CHAPTER 18
“It was my mother.” The moment Kian opened his mouth, the words poured out of him. “I was six when she died.” Alec didn’t comment, letting him get it out in his own time.
“There was a man in our apartment. There were always different men there, but each time she made me hide in the closet. She would put headphones over my ears, playing a DVD from my favorite movie, Mulan. I had to promise her each time to keep my eyes on the movie until she came and got me. This time hadn’t been any different.”
A shudder crept down his body. “I tried to obey. I really did, but she was screaming so loudly, I had to see what was wrong.” Alec’s arms tense around him as he told his story. “Since I promised to not leave the closet, I looked through the slats.”
The image was there in front of him as if he were once more there in that closet. “He kept hitting her over and over. There was so much blood,” Kian’s voice trailed off as the memories of that day flooded his brain. “I was so scared.” His voice broke as uncontrollable sobs wracked his body. Burrowing into Alec’s warmth for comfort, Kian heard his reassuring words soothing him.
Slowly, a calming force infused his body, slowing the tears until Kian once more could find his voice. “When he finally stopped beating her, he yelled something, I can still hear it but I have no idea what he said. Someone in one of the nearby apartments knocked on the walls and screamed about calling the police.”
A shudder went through him. “The sound had made him turn his head to look my way. His face was mean and…” He wasn’t sure if he should admit the next part as no one had ever believed him in the past.
But Kian needed to get everything out, even if Alec laughed. “His eyes glowed red.”
Alec’s hand stopped its gentle stroking for a moment. Kian feared he was going to scoff at the words as a young child’s imagination. But then his hand continued to move through his hair. His lips pressing against the top of his head. “I’m so sorry you went through that.”
Relief poured through Kian that he hadn’t laughed or told him it sounded crazy. Alec’s kindness spurred him to continue. “When he was gone, I left the closet crawling on my hands and knees to my mother. She wasn’t moving. Blood was everywhere.” Kian shuttered. “I curled up next to her.”
The last part hurt so much, Kian hesitated before finishing the story. “I remember, before I fell asleep, she squeezed my hand. I think that was when she died. I’m not sure…” His voice trailed off before adding, “I just had this feeling.”
Wiping the tears away, Kian continued to lean against him, soaking in his heat and strength. “Maybe it’s just a little boy’s fanciful thinking.”
If he had seen Alec’s face at that moment he might have been afraid. It was set in a mask of fury, his body shaking, hidden by Kian’s sobbing. Control was slow in coming but he never let him know, silently promising to kill the man responsible for his mother’s death.
Feeling spent after all that crying, Kian remained in his arms. Curiosity finally won out as he tilted his head back. The moment was intense for both of them. Neither dared to move.
This was it. He was going to kiss Kian. Right?
Alec’s hands, which had been holding him close, went to his waist before lifting him off his lap. This time Kian didn’t remain silent about the disappointment swallowing him whole. “You know I am really getting tired of your bipolar emotions.”
Typical Alec didn’t answer as he walked across the clearing to stare off across the smoky landscape that surrounded them. Tired, Kian wanted nothing more than to go home and climb back into bed. Somewhere he never should have left.
It didn’t take long to put away the food that had hardly been touched. Once that was done, Kian struggled with what to do. If they weren’t so far from campus he’d be tempted to walk home. On the other hand, he really didn’t want to have to be confined in the car with Alec for the time it took to get back to the campus.
It had taken a lot to open himself up to Alec, especially when he’d also been standoffish to Kian. If he were honest, it would have been nice but he hadn’t expected it. At the same time, was it necessary to shut down – again. Didn’t he know how hard that had been for Kian? Yet, all he’d gotten was a ‘sorry.’
Infuriated at those stupid games, Kian’s resolve grew. He was done with the silent treatment. “Alec, look at me.” Slowly, he turned to face Kian, despair written across his features. For a moment, Kian had nearly changed his mind and just asked to return back home. Maybe if he wasn’t so raw from talking about his mother, that might have happened.
Who was he kidding? He wanted answers and this time Kian was going to get them. With far more force than normal, he said, “What’s going on?”
Silence.
“Damn you.” Kian strode right up to him, not stopping until they were toe to toe. “We’re not leaving here until you talk to me.”
“I want to tell you but it is impossible, Kian. Too much is at stake that you don’t understand.” The pain in Alec’s eyes confirmed he believed what he said was true, but Kian no longer cared. He wanted the whole truth.
Standing his ground, Kian squared off against him. “It’s not as if I don’t already know you aren’t normal.”
Amusement showed on his features. “Really? So what would be considered not normal?”
“Uhm, let me think.” Sarcasm dripped with each word. “You can walk through fire without being burned.” He lifted a finger to begin counting all the differences. “Not to mention you somehow moved the flames out of the way so I wouldn’t get burned.”
Pacing before him, Kian’s agitation with his refusal to give answers grew. “Then there’s the fact that you somehow get into my room at night when I’m sleeping even though the door and window are always locked.” Thinking about it, he realized something had been bothering him about their previous conversation.
Stopping dead in his tracks, he turned eyes wide with alarm. “How did you even know I was in that fire? Or that I was having nightmares? I know you’ve been comforting me at night but how did you know I needed it?”
Shock registered in his eyes at Kian’s words as if Alec hadn’t realized he’d put all that together. That in itself didn’t make sense. They’d talked about each of these things before.
“We are not having this discussion.” Striding to the basket, Alec picked it up, heading out of the clearing. He failed to notice until he was halfway back to the car that Kian hadn’t followed him.
He remained there, arms crossed with his foot tapping the ground impatiently. For a moment, he feared Alec might actually leave him. Soon enough, Kian heard him stomping back. A smile caused his lips to twitch slightly as he waited for the confrontation.
