Page 43 of The King’s Man (The Kingdom of the Krow #3)

~ DIADRE ~

I could sense the tension in Jann as we spent the following hours preparing to travel. It was a surreal sensation to remain side-by-side as we gathered, packed, informed, and whispered plans, our hands bound.

In moments when he was distracted by conversations or responsibilities that didn’t require my attention, I’d catch myself staring at our bound wrists, marveling that this was even real. Then I’d follow the length of his arm with my eyes, climbing to his shoulder, then his jaw and—

‘As much as I appreciate the admiration of my mate, you’re making it difficult for me to focus, Dee.’

God, I loved it when he called me Dee.

Tearing my gaze from him, I avoided his eyes, knowing that when I met that golden gaze the desire already thrumming in my belly would surge and that was the opposite of what he needed right now.

But as the conversation rolled to a close with one of the Officers he was preparing for their command in his absence, he shifted his weight closer until his thigh brushed me.

The Neph saluted, hesitated, then nodded once to me before turning on his heel and jogging off to fulfill his orders.

I blew out a breath as Jann turned his bound hand to grip mine tightly like we might still be torn apart. He led me back to his tent, his body tight and the bond humming.

“I want nothing more than to ignore everything but you,” he muttered under his breath as he strode the trail between tents and I trotted at his side. “But, sadly, we have a choice to make, mate.”

I loved it when he said that, too—even though that little scream of anxiety in the back of my mind suggested I liked it too much. I was far too willing to trust and it had burned me in the past. I needed to take care with my heart.

Jann looked down at me sharply because I hadn’t responded. I cleared my throat. “What, um, what choice?” I asked breathlessly.

Please say we need to—

“We need to be out of camp before first light. We’re about to be alone in the tent. I could take you—quickly. Thoroughly,” he growled, with a sideways glance when my tummy tightened. “Or… we could leave earlier and wait until we’ve put some distance between us and camp, and we are truly alone.”

I glanced up at him, my breath growing shallow. I licked my lips and his eyes dropped to watch.

“Or… I suppose the other option is… both?” I whispered. “Unless you’re too tired—”

Jann hissed a curse and a giggle burst out of me when he whipped our bound arms around my back and pulled me off my feet, picking me up and running me back to the tent.

“Careful, Dee,” he growled in my ear, then nipped my neck as I dangled helplessly from his arms. “Don’t force me to make an example of you for disrespect to your elders.”

I snorted. “You’re not that much older than me.” It was true. There was twelve years between Yilan and Melek, only six or seven between Jann and I. But I found that as my fear of him dissolved slowly, like sugar on my tongue, I enjoyed teasing him more and more.

There was a moment, as he carried me to the tent, muttering about the things he’d do to me to make his point, that I hooked my free arm around his neck and smiled, because I had a picture in my head—all four of us.

Yilan and I, Melek and Jann, at a private dinner in the Palace of Theynor.

The servants only intruding long enough to bring our food and drinks, otherwise leaving us alone.

And for a moment I was breathless imagining the joy of sharing friendship with my mate along with my best friend and her mate.

Like a family.

My heart pinched as Jann lowered his shoulder to push through the flap into his tent, and he shuddered to a halt, letting me slide down his body as he placed me back on my feet, his eyes searching mine.

“What is it? What made you ache?” he whispered. “I was joking about the punishment. If you don’t like things—”

“I love all your ideas,” I said with a watery smile, patting his chest with my free hand. “I envisioned the future with you and Melek and Yilan and… and I liked it, Jann. I liked all of us together and working for the same thing and… and being friends.”

He went still, his head tilting.

So I showed him. In his mind. He blinked and his eyes widened—but then glazed as he sank into the vision of the four of us on Yilan’s balcony, eating and drinking, laughing and teasing…

When I removed the image, he cleared his throat and his eyes focused on me again. “I suppose I hadn’t thought that far ahead,” he said a moment later, his voice gruff. “But… God, I like that too.”

