Page 19

HOLT

We finally had an appointment with the doctor today.

It should’ve been a lot sooner, but Merit refused to throw my name around to get a quicker appointment. Trust me, I hate that bullshit. I’m not one to wave my dick in the air because my name is Holt Hill, but this is my kid we’re talking about. I probably would’ve made an exception to my dick-waving rule if it meant I could’ve seen this picture—live and in person—sooner.

This new ultrasound.

This awesome, amazing, wonderful picture of my son.

My son. Growing in Merit’s body.

Is there anything in this world more miraculous?

The answer is no. Hell no.

Her sweet voice draws my attention. “You’re gonna wear a hole in that picture if you keep touching it.”

I check it one more time and then slide it back into the folder from the doctor’s office. “Good thing we got it on our cell phones too. Did you text a copy to your parents?”

She steps into the elevator. “Of course. What about you?”

“Group text,” I say with a wink, making her giggle.

The elevator door is about to shut when a petite woman in a short skirt joins us, pulling a roller bag behind her. She’s holding a tablet and a bunch of papers in one arm. A small name tag is positioned across her large chest, and expensive sunglasses are perched on top of her head. I’m guessing she’s a pharmaceutical sales rep.

“Ground floor?” I ask.

She glances up and stares at me. It takes her all of two seconds to decide she likes what she sees. “Yes, please.” She stands a little taller and draws a slow breath of air.

I take a step back, positioning myself halfway between her and Merit, eager to see how this is going to play out.

She nods at Merit’s stomach. “Congratulations. You and your husband must be very excited.” Her predator eyes dart back and forth between the two of us.

“Oh.” Merit is caught by genuine surprise. Just another reason I love her. She glances at me before slowly answering the stranger’s question. “We’re not married.” Her eyes fall to the floor, and she folds her hands in front of her, reverting back to the Old Merit. “We’re not even together.”

The way she says it not only breaks my damn heart in two, but makes me completely furious. I want to hold her in my arms and yell at her—all at the same time.

We are together.

Always. Forever.

Happy enough with the answer she receives, the stranger—whose name tag says Felicity—turns back to me, completely ignoring Merit. “That was a nice rain we had last night. Finally cooled things off a little bit. Wouldn’t you agree? I’ve only lived here for six months, but it’s without a doubt hotter than the seventh layer of Hell.” She pops her head to the side and dramatically licks her lips. “You look familiar. Have we run into each other before? At the country club, maybe?”

Highly doubtful.

I don’t exactly frequent the country club.

I give a little smirk, playing along. “Mmm, not that I know of. I’m not really a cigars and golf type of guy.”

She chuckles and slowly undresses me with her eyes. “No, you aren’t, are you?” Her eyes narrow, and she purses her lips. “I’m guessing…beer and football. Am I right?”

Is it really a guess? She just described nearly every single adult man in the state of Alabama.

I lift my baseball cap and turn it around backward. “Guilty,” I say with a sly look.

Her eyes widen in delight and her cheeks flush.

Merit’s nose immediately scrunches, and she looks like she’s about to vomit. It’s the best thing I’ve seen in days. Well, aside from our new ultrasound picture. I lift my chin in her direction. “What’s wrong, Mer? Something smell bad?”

Felicity looks around the elevator and discreetly sniffs the air. “I don’t smell anything.”

Merit’s face doesn’t budge.

“Mer?” I ask again, loving the telltale look of jealousy etched across her features.

The elevator dings, and the doors slide open. Merit makes a beeline for the hospital lobby. Before she slinks out, she nods at our elevator enemy, Felicity. “Yeah. I think she farted.” She power-walks away, leaving us standing in the elevator.

Holy hell. I nearly die.

That was so unexpected. Merit is so freakin’ funny.

Felicity scoffs and chokes on her words. “What? No, I didn’t. I swear.”

I hold open the elevator door, ushering her out. “I wouldn’t worry about it. The pregnancy hormones make my wife very sensitive to smells.”

Her face hardens. “Your wife? She said the two of you weren’t together.”

I shrug nonchalantly. “She did? Huh. I guess she must’ve forgotten.”

Grumbling, she stomps away, dragging the suitcase behind her. “Fucking southern rednecks.”

I meet up with Merit outside. She’s leaning against the truck, pretending to be interested in something on her phone. I lean next to her, not saying anything. The suspense is killing Merit. I can taste it in the air. She’s too curious not to ask what happened.