Alec’s steps faltered when he saw Kian’s determination. But before he could become too smug that he was winning this time, Alec’s jaw set as he straightened his posture and glared down at him. From one breath to the next, Kian would swear Alec seemed to go from normal to looking every inch a warrior, ready to do battle.
It took all the inner strength Kian had to not cringe. Backing down was no longer an option, even if Alec’s eyes had turned into icy crystals as he stared him down.
Not stupid, Kian accepted the fear that had snaked down his spine. But the thing was, as scary as he appeared, Kian knew Alec would never hurt him, at least not physically.
No, it was time for the truth. There was no railroading Kian this time. No matter what it took, he was going to find out what Alec was hiding if it was the last thing he did.
“You know you don’t scare me.” Alec had bristled at Kian’s words, but he might as well know the facts. He spent too much time protecting Kian. There was no way Alec was going to let anything happen to him now.
He lifted an eyebrow. “Really? Maybe you just do not have any sense.”
“Insulting me isn’t going to work. I want to know how you did all those things. And how is it you give off so much heat I don’t even need a coat when you’re around?” It took a lot of effort but Kian kept his spine straight as he faced Alec head on.
Alec leaned over slightly, which only emphasized how much he towered over him. “What is going to get you to leave here?” he demanded.
“The truth.”
His shoulders sagged slightly. Crossing fingers, Kian hoped it was a sign of defeat. It wasn’t good when a gleam appeared in Alec’s eyes. “So what you are saying is that you will not go with me willingly.”
Not understanding what that meant, Kian held his ground. “Yes.”
Alec leaned over him even more until they were nose to nose. “What about unwillingly?”
Understanding flared, unleashing Kian’s temper. “Damn you, Alec - you will not lay a hand on me, do you understand me?” His finger punctuated each word against his chest. “We’re not leaving here until you tell me what is going on.”
“No.”
That was all he had to say. One word. Worse, Alec seemed to believe that was all that was needed. Fury took hold of Kian. He had never known it possible to feel such a loss of control before. “Damn you, Alec.”
“Too late.”
Frustrated, he shot back. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Not answering the question, Alec turned to put some space between them. “You are the most infuriating human I have ever met.”
“See, that’s what I’m talking about. You make these bizarre statements but you won’t explain them.” Placing his body before Alec again, he asked, “What do you mean the most infuriating human? What are you, Alec?”
His voice was raw with emotion. “Do you have any idea how hard this is for me, Kian? Neither heaven nor hell could keep me away from you but I cannot tell you what you want to know. It is just too dangerous.”
Refusing to back down, Kian continued his questions. “Too dangerous for whom?”
“My people.” His resolve was clearly faltering. Sitting down on a rock, he put his head in his hands. “You,” he whispered in despair.
Tenderly, Kian kneeled in front of him and placed his hands on Alec’s knees. The turmoil in his eyes almost made Kian stop - almost. “Alec, I have never told another person about my Mom, but I knew I could trust you.” Taking a shaky breath, afraid of his response, “Don’t you trust me?”
Pain crossed his features as he reassured Kian. “Of course, I trust you but this is not just about me.” Gently, Alec’s hand caressed his face as if willing Kian to understand.
Gently, Kian rested his hand on Alec, holding it against his cheek. “Trust me, Alec.”
Suddenly, he just disappeared. Blinking twice as if not believing that could happen, he sat there immobile. Just as suddenly, he was back. Shaken, he asked, “How did you do that?”
Placing their foreheads together, his hands framed Kian’s face. “Before I tell you, I have a request.”
He didn’t even hesitate. “Anything.”
Alec’s lips formed a brief smile. “Someday we are going to have to discuss you making promises without thinking about the consequences.”
“I told you, I trust you,” Kian told him.
Alec’s features softened at the admission. “May I kiss you?”
Kian’s heart skipped a beat. “Yes.”
There was no way to describe how much Kian felt for Alec but he knew in his heart he’d do anything for this man. His mouth was so close Kian could almost taste him. His gaze was hypnotizing; it left him feeling weak.
Slowly, Alec closed the small space, his lips lightly touching his for a moment. Heat raced through Kian as the kiss intensified. In the next instant, he felt on fire. Wrapping his arms around Alec’s neck, Kian pulled him closer, craving his heat.
With far too much ease, Alec lifted him until Kian was straddling his lap. It felt wonderful, better than he’d ever imagined in his fantasies. Alec’s tongue swept across his bottom lip causing him to gasp in surprise, which was all the invitation he needed to delve inside.
A needy moan of pleasure was pushed into the amazing kiss as Kian tightened his arms around Alec. It didn’t matter what Alec was as long as he didn’t stop kissing Kian. But eventually the kiss did stop. Their foreheads once more rested against each other as they struggled to breathe normally again. “That might have been a mistake.”
Stung by his words, Kian cringed. “Did I do it wrong?” It was humiliating to think he couldn’t even kiss but why else would he think kissing him was wrong?
He laughed. “What?”
Insulted, Kian tried to pull away from him.
“No, wait. I am sorry. I didn't mean to laugh at you.” Pulling him close again until their mouths were mere inches apart, Alec admitted, “I liked it too much but you need to know what you are getting into.”
Slightly mollified, Kian leaned back as he waited for Alec to tell him. “Fine. Tell me what you are.”
Lifting Kian easily again, Alec sat him on the rock next to him but then Alec stood and started to pace. “This is even harder than I imagined.” Stopping, he gazed down at Kian.
“What?” Maybe he should be afraid, but Kian trusted Alec. At the same time, he felt whatever Alec said would change everything and Kian had to admit he wasn’t certain he was ready for that.
“I am a demon.”
Yep. Not ready.
Kian’s entire world tilted.