Page 12

HOLT

I know I’m a hard sleeper.

Unfortunately, that didn’t change. Even after everything that happened. Even after Delaney crawled around my house in the middle of the night like some freaky-ass vampire, it still didn’t change.

But it’s pretty hard to sleep when someone is constantly slamming a silverware drawer open and closed a couple of dozen feet away from your head.

Blinking against the sun, I drag my hand across my face and stretch out, wallowing into the couch. After a second, I sit up and lean back against the pillows. “And hello to you too.” My voice is low and thick with sleep.

Merit stares at me from behind the kitchen island. She’s got a plate of leftover fried rice in front of her, and her cheeks are stuffed like a chipmunk. I have to wait on her to chew and swallow.

She circles her fork around in the air. “This is completely unacceptable, Holt.”

I cock an eyebrow, pretending I don’t know what she’s talking about. “Seriously? You know that Japanese steakhouse has won awards, right?”

She dramatically rolls her eyes. “I’m not talking about the food, and you know it.” She drags her fork through the yum yum sauce and licks it. “You can’t be sleeping on the couch. I said I was moving into the Children’s Wing. Not you.”

“It didn’t feel right to leave you on your first night back. What if you woke up hungry? I wanted to be here to heat the food up for you.”

“I know how to work a microwave.”

“I’m sure you do. I just wished you would’ve used it last night.” I lean forward, balancing my forearms on my knees. “You didn’t eat at all yesterday after you got here. That can’t be good—for you or the baby. Maybe that’s why your stomach’s small.” I pick up the book from the coffee table and shake it. “This says you should be bigger.”

She spoons another forkful in her mouth. “Those things are just a guide. They’re not the Bible. I’m big enough. The doctor says everything is perfect.” She looks down and pats her stomach. “He has plenty of room to move around.” A smile tugs against her beautiful face.

I push off the couch and cross the room. “Is that what’s happening? Is he moving now?”

“Yeah,” she says softly.

I tip my head at her belly. “May I?”

She studies me, looking deeply into my eyes. I probably look like crap after sleeping on the couch all night long, but I can’t help the swell of my dick when her pupils dilate.

I pick up her can of caffeine-free diet soda and swish it around my mouth, hoping to kill the stench of morning breath before I invade her personal space. She pretends to scowl. I’m sure she thinks I don’t know when she’s pretending.

But we all know I can read her face.

Fanning both of my hands across her firm and taut bump, I frown when I don’t immediately feel anything. “What’s wrong, buddy? You stop moving? You playing a trick on your old man?”

Nothing.

“Aren’t you glad Mommy moved back home to Daddy?” I can’t help but laugh when he immediately starts kicking and flipping. “See? He knows you made a smart decision,” I say with a wink.

She spins away and busies herself with putting her dishes in the dishwasher. “The jury’s still out.”

Leaning against the countertop, I sigh, praying one day our lives can get back on track. I’ll stop at nothing to make that happen. “I need to find a doctor.”

Her eyes widen with worry, and a wild strand of hair falls from her ponytail. “What’s wrong? Are you sick?”

She’s so freakin’ funny.

“Let me rephrase that. I need to find you a new doctor. We need a baby doctor. I know you liked the other one, but I can’t imagine you wanna drive all the way down there for appointments. And what about when you go into labor?”

“I can find my own doctor.” She grabs a wet hand towel and wipes at the crumbs on the countertop, her motions slowing as she thinks. Her voice drops an octave, showcasing the unease coursing through her like a flashing neon sign. “Unless you want me to use someone specific since you’re paying for my insurance?”

“I wouldn’t dictate that, and you know it. It’s just…” I pause, shrugging. “I want the best for you. I want my family to be safe and healthy. I want you to be safe and healthy.”

She nibbles on the side of her lip.

“Anyway, Raylee said she’d get us the information for her doctor. Ella used the same one. They both say he’s great.” I drag my hand through my hair. “We can get it today; they’re coming over.”

She folds her arms across her chest. Her cleavage plumps, straining against her tank top. Talk about distracting. “Excuse me?”

“Once things…settled down…the kids wanted to come back. I couldn’t wait to see them again. They’ve been coming over on Sunday afternoons to swim.”

Her jaw tics. “I’ve got some errands to run. I’ll head out before they get here.”

“They were hoping to see you. I called them last night when I went to get the food. I had to tell them I was staying in town. Last I talked to them, I told them I was leaving, at the ass-crack of dawn today, to be with you and had no idea when I would be back home.” I cock my head, trying to gauge her reaction. “Everyone’s really excited to see you.”

She shakes her head and blinks against glassy eyes. “I don’t wanna see them.”

“Mer.” I reach for her, but she shuffles away. “Why?” I ask.

“Because I didn’t just lose you, I lost them too.” She swallows. “They left me, just like you did.”

She’s right. They did.

Because I forced them to choose. And they chose me. Even though, they knew I was wrong.

So fucking wrong.