“So… she was pretty. Did you ask her out? It’s pretty clear that’s what she wanted you to do.”

“Why would I ask her out? I’m not on the market. I’m not available. I’m in love with you.”

Her phone falls limply to her side. “If you love me, then why did you flirt with her?”

I can’t help but smile. “Because I wanted to see that little scrunched-up nose on your beautiful face.”

Her head snaps to mine. “What?! I do not make that face.”

I roll my eyes. “You most certainly do.” I push off the truck and crowd her space. My lips drag across the side of her forehead. Being this close to her nearly breaks me. I can feel my heartbeat in the pit of my stomach. “And I missed seeing it. Just like I missed you.”

If I bend a little lower, I can take her mouth.

Just. A. Little. Lower.

Abruptly, she clears her throat and gently shoves against me. When I don’t move, she lifts her eyes and blinks. “Holt,” she warns.

Reluctantly, I back away, giving her room. Taking a deep breath, she spins away and hovers her hand on the door handle, waiting for me to unlock it. When I bend past her and pull the door open, I don’t shy away from the fact that my massive erection jabs her in the back. And she may not realize it, but she doesn’t exactly shy away either. Because her back arches, and she rubs her ass against me.

Driving home, I keep glancing over at her. There’s a softness to her that wasn’t there earlier. Her features are relaxed, and she looks... content. “You look happy.”

She nods. “I am.”

I bite back a smile. “Well, me too. I’m just curious if there’s anything making you extra happy right at this second.”

She fiddles with a button on her shirt. “I’m just relieved.” Her head falls back on the headrest. “I get nervous before every single appointment. You just never know what the doctor may say, what the ultrasound may show. It’s terrifying to think something bad may happen.”

She’s right.

Just the thought of something bad happening to her or our son makes me feel like I’m trapped under a thousand-pound weight, suffocating. I can’t imagine anything worse. I’d rather spend the rest of my life rotting in a jail cell as an innocent man than even think of anything bad happening to them.

It’s hard to believe that six months ago I actually threw Merit out of my life. Hard to imagine that I even entertained the asinine idea that she could do something so vile and evil.

I am the world’s biggest dickhead.

I reach over and squeeze her forearm. “Nothing bad is gonna happen.” Before she can move away, I lift her hand and kiss her wrist. It’s something I never did with frequency before the arrest, but find myself doing all the time now. If this is all she’ll grant me, I’ll fucking take it. I’ll lap it up like a starving dog. “I’m sorry you had to go to all those appointments by yourself. That couldn’t have been easy.”

“It was nerve-racking and exciting, all at the same time.” Her face falls a little bit. “And heartbreaking. I wish you could’ve been there.” She shrugs, snorting on a sarcastic chuckle. “But it’s hard to go to something you don’t even know about.” She swallows loudly. “I’m really sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”

My jaw tenses thinking about the way I acted. “I didn’t deserve to know sooner. I was a shithead. The only one who should be sorry is me.”

And it’s true.

I was shocked when I first found out—angry, even, that Merit kept her pregnancy hidden from me. But now? It’s clear to me, Merit did what she did to protect our child and to protect her heart. I can’t blame her for that.

In fact, she’s the strongest person I know.

We spend the next few minutes driving in silence. I slow down when the Japanese steakhouse comes into view. “Are you hungry? Do you wanna stop and eat?”

She shakes her head. “We can’t. Nate is coming over to help with the Foundation website. Remember?”

“That’s right,” I say, checking the clock.

“He’s so smart with all of that technology. I told him the Foundation would pay him, but he keeps refusing. We’re really lucky; you should see what some of those web designers charge.” She side glances at me. “You think he’s gonna do something with computers? For his job, I mean. When he grows up?”

“Not sure. He’s one hell of a ball player.”

“Like the famous Holt Hill,” she says, teasing me.

I scoff, tapping my fingers against the steering wheel. “The famous Holt Hill was accused of domestic violence, broke his neck, blew out his knee, was arrested for sexually assaulting a seventeen-year-old child, and nearly lost the love of his life because of his own stupidity.” I tilt my head. “Let’s hope Nate turns out nothing like him.”

“But he also won multiple National Championships in college, played in three Super Bowls—including the two he won—saved his niece’s life, coached a high school team to a state win, and…” she looks down, studying her hands, “knows when to say he’s sorry.”

“Hey, maybe he’s not that bad after all,” I say with a playful wink as I turn into our driveway.