Page 77 of The Dead Ex

‘Don’t you want to know who found Tanya?’

It’s not the question I am expecting.

‘Yes,’ I splutter. ‘Of course.’

‘Your ex-husband’s daughter.’

‘Nicole?’

‘She’d come over for lunch at her stepmother’s apparently.’

Poor kid. Even though I don’t care for her, it’s not nice to find a body. I know that.

‘Can you describe the relationship between the two of you?’

‘There’s no love lost, if that’s what you mean. She always disliked me, but I put that down to jealousy. David had her when he was very young. He didn’t take his obligations seriously but later, he’d decided to remember he was a father again.’

‘Yousound jealous yourself.’

‘I suppose I was. He began spending more time with her than me after we got married. I know he was trying to make up for lost time, but she didn’t want me around. So I was left on my own.’

‘And then he went off with someone else.’ Penny is looking at me carefully. ‘You must feel upset about that too.’

‘Not enough to kill Tanya, if that’s what you mean.’

‘Or your ex-husband?’

‘No! Whose side are you on?’

She tilts her head quizzically. It’s as though my solicitor is asking herself the same. ‘I’m just asking the kind of questions the prosecution will ask you in court.’

In court?I might have been arrested but I haven’t been charged yet. This doesn’t sound good at all. ‘The thing is,’ I say wearily, ‘that I can’t remember everything. I’ve told you. The drugs. The seizures.They all affect my memory.’

‘Even if I do believe you – and I want to – a jury might not buy that.’

Then she stares at me hard. ‘There’s one more piece to this puzzle, isn’t there, Vicki?’

A huge lump comes up in my throat.

‘You told me earlier that you used to work in a prison. But that’s not the full story, is it?’

I go cold. Then hot. Cold again.

‘Come on, Vicki. Did you honestly thinkthe police wouldn’t find out? Mind you, I’m surprised they’ve taken this long. I have to say,’ continues my solicitor, ‘that it didn’t look good when they told me earlier on today, and I had to explain that my own client hadn’t revealed this rather crucial piece of information. It’s going to make everything very difficult.’

She shook her head. ‘I can only help if you are totally honest with me.Tell me. I want to hear it from your own mouth. You weren’t just a prison officer, were you?’

‘All right.’ I want to curl up with embarrassment. How low can you fall?

‘I used to be,’ I say slowly, ‘a prison governor.’

26

Helen

27 November 2017

It’s my first day in the office. The place is massive; big and white and modern. There are even security guards on the door. I’m both terrified and excited! According to my research, Tanya started off in a junior role just like this.