagine what he’ll do.