Page 58

Of Moose and Men

T hey were like an assembly line. A well-oiled machine.

They could properly gauge each other’s next movement and thought.

Poet tossed three more fresh catfishes into the bucket.

Running the knife beneath the hot stream of water, she grabbed one of the fish that was drying on the rack and began removing the scales like an expert. Kage stood beside her, chopping onions.

‘Pride and Joy’, by Stevie Ray Vaughan poured from the speakers, pumping the bluesy sound throughout his kitchen.

They worked in tandem, preparing a nice dinner.

He’d spent a few hours fishing by his river early that morning before work, and she came over after her long workday so they could get their weekend started right.

“Is your period over?”

“Gotdamn, Kage, how many times are you going to question me about this?!” She chortled, looking a cross between exasperated and outraged, though she laughed all the same. “You’ve been asking me that all week!”

“And now I’m askin’ today!”

“Don’t think I forgot about you callin’ a few days ago to tell me you got busy and couldn’t come by after I told you I had to stop by the drugstore and pick up some pads. Suddenly, something came up, huh?!” She rolled her eyes. “Liar. You ain’t shit.” She laughed.

“What was the point of me drivin’ all that way if you weren’t going to put out?

” She leaned back and placed her hand on her hip, aghast. “I mean, I love you and all, but let’s not play make-believe here.

Pussy is supposed to be part of the package,” he teased, moving out of the way when she tried to reach over and pinch him.

“Is it finally gone? I’m serious. It has to end sometime.

You’re not Jesus… it shouldn’t go on for forty days and forty nights.

” The woman visibly sucked her teeth and began scraping the fish incredibly hard.

“When I tried this before, you stopped me. I said, hell, we can just put down a towel, but you didn’t want that, because you don’t like havin’ intercourse on your period.

I respected your wishes, and said fine, I’d wait.

I’ve waited each and every time, and now I want to have sex with my girlfriend. Is that a crime?”

“In the criminal justice system, sexually based harassment by a man named Kage Wilde during his girlfriend’s cycle is considered especially heinous.

In Houston, Texas, the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious aggravations towards Poet Constantine are members of an elite squad known as the Special Victims Unit. These are their stories. Duh! Duh!”

They both cracked up.

“Yes… if you must know,” she dramatically rolled her eyes, “it’s over. That reminds me of an anecdote I heard. You wanna hear a gross joke?” she asked with a cheeky smile. Her eyes fixed on the floppy fish as she tenderly grazed it with the sharp side of her knife.

“Gross? I don’t know if I do.” He smirked then grabbed a green pepper and began slicing it, too.

“A vampire walks into a bar and goes up to the bartender. He says, ‘Hey, I’d like a cup of hot water, please.’ The bartender looks at him in confusion and responds, ‘A cup of hot water? I thought you guys only drank blood?’ The vampire held up a bloody tampon and said, “Tonight I am having tea!’” She leaned into the counter, cracking herself up.

All he could do was stare at her writhing about, turning red.

“That’s really sick. I like it.” He chuckled. “Okay, my turn. What did the right pussy lip say to the left pussy lip?”

“I don’t know. What?”

“We used to be tight until you let that big dick cum between us.”

Poet looked at him. Blinked several times. Then burst out laughing.

“That was sooooo bad, Kage!”

“Oh, like yours was any better! Okay, I’ve got another one. What did—” His cellphone rang on the kitchen counter, interrupting them. “Hold on a sec, baby. It’s my cousin, Phoenix… Yeeeellow. Hey man, how are ya?”

“Nothin’ much, wildebeest of the jungle. Whatcha up to?”

“Makin’ dinner with my girlfriend. Us Sasquatches are known to do that from time to time. What’s up?”

“Oh, this is probably a bad time then. Did I interrupt anything? Like y’all fuckin’?” He chuckled in that lazy, easy way he always did.

“I said we were makin’ dinner, not whoopee. Bad time for what ?”

“Kage, you show your age every day. Who says makin’ whoopee anymore besides our parents?”

He laughed.

“And you show your ass every day, so what’s the difference?” Kage grinned. “What do you want, Eric Clapton Jr.?”

“I fixed your motorcycle is all. I was gonna bring it by. I can come over another day though. I was just askin’ ’cause I was gonna be performin’ at a club ’bout thirty minutes from there tonight, and figured I could drop it off beforehand.”