I nodded, smiling. “We have to do this, Jann. We have to do this right. We have to make sure they win. The life we could have if… if we could just be at peace. I can see it and… it makes me excited for the future. I haven’t felt that way for a long time.”

He gave a low rumble in that drum of a chest and leaned down, opening his mouth on mine and sliding his free hand into my hair, pulling me into the kiss so that all thoughts of our friends and the future slipped from my head as my body responded to his touch and his tongue and the thrill of having him close and alone.

He’d flicked open my top two buttons and slid his hand inside, over my breast. I was arching into the touch and reaching for his leathers, wondering how I’d get them undone with one hand, when the sound of canvas snapping, was quickly followed by a curse and a quiet but high-pitched, “I’m sorry to interrupt… ”

Jann and I broke apart—him whirling to stand between me and the intruder while I hurriedly fumbled at my buttons with my free hand because he’d gone for a blade with his free hand and his spear with the one bound to mine.

But he relaxed almost immediately. “Yilan,” he muttered as if he weren’t happy, but also not afraid. He slipped his weapons back into their sheaths with a glance at me over his shoulder.

“I’m sorry. I know this is a… fraught time,” she said carefully. “But I need to speak to both of you.”

Jann frowned. “Where’s Melek?”

“He’s speaking with some of the guards—I shadow walked. I’ll return to him in a moment. But—”

“You shouldn’t be unaccompanied,” Jann growled.

Yilan put both fists on her hips and glared.

“I didn’t come for your advice,” she snapped, then dropped her hands, shaking her head and blowing out a breath.

“Jann, I’m… I’m trying to… I don’t want you two to leave with tension between us.

” Then she looked at me. “And I don’t want you to feel like you have to…

to choose your loyalty between me and your mate.

If that’s ever… if there’s ever a choice, there is no choice, Diadre.

You know that right? I wouldn’t even question but to choose Melek first every time.

And if you’re… if you two are soulbound, I’d expect the same from you. ”

“If?” Jann growled.

Yilan shot him another unimpressed look. “You’ve been bristling and growling and pissed at me since the first moment you found us in Theynor—”

“Because I learned you were capable of drugging and kidnapping my best friend, stealing him from his people, and imprisoning him.”

“She didn’t have any choice,” I whispered from beside him, wincing when he shot me a look.

Yilan folded her arms and I thought she’d lash him with that tongue of hers, but to my surprise, she took a deep breath, looked Jann right in the eye, and humbled herself. “Forgive me,” she said quietly.

Even Jann seemed startled by that.

Yilan swallowed and continued. “I know how that looked and how it must have felt—”

“I don’t think you do.”

“Yes, Jann, I do. I know how I would feel if you’d done the same.

And I… I want to recognize that even though I wouldn’t change it.

I should have… should have found a way to leave you some reassurance or…

or look, it doesn’t matter now because it’s done.

I’m here because I don’t know when we’ll get to see you both face to face again after tonight, and I don’t want this hanging over all of us like a cloud.

Jann, I am sorry that I stole Melek away, and frightened you.

I’m sorry I deceived you. I like you—and I thought you liked me too. ”

“I did until you—”

He grunted when I elbowed him sharply. ‘She’s a Queen, and she’s humbling herself. Don’t kick dirt in her face. I would have done the same for you—and I daresay you would have too, in her position.’

Jann’s jaw rolled and his lips twisted like he tasted something sour. But he nodded at Yilan. “I do like you, Yilan,” he said finally. “I’ve been worried and not thinking. You’re right. Diadre and I were talking about how it could be for the four of us when all of this is done and we’re at peace…”

“Family,” I offered with a smile.

Yilan’s brows rose. “That’s… that’s exactly what I hope, too,” she said softly.

“But I also know that we have a long road to get there. And the last of my blood family is out there in the hands of… of men I don’t even want to think about,” she breathed.

“Please, Jann… please don’t punish her for the ways I’ve hurt you.

Please, give her every bit of the loyalty and care you’d give Gall—”

“I wouldn’t even consider otherwise,” he growled, and I felt the pinch of offense in his chest. Before he could launch at her with his words, I gripped his hand tightly and rubbed his arm to reassure him.