“Oh, that was fast. Cool. No sweat. Yeah, you can do it. ’Round what time?” Kage reached for a larger knife, and started chopping another pepper.

“Oh, in a few hours or so. Is that cool? I’ll just be in and out.”

“Sounds fine to me. You can meet my lady, Poet, then too.”

“It’ll be my pleasure.”

Okay, see ya then.”

“Cool. See ya in a bit.” Phoenix ended the call.

Kage set his phone back down and tried to recall what joke he was going to tell Poet before the phone rang, when she said, “You called your cousin Eric Clapton Jr.”

“Mmm hmm. Can you hand me my colander, baby?”

She grabbed it from a lower cabinet and handed it to him. “Why’d you call him that?”

“Remember? I told you we could go line dancin’ when he performs? Phoenix can sing.”

“Oh yeah, that’s right! He can really get down, huh?”

“Baby, Phoenix is an amazin’ fuckin’ singer.

I can’t take that away from him. He has this voice that just sends chills through you.

He sings mostly rock, blues, and country, but has been known to dabble in other genres, too.

He also can play a bunch of instruments.

He’s a skilled mechanic. Got a degree in business finance, or somethin’ like that.

Smart and talented guy. He does the singing more as a hobby. Local gigs and whatnot.”

She nodded in understanding.

“Seems like you’ve got an accomplished family, Kage.

You said your cousin Lennox owns a successful gym, his wife is a lawyer, and they just had a baby.

Your other cousin, Roman, is some big Wall Street guy, and he just got married.

” He nodded, a big smile on his face. He couldn’t help it, hell, he was proud of them.

“Phoenix is talented beyond belief, and he’s smart, too.

Then there’s you… An amazing artist and hunter with your own home repair and home addition company.

Something is in the Wilde blood, that’s for sure. ”

He shuddered on the inside at her choice of words that reminded him of Grandpa.

They finished cooking dinner. He made the salad and sautéed the fish, while she prepared mashed potatoes, jalapeno cornbread, and homemade chocolate chip cookies.

I can’t believe this beautiful woman is in my house, makin’ dinner with me.

I can’t believe she’s mine. But she is. It’s real nice havin’ some feminine energy around, and not just for one night.

They sat down at his kitchen table and ate, telling stories and sharing laughs while sharing a bottle of tequila.

The sounds of Rome’s, ‘Swords To Rust Hearts To Dust’ flowed through the room.

He memorized the curl of her lips, and the way her head fell slightly forward as she resisted the urge to laugh at some of the silly things he would say.

He sketched her secrets and hid them away behind his heart, protected and secured forever.

He buried her troubles, and planted new seeds of hope.

When they were all finished feasting and drinking, she helped clear the table and wash the dishes.

Once her hands were dry, he caught her staring at him from the corner of her eye.

He pulled her against him. His tongue found hers, and his fingers roamed her tresses as he held her tight about the waist. They fumbled about, clothing discarded on the floor, nearly tripping over their messy mounds of apparel.

They managed to make it up the stairs up to his bedroom, barely able to tear away from one another.

She practically leapt onto the bed, resting on her elbows as he stood at the end of the bed, and made to remove his boxers.

She rose up and yanked them down his legs, then sat on the edge of the mattress, taking his hard dick into her hands.

Eyes wide open, she took him into her hot, wet mouth, and wrapped her full, soft lips around the sensitive head.

He groaned as she worked her way from the tip to the base, all while massaging his balls with a gentle hand.

“Mmmm, nice job, princess. You suck your man’s dick so good, baby… You turn me the fuck on.”

Her cheeks hollowed as she sucked him harder. He gripped the back of her head, fucking her face with shallow thrusts.

“You look so beautiful sucking that big dick, sweetheart… Choke on my cock, baby…”

He pushed her head further down onto his groin, driving his length to the back of her throat. She gulped and swallowed hard, her head moving faster and faster. Spittle and precum dripped from her mouth as she made a meal of his sword.

“Damn, you are so sexy, possum…”

The tickle of sweat began, his hairline was moist and his leg muscles taut.

His grunts and moans climbed over the music playing throughout the house—bluesy rifts, and dark country melodies with solemn vibes.

Then, he kissed the top of her head, and eased himself out of her mouth.

He didn’t want to cum just yet. Taking her into his arms, he devoured her earlobe, making her laugh and squirm before drifting farther down her sweet, heavenly human canvas.