‘Don’t be offended. I know you won’t let either of them down.’ I sent him quickly. I could feel his single-mindedness. His purpose and desire to fulfill it. ‘She’s so scared. She just needs reassurance,’

‘She assumes I’m selfish and petty,’ he growled back, but his expression towards Yilan softened.

“Be at peace, Yilan,” he said gruffly. “If nothing else, be certain that I know if Gall is alive, he would not rest until Istral is safe—and if he isn’t, it’s our duty as his brothers to avenge him.

And protect his mate. I won’t stop until we’re certain both of them are safe, or dead—and their deaths avenged. ”

Yilan’s throat bobbed and her eyes shone. “Thank you,” she whispered. “And… and I want you to be sure that… no matter what… we work for your safety as well. You and your mate, too,” she said hoarsely.

I’d thought Yilan was only offering him her gratitude. The general reassurance of a Ruler in thanks for his. But I felt the jolt in Jann, as if the words meant something much more. I looked at him quickly, but he stared at Yilan, and when I opened my mouth to ask, his voice rang in my head.

‘Hush. I’ll explain later.’

I frowned, but kept the words to myself.

What had I missed? What was going on?

*****

Two hours later, in the darkest part of the night, Jann and I crept out of his tent. Most of the Neph were bedded down, but the patrols, guards, and even some of the servants and messengers remained awake and working.

Jann had emphasized how crucial it was that we get out of the camp without anyone seeing us.

So I would walk him in the shadows with me.

It would take a lot of energy, and I’d been worried since we hadn’t yet slept, and it had been a huge day.

But I was surprised by how my body seemed…

invigorated. When we had our bags and rations strapped to our backs, and our weapons sheathed, we turned to each other.

I found I was thrilled. I’d always fantasized about being alone on a mission with my mate.

I’d never thought it would actually happen. But here we were.

“Are you sure you have everything you need—your herbs? Anything else?”

I nodded quickly. I’d made the mistake of not taking enough herbs with me into the field in the past. I wouldn’t do it again. Not now. And I’d replenish any when we passed apothecaries in the cities. “I’m sure.”

Jann stared down at me and took a deep breath. “How do we do this?”

“You have to be touching me—the more of our bodies that touch, the better. And we need to move quickly. I have the strength to do this, but it will wear on me quickly.”

Thankfully, even the moon hid most of its light tonight. The shadows outside were deep and dark if we avoided the fires.

“How will we see if we’re—”

I grinned. “You’ll see and move fine. It’s others who won’t see you.”

The unease on his face made me want to laugh—such a cocky fighter. Just a kitten about magik.

He swallowed hard. “How do you stop yourself sinking into the earth?” he asked with the stifled fear of a child.

God, I wanted to tease him so badly.

“You’ll still be here, Jann. I don’t pretend to know all the things God gave us, or how they work.

But I know this: Be careful not to touch anything—unless I’ve intended for us to pass through something, you’ll still hold space in the world, whether they can see you or not.

If you bump into a weapons stack, or kick a stone I didn’t pass through, they’ll still move. ”

He nodded, his expression softening as he looked down to where our wrists were bound together and slid his fingers between mine. “I suppose we should get moving. We can travel for a couple of hours before the sun rises.”

My breath grew tight then when he raised his gaze to meet my eyes.

“Are you ready? Really ready, Dee? Do you trust me? Because the only people we’re going to have to rely on for the duration of this is each other.”

I swallowed hard, that little voice in the back of my head, screaming caution. But I nodded. Because the much stronger conviction thrummed between us in that glowing cord that anchored my soul to his.

“I’m ready.”

More than ready, in fact. I was eager. Because we would be alone.

Finally, truly alone . The thought of leaving behind this horde of beast-men and their alpha-male bullshit was a relief on its own.

But to go in the arms of my mate and to have the freedom to explore that.

To explore him while still fulfilling my purpose.

“Let’s do this